wmrjw82 Posted June 21, 2008 Posted June 21, 2008 Unbelievable. So I went out with this amazing girl last Thursday had a great evening. We were both laughing and enjoying each other. But the warning sign was there when she told me she and her ex had recently broke up. Well, we planned a second date she blew me off and i didn't talk to her for a few days until she text'd me today.... "i'm sorry.... you were right... i still have feelings for my ex, i guess its too soon for me to date. i'm sorry"... at first i txt back, "give me a chance i can change that ;)".... but then i thought about how pathetic i sounded and sent her another txt about an hour later. i said, "actually now that i think about it... i really dont have the time to be chasing girls at this point in my life =) i understand though. Thanks for lett me know. Take care! =)" She replied to that one in like 2 minutes with... "you too ___. good luck"... and then she was out of my life. This sucks I really liked her. Did I tell her the right thing but not trying to chase her? She had been pretty distant for the past week so i'm sure she's still in heavy contact w/ her ex so.... i figured it was no win anyway. Normally i wouldn't have put much thought into this since i knew she had just broke up with him but it was the best date i've had in a long time. I mean we really clicked. Or atleast I thought so...
xpaperxcutx Posted June 21, 2008 Posted June 21, 2008 Well you can't pursue a girl whose heart just isn't in it. Go ahead and pursue other interests. If fate would have it, you might meet her again one of these days, and then you would seize the opportunity.
Author wmrjw82 Posted June 21, 2008 Author Posted June 21, 2008 Well you can't pursue a girl whose heart just isn't in it. Go ahead and pursue other interests. If fate would have it, you might meet her again one of these days, and then you would seize the opportunity. Well that's the annoying thing. I know i'll see her again because she goes to my gym... how do I act around her? I feel like if i smile act casual and go talk to her she'll think of me as a "friend"... a part of me would rather be nothing to her than be in the "friend realm". Should i smile and nod but not talk to her unless she comes up to me and starts a conversation?
xpaperxcutx Posted June 21, 2008 Posted June 21, 2008 Well that's the annoying thing. I know i'll see her again because she goes to my gym... how do I act around her? I feel like if i smile act casual and go talk to her she'll think of me as a "friend"... a part of me would rather be nothing to her than be in the "friend realm". Should i smile and nod but not talk to her unless she comes up to me and starts a conversation? Basically she's not ready to be in a relationship. Even if you still harbor feelings for her, the chances of her reciprocating are slim. It's not more about avoidance, but try to limit the time you spent with her, for your sake. While you're slowing moving forward, give her space to kind of forget her ex and actually miss spending time with you.
imbewildered Posted June 21, 2008 Posted June 21, 2008 Well that's the annoying thing. I know i'll see her again because she goes to my gym... how do I act around her? I feel like if i smile act casual and go talk to her she'll think of me as a "friend"... a part of me would rather be nothing to her than be in the "friend realm". Should i smile and nod but not talk to her unless she comes up to me and starts a conversation? You were used in her game of ego reinflation and now you are being discarded . She was hurt/ angry/ frustrated/ upset/ deflated and so on, because she and her Ex had a bustup. She temporarily swung over to you to get her ego pumped up again by having you go all goo goo and give her some of "the drug" - ATTENTION from a man.. She got from what she wanted from you by pretending to be interested in you, and then she discarding you after she achieved her emotional objective. You were a pawn in a common female game. Cut her off. Ignore her and do not go back for more.
Author wmrjw82 Posted June 21, 2008 Author Posted June 21, 2008 You were used in her game of ego reinflation and now you are being discarded . She was hurt/ angry/ frustrated/ upset/ deflated and so on, because she and her Ex had a bustup. She temporarily swung over to you to get her ego pumped up again by having you go all goo goo and give her some of "the drug" - ATTENTION from a man.. She got from what she wanted from you by pretending to be interested in you, and then she discarding you after she achieved her emotional objective. You were a pawn in a common female game. Cut her off. Ignore her and do not go back for more. Wow... someone really messed with you huh? Was never really goo goo over her... just liked her
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted June 21, 2008 Posted June 21, 2008 Wow... someone really messed with you huh? Was never really goo goo over her... just liked her hahaha...seriously. Anyways, just be cool and friendly when you see her at the gym. You are a cool guy, I'm sure, so just act like's it's noskin off your back, because I'm sure it isn't. If you don't want to be her friend, just keep communication short and sweet.
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted June 21, 2008 Posted June 21, 2008 You were used in her game of ego reinflation and now you are being discarded . She was hurt/ angry/ frustrated/ upset/ deflated and so on, because she and her Ex had a bustup. She temporarily swung over to you to get her ego pumped up again by having you go all goo goo and give her some of "the drug" - ATTENTION from a man.. She got from what she wanted from you by pretending to be interested in you, and then she discarding you after she achieved her emotional objective. You were a pawn in a common female game. Cut her off. Ignore her and do not go back for more. Or maybe...she was interested..went on the date and had a good time but realized the OP was not a match.
imbewildered Posted June 21, 2008 Posted June 21, 2008 Wow... someone really messed with you huh? Was never really goo goo over her... just liked her The point is that SHe did not like YOU enough to proceed to get to know you. Look how quickly she was willing to turn away from you and go back to her EX after your wonderful date. I guess that you need to get treated like this a few more times before you develop the skill of seeing these AWs for who they really are. Find a woman who is NOT still invested in some other guy. Research the topic of "rebound guy " and you will recognize your good self. Good lick next time around.
mixwell Posted June 21, 2008 Posted June 21, 2008 Unbelievable. So I went out with this amazing girl last Thursday had a great evening. We were both laughing and enjoying each other. But the warning sign was there when she told me she and her ex had recently broke up. Well, we planned a second date she blew me off and i didn't talk to her for a few days until she text'd me today.... "i'm sorry.... you were right... i still have feelings for my ex, i guess its too soon for me to date. i'm sorry"... at first i txt back, "give me a chance i can change that ;)".... but then i thought about how pathetic i sounded and sent her another txt about an hour later. i said, "actually now that i think about it... i really dont have the time to be chasing girls at this point in my life =) i understand though. Thanks for lett me know. Take care! =)" She replied to that one in like 2 minutes with... "you too ___. good luck"... and then she was out of my life. This sucks I really liked her. Did I tell her the right thing but not trying to chase her? She had been pretty distant for the past week so i'm sure she's still in heavy contact w/ her ex so.... i figured it was no win anyway. Normally i wouldn't have put much thought into this since i knew she had just broke up with him but it was the best date i've had in a long time. I mean we really clicked. Or atleast I thought so... I think the 1st text sounded kinda lame and a desperate attempt which you know.. You should have said something like " I understand.. Well good luck in whatever you choose" With a recent break-up she will be confused and the best thing is to just leave her alone. If she is interested enough in you then she will let you know and contact you. I wouldn't waste too much energy on this girl especially since she openly admitted to still have feelings for her ex.
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