BigDreamer08 Posted June 22, 2008 Posted June 22, 2008 ...after a few awesome dates, talking on the phone, constantly texting, calling me babe and hunny, and making out, just up and not call or txt or anything? its been two days. (maybe im just impatient) I mean it seems Ive gotten this a couple times and that's why I've been dating off and on (a few people in the last few months.) But there's never an explanation...one day they say they like me, was a good date, talking, and then no response to a point where i generally don't hear from them again. Am I just assuming the worst or has this guy dropped me already? He works 12 hrs a day, and even when we were talking, it was generally after work when he hadn't pass out as soon as he got home (hes a cable technition and does home improvement), or on days where hes off. He has two kids, which i never saw as a problem and has them on the weekends.. I mean he came and drove to my house which was completely in the opposite direction he was heading to see me at 1am when he had to work at 7am the next morning and just sat and talked till three..i was laughing about a night where i walked an hr from work at 12am and then my dad came and picked me up...he was like... babe, if u cant find a ride call me even if its 1am. He had last told me that he was going to try and take Monday off just to spend the day with me. and now im thinking he would have tried to reach me if he still wanted to do something. Soooo, what do u think? Guys have u just not called, etc after acting like everything was great? Any thoughts please. On another note..The last guy i was planning on seeing stopped calling after a certain point and actually ditched out on our "first" date without saying he had to cancel...well he did call me after like 3-4 days and said he was terribly sick, made second plans and then didnt call or email me or anything about plans...i decided to let that guy go and move on to someone who was more interested in me.
Mezzi Posted June 22, 2008 Posted June 22, 2008 I dont know what to say, you say it has happened before so maybe when you think that things are going great they arent. It depends on the situation if everything was really going okay and you have not heard from him in two days then you can call him. I remember everything seemed to be going fine with my ex-boyfriend in our early stages and he didnt call me for 9 days. However, I did not call him. When he did I did not accept his calls and he left me a couple of voicemails saying that something happen and when he sees me he will tell me. He never told me the reason. So maybe something has just come up and the guy you are dating has his hands full. Though I cannot understand what could be so demanding that someone cannot even place a call only a few seconds long to explain what is going on with them but wtv.
Author BigDreamer08 Posted June 22, 2008 Author Posted June 22, 2008 Yah I don't understand either. I stopped even texting good morning or hows work as I had been as of a few days ago, just cause i wasn't even getting a response to that as of Friday. Guess the only thing is see if he calls or writes in the next day or so. I mean I cant think of anything that may have caused him to do this on my part, no disagreements, etc...he made it clear hes all for being and hearing from the other person of interest as much as possible, so maybe I'm hoping he lost his phone or is so sick he cant use his fingers to dial a phone number or "I'm sick"(which is far fetch) I'm not desperate and know when to call it quits...I just don't understand how "some" guys find this so easy, especially when "acting" as though things were going somewhere. fingers crossed i guess, but id hope if he does finially contact me he has a good reason for ignoring me. (the previous guy who finially responding after setting up the second first date, was very disappointed when i said I had moved on because I need someone who can actually communicate and nearly two weeks with no corresponding did it for me) I have guys flirt with me in situations where im not even interested...on the bus, at work, on the phone (i work at a call center) yet the guys i like just dont seem to care after a few dates. Im a nice person, alittle shy at first, cute in my standards but not extemely attractive, but id say im fun to be around, and talk to. I just dont know, part of me just wants to give up.
Mezzi Posted June 22, 2008 Posted June 22, 2008 Hey, dont give up, sometimes it takes awhile to acquire good things. Not everyone is lucky enough to have good things come easy. Just take it one day at a time. Trust me I can relate, I have been single basically since 2006 and I have only had one boyfriend. I keep to myself and I get complimented often but no boyfriend I am depressed right now because I am sooooo alone since I have next to no friends and no boyfriend. However, I look forward to knowing that I will eventually find someone really nice. Just be positive and you will find a guy that is really attentive and interested in calling you every minute of the day. Dont worry. You said that the guys you seem really interested in usually stop communicating. Maybe the guys you really like just arent a good match for you? I dunno..
LucreziaBorgia Posted June 22, 2008 Posted June 22, 2008 Maybe you are sending out subconscious signals that they are reacting to. It sounds like you are afraid of rejection, and probably end up doing things to try to assure you won't get rejected - or at the very least dropping hints here and there to reassure yourself: asking when he will call, or mentioning the other guys who didn't and how that made you feel, etc. You may be working so hard to overcome the 'no callback' that you may be cutting yourself off at the knees. Maybe you come off subtly 'needy' to these guys and they aren't interested once they begin to really see it after a couple of dates. I'm not suggesting that you are ARE needy, just that you may be sending off some signals as such that you may not even be aware of. The tone in which you are asking your questions here may well carry over into your RL, and that is what men pick up on and shy away from. In other words, it probably isn't you so much as it is your fears that you won't get a call back from these guys. That fear is likely what they are reacting to.
Marcas75 Posted June 22, 2008 Posted June 22, 2008 There is the possibility that he doesn't want to show that he's needy and pushy. Two days is not that bad I think.
the_blur Posted June 22, 2008 Posted June 22, 2008 There is the possibility that he doesn't want to show that he's needy and pushy. Two days is not that bad I think. Seriously. That's what I was thinking too. Dating rules are retarded.
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