Mark2134 Posted June 21, 2008 Posted June 21, 2008 Hi all, new to this site, look forward to posting to all your love stories etc.. First, I feel I have to tell this story, I need to get it off my chest and if you feel compelled to write something, please do, it's driving me crazy. The begininng, about 5 years ago, in 2003, at school, I saw a girl in the year below me who I found captivating, I asked my friend who she was and she told me and gave me her number. I text her telling her who i was etc. and we exchanged messages for ages until i finally met her in person aobut a week later. From then, it was the typical nervous teenage crush, with both of us clearly interested in each other. She had a boyfriend at the time, and eventually dumped him in what appeared to be to make way for me to ask her out. I didn't straight away, and after a few more months, I did ask her out and we were offically going out. Then, a few weeks into the relationship my parents were going through a divorce and I felt this girl was to good for me, and i got scared and broke it off. She was heartbroken. She has told me since that she cried for months afterwards. I had no idea how much she liked me. For about 6 months afterwards, whenever i would see her at school she would 'evil' me and we didn't talk. Then we started talking about 9 months later, but it was careful and polite, like how are you etc... then we spoke on and off for the next 2 years. Then since we were talking more regularly I went round to her house and we ended up on the bed, lying next to each other, and i was caressing her face and as she had another boyfriend at the time i was jokingly trying to kiss her and she would squirm and jokingly move out of the way, but never reisisted. Fast forward to a few weeks ago, and i went for dinner with her at a nice restaraunt, it was pleasant and as we hadn't seen much of each other it was slightly formal and rigid, but not uncomfortable. Then, a few days ago i suggested we go to a theme park, she agreed, something which I was surprised at as if she was only interested in me as a friend would she agree to a whole day at a theme park with me? Anyway, it was a fantastic day, she laughed pretty much the whole time and at one point we got lost in some woods and I was pretending we we're going to have to make a fire and live there, she found it hilarious and we had a really good time, a lot better than i expected it to be. I sensed the spark that we had when i first met her, and i hope she did to, but of course she hasn't said that, i just want her in my life. My question is basically after i broke her heart all those years ago, she seems to still be holding back a bit and playing hard to get, she doesn't compliment me, she never really has (think that's just her) unsure if she will get hurt again i don't know, but i'm really not sure if going for a nice meal out and to a theme park is the behaviour of 2 people that are just friends. I so want to tell her how i feel but i think that would be weak of me, I want to show her, by looking in her eyes and telling her how sorry i was for breaking her heart, and then kissing her. She is all i can think about, it's driving me crazy, i feel our realtionship is like unfinished business, and i cannot get over her or consider another girl. I want to know what you think, is another chance possible, or did i blow it 5 years ago? What can i do? Thanks, and sorry it's a long story!
PandaStillLovesBunny Posted June 21, 2008 Posted June 21, 2008 My question is basically after i broke her heart all those years ago, she seems to still be holding back a bit and playing hard to get, she doesn't compliment me, she never really has (think that's just her) unsure if she will get hurt again i don't know, but i'm really not sure if going for a nice meal out and to a theme park is the behaviour of 2 people that are just friends. I so want to tell her how i feel but i think that would be weak of me, I want to show her, by looking in her eyes and telling her how sorry i was for breaking her heart, and then kissing her. She is all i can think about, it's driving me crazy, i feel our realtionship is like unfinished business, and i cannot get over her or consider another girl. I want to know what you think, is another chance possible, or did i blow it 5 years ago? What can i do? What can you do? Well, I know that it's not the usual modus operandi around these parts of the boards, but you could always: Go ahead and do it. Tell her that you're sorry. Tell her that you were messed up at the time and that you love her, and that you're sorry that you ever let her go. Does it sound weak? Possibly. But it's how you feel. I spent the last ten months in "NC" with my ex-girlfriend, and I love her to death. I want her back so badly I can barely get up in the morning. So what did I do? I told her. I shot her an email saying "I'm sorry. I still love you. I've always loved you. I didn't speak to you for so long because you dumped me, and it hurt, and I rationalized it by saying that I had the moral high ground, and that YOU should talk to ME. But I can't fool myself anymore, because I still love you." That's just a part of my story, but it's just an example. The worst that can happen if you tell her how you feel is that she'll get weirded out and stop hanging out with you, and then you'll be free to start the healing process and look out for someone else. The worst that can happen if you DON'T is that she actually did still love you, but decided to give up because you clearly weren't interested in being anything more than friends. One thing is certain: if you don't tell her, you will have ZERO chance. It's like Gretzky said: "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take." And, just in my personal opinion - if you can remain like that five years after breaking up with a girl, you, my friend, are one lucky son of a gun.
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