iwish Posted June 18, 2008 Posted June 18, 2008 It's been ages since i was last with her.. Two and a half weeks ago we spent a passionate night in a hotel.. 4 days after that i saw her with another guy.. She accused me of following her (absolute tosh!) Then i went NC for a week... A week later she texted me on my birthday, said that she didn't want to ruin my day but wished me a happy birthday anyway.. I replied with a soppy text, saying that she couldn't upset me with contact and that it would be great to see her some time (i suggested a day).. She replied with 'Sorry i can't' Now i'm back at work and went onto that bloody facebook.. And of course i saw pictures of her with her new man at a party on my birthday... I hurt like a mother ... and still miss her.. damn it!! When o when will the pain go..
northstar1 Posted June 18, 2008 Posted June 18, 2008 It's been ages since i was last with her.. Two and a half weeks ago we spent a passionate night in a hotel.. 4 days after that i saw her with another guy.. She accused me of following her (absolute tosh!) Then i went NC for a week... A week later she texted me on my birthday, said that she didn't want to ruin my day but wished me a happy birthday anyway.. I replied with a soppy text, saying that she couldn't upset me with contact and that it would be great to see her some time (i suggested a day).. She replied with 'Sorry i can't' Now i'm back at work and went onto that bloody facebook.. And of course i saw pictures of her with her new man at a party on my birthday... I hurt like a mother ... and still miss her.. damn it!! When o when will the pain go.. Sorry to hear that man. First step is to delete her, or yourself off Facebook. Facebook ends up causing more problems that it's worth.
sailing Posted June 18, 2008 Posted June 18, 2008 Sorry you're hurting, but I agree with northstar1 - don't pour salt in those wounds! By the sounds of it, you have tried everything. I have a feeling that if not even a romantic night at a hotel had the effect you were hoping for, it's time to let go for good. I understand if your pride is wounded by her accusing you of stalking, but as long as it's not just redress you seek from her, she will probably view any continued contact as just that - however infuriating that may be. I bet your thoughts are spinning. Just walk away. Breathe out.
Author iwish Posted June 18, 2008 Author Posted June 18, 2008 Yep you're both right.. Putting salt on the wounds constantly sets me back.. It's a matter of will power of not looking on bloody facebook.. She looked so happy .. but then you do look happy in pictures don't you... I have indeed tried everything possible for this girl, not only the hotel but when we got back together again after the original break up i took her on some amazing dates.. bloody expensive.. I don't know it just really hurts that i tried and tried and ended up without her, she never really tried with me and in fact i should've dumped her.. but i loved her too much to do that... I really have to let this girl go, i've not contacted her since she said no to meeting up, it was left with me looking pathetic and her probably saying to her new fella, 'he just won't leave me alone'.. It was the birthday text that set me off again you see.. I thought she cared.. I'm not angry with her, i'm angry with myself for still thinking about her, for still wondering what is the best way to leave it.. Just vanish, or let her know that i've tried my hardest and i'm giving up and that's it.. AAAGGHH!! It's good to rant on here
northstar1 Posted June 18, 2008 Posted June 18, 2008 Yep you're both right.. Putting salt on the wounds constantly sets me back.. It's a matter of will power of not looking on bloody facebook.. She looked so happy .. but then you do look happy in pictures don't you... I have indeed tried everything possible for this girl, not only the hotel but when we got back together again after the original break up i took her on some amazing dates.. bloody expensive.. I don't know it just really hurts that i tried and tried and ended up without her, she never really tried with me and in fact i should've dumped her.. but i loved her too much to do that... I really have to let this girl go, i've not contacted her since she said no to meeting up, it was left with me looking pathetic and her probably saying to her new fella, 'he just won't leave me alone'.. It was the birthday text that set me off again you see.. I thought she cared.. I'm not angry with her, i'm angry with myself for still thinking about her, for still wondering what is the best way to leave it.. Just vanish, or let her know that i've tried my hardest and i'm giving up and that's it.. AAAGGHH!! It's good to rant on here There are no perfect paths to coping and moving on from someone. We've all done this by trial and error. Some have broken NC and regretted it, others broke it and feel okay about it, as it was necessary for them to get some feelings out before moving on. I doubt anyone who has finally moved on and gotten over it, can look back and say 'wow, i did everything right in moving on.' That being said, I would seriously take her or yourself off facebook. The temptation is too great to check her page, if not now, then next week. its like an addict going back for 'just one more fix' - knowing it's gonna set back their recovery. You need to look out for yourself now, and what YOU need.
sailing Posted June 18, 2008 Posted June 18, 2008 Again, I agree with northstar1: when you're in this state you won't be able to rely on your willpower alone to stay off her facebook page. Delete! As for the birthday text, well, it was just unfortunate timing. This is how I see it: She must have known her text would invite further contact and she probably hesitated. In the end she decided to send it anyway. She cares - not in the way you want her to, but she cares. She has moved on but didn't want to hurt you even more by ignoring you on your birthday. Find some consolation in that - it's a good note on which to end things, and this you will be thankful for in the future.
critter909 Posted June 18, 2008 Posted June 18, 2008 It really sounds like you need to go NC. Looks like she is using you and not considering your feelings that still linger for her. For your own sake stay off facebook and go NC
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