Jaymac388 Posted June 23, 2008 Posted June 23, 2008 I've been dating this really great guy for a few weeks now. He's been engaged and wants to take things slow, which is perfectly fine with me. We do some things on our own, some things in a group, but he's always a perfect gentleman and tries to make me feel comfortable. The bad (or good, I guess) part is this: I'm starting to fall for him. I don't want to rush him or anything, but I'm just such an overthinker that I'm moving past the point of just "enjoying the ride" and moving into "oh my gosh how does he feel about me" territory. right now, he's out of the country. he's been gone for about a week, and doesn't get back until mid week. he has contacted me via the internet a few times, although he hasn't been able to talk much (which is understandeable, since he definitely has more important things to be doing right now). when he does, he talks about how much he loves where he is and how he wants to move there. i'm glad he's having a good time, but at the same time, my ex did the same thing and it kind of made me feel like i was easily left behind or left in the dust, if that makes sense. that's probably kind of selfish on my part, and chances are, he won't actually move there. other than that, he's asked how i am and everything, but he hasn't really mentioned missing me or anything. i guess that's ok since we're just dating, but still. i just hope he's into me, and i guess he is since he continually has called me so far and we've hung out at least every weekend since we've been dating. should i try to contact him when he gets back, or wait for him to get in touch with me? should i tell him i have feelings, or just wait things out and see how they go? i'm frustrated at how bad i am at this, and how i had forgotten how much falling for someone is an exciting/nervewracking experience at the same time!!!
Keridan Posted June 23, 2008 Posted June 23, 2008 I think you are right ... you are overthinking it He sounds like a good guy. Usually someone who gets described as a 'perfect gentleman' is considerate of your feelings and won't forget you to move away or anything without talking to you. He is probably just as into you as you are him. In my experience (which is a fair amount, but no relationship guru), it almost always ends up that way when you say "I want to take things slow". I wouldn't suggest being too blunt about how you feel, but there is nothing wrong with letting him know you are enjoying what is happening now. Keep him encouraged, but not overwhelmed. Don't try so hard to keep your feelings in that he thinks the opposite. Just make sure to mention you are having fun and you like spending time with him. Even if he's not crushing as hard as you are, he may still come around with encouragement. And don't go thinking how bad you are at this and all that. Everyone goes through feelings like this when they find out they care about someone more than they expected. Try to relax and have fun. You've enjoyed the ride so far, it's not going to stop if you don't take immediate action. Wish I could help more!
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