brokenthinker Posted June 17, 2008 Posted June 17, 2008 So it has been 10 months since my wife cheated on me again and left me for some guy she met on a video game. For those of you who dont know I was out of town and she decided to take a trip to texas to meet this kid, he was 21 she is 24. They moved in together after knowing each other for just a few weeks over the phone. My Original Post / Situation: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t138805/ I thought it would last forever, I thought this time she would get away with it, and this cheating would have a happy ending. I talked to her for the first time in 10 months for 2 hours on the phone. She is doing horrible. He finally left her. He told her he didnt want to be with her because she was married, and she isnt a baptist like him. (deep down i feel he was just using her the whole time for sex). So here she is devestated and feeling broken, while I have spent the past 10 months rebuilding my life. I finally got to the point where I don't think about her hardly at all. Maybe once a week if I'm lucky a thought will cross my mind. I started dating a girl, my best friends little sister, and that took my mind off of her for a while, but she ended up using me... guess it was the fact she is young and still immature. All in all, my wifes health has gone south, she barely makes enough to survive, she is making min wage, missed this months rent, been dumped, her family has cut her off, and now Danny... her whole world.... has dumped her too! We are not reconciling, I have moved on and I don't think a 3x cheater should get a 4th chance anyways. But we have agreed to remain distant friends, and do talk on AIM occasionally. When I talked to her on the phone I told her I still cared for her and if I could help her I would, but I did throw in the "i told you so" and she agreed that I was right! She gave me the heartfelt tearful appology I se desperately had wanted but never thought I would get. Despite all this, I still find myself to be rather lonely. I'm 25, I feel like I've missed the boat and there are no decent good (non slutty) girls out there for me. I lost over 100lbs since this happened, I'm down to 173, I'm trim and cut and look hella good. I make more money than I ever have in my life, I've travelled europe 2x and taiwan once since she left. But all in all I feel my life is empty still, and I really do feel like I wont ever meet a decent girl who will love and respect me for who I am. I don't even know where I would find a girl.... So thats the update Loveshack!
LakesideDream Posted June 17, 2008 Posted June 17, 2008 So it has been 10 months since my wife cheated on me again and left me for some guy she met on a video game. For those of you who dont know I was out of town and she decided to take a trip to texas to meet this kid, he was 21 she is 24. They moved in together after knowing each other for just a few weeks over the phone. My Original Post / Situation: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t138805/ I thought it would last forever, I thought this time she would get away with it, and this cheating would have a happy ending. I talked to her for the first time in 10 months for 2 hours on the phone. She is doing horrible. He finally left her. He told her he didnt want to be with her because she was married, and she isnt a baptist like him. (deep down i feel he was just using her the whole time for sex). So here she is devestated and feeling broken, while I have spent the past 10 months rebuilding my life. I finally got to the point where I don't think about her hardly at all. Maybe once a week if I'm lucky a thought will cross my mind. I started dating a girl, my best friends little sister, and that took my mind off of her for a while, but she ended up using me... guess it was the fact she is young and still immature. All in all, my wifes health has gone south, she barely makes enough to survive, she is making min wage, missed this months rent, been dumped, her family has cut her off, and now Danny... her whole world.... has dumped her too! We are not reconciling, I have moved on and I don't think a 3x cheater should get a 4th chance anyways. But we have agreed to remain distant friends, and do talk on AIM occasionally. When I talked to her on the phone I told her I still cared for her and if I could help her I would, but I did throw in the "i told you so" and she agreed that I was right! She gave me the heartfelt tearful appology I se desperately had wanted but never thought I would get. Despite all this, I still find myself to be rather lonely. I'm 25, I feel like I've missed the boat and there are no decent good (non slutty) girls out there for me. I lost over 100lbs since this happened, I'm down to 173, I'm trim and cut and look hella good. I make more money than I ever have in my life, I've travelled europe 2x and taiwan once since she left. But all in all I feel my life is empty still, and I really do feel like I wont ever meet a decent girl who will love and respect me for who I am. I don't even know where I would find a girl.... So thats the update Loveshack! You're 25, there's lots of time to meet the right girl, and you will. Just let it happen. Don't slide back and put yourself in a situation where you could become #4, being #3 should have taught you that lesson. Rejoice that you are doing great. Don't worry about how she's doing.. and get that divorce. You are one traffic accident from being penniless!
Confused9 Posted June 17, 2008 Posted June 17, 2008 MARRY ME! HAHA. BT, it's been 10 months - in hindsight that is a small part of your life. You can't expect to meet someone immediately and fall in love. You need to focus on you and do you honestly think you are ready for a serious relationship? You aren't even divorced yet. Don't put a time frame on it. When the time is right, she'll come around. You are 25 - that's 2 years YOUNGER than me and you are saying 'you missed the boat' if that's true than I better just drowned myself now! WE are still young. We have our lives ahead of us - let's make the best of this situation (both of our stories are similiar as you know) and live life. I know you're lonely. I am lonely too, but eventually, we won't be lonely anymore and we will find someone. Maybe they will be Mr and Mrs Right...maybe they won't, but as they say...once you stop looking - when you least expect it...it will come.
Author brokenthinker Posted June 17, 2008 Author Posted June 17, 2008 haha I know right! Well he is an alcoholic and a drug user too, so what should she have expected! But she swears she is only going to live for the lord now and abstain from sex until she is remarried. I am filing for divorce in the next couple of weeks to end this stuff. Thank god Texas only has a 2 month cooling off period... could be worse, if we were still in jersey its 18 months!
pelicanpreacher Posted June 18, 2008 Posted June 18, 2008 When I talked to her on the phone I told her I still cared for her and if I could help her I would, but I did throw in the "i told you so" and she agreed that I was right! She gave me the heartfelt tearful appology I se desperately had wanted but never thought I would get. quote] Was her apology accompanied with an explantaion why she she did it and said some of the things she said, especially when you were earnestly trying to reconcile with her? You're 25 right now so there's no rush to get involved in another deep commitment. As a matter of fact, I'd advise that you wait until you're 30 before you get serious again. No women should get close enough to use you during the time being for any circumstances. When you do get motivated toward developing a long term relationship remember that you are neither a therapist nor a "knight in shining armor"! Seek a woman who is fully actualized by life experience, financially independent, mature enough to appreciate a good man, and who shares the same values, goals, and interests as yours. Avoid, if you can, the following types of women: A) Gold Diggers B) Mentally diseased C) Victims of childhood or spousal abuse (unless they have been certified as cured/healed by a panel of licensed mental health professionals) D) Any woman under the age of 28
whichwayisup Posted June 18, 2008 Posted June 18, 2008 Can I ask why you waited so long to divorce? Good luck and I hope you find happiness again one day. Don't let this ruin your life!
bligh Posted June 18, 2008 Posted June 18, 2008 Would she be calling you if she was still with "danny"? Seems to me that justice has been served. Just thank god you didn't have any children. I'm 47 and looking at starting over. It is never too late. Just take your time, have fun, and don't worry about finding "the women" for you. She will eventually appear and you will thank God yourself that you got yourself away from such a selfish, immature, damaged women. good luck
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