CailinPig Posted June 16, 2008 Posted June 16, 2008 I have no self respect or dignity. My ex broke up with me three months ago. He has a new girlfriend. I contact him almost every day. He doesn't respond. I used to be the opposite, like "Hell no, I won't let a man walk all over me!" Now I feel like I'm nothing. I deserve to be spat on. He has screwed me over. When I was texting me a lot, he sent a text saying: "You've screwed up everything for me and my gf. just piss off." I was so hurt and so angry that he spoke to me like that. I stopped contacting him. I then got an email off him three days later apologising for what he'd said and tellin me that I can't text him cos his gf gets mad when I do. I didn't reply. I went to Spain on holidays. The day I came back, I had three missed calls from him. He texted me telling me he was still in love with me and he wanted to get over me. Foolishly, I replied and got back into the habit of contacting him. Since then, we have slept together three times. I shouldn't have done it. he has a gf. He's the instigator every time. I get pulled back in everytime even though i tell myself I won't. He then doesn't contact me. Where is my dignity? I've lost myself. I hate my life, a life I once loved so much. I can't suffer like this much more. I'm so lonely.
Nevermind Posted June 16, 2008 Posted June 16, 2008 You need some practical things, to keep you from contacting. At your rate, you can't just do it out of willpower. Here are some suggestions: change your phone numer and don't give your new # to him. This way he can't call you. Change your e-mail adress, or block his. Block his texts. Tell a good friend. Make the persons around you aware of what you're going through. If people around you know, it's harder to "just do it". Group support is imporant. Take a good look at when you were texting him. Is there a routine, a pattern? If so, change it. You were texting when you were watching tv? Go for a walk during these hours. Enroll in some classes, and keep busy. You'll learn something new and meet new people. Treat yourself. Put everything away that reminds you of him. If possible, make a box and store it at a friend's house. This way, you can't go through it during a sobbing session. ((hugs)) You can do it!
Author CailinPig Posted June 16, 2008 Author Posted June 16, 2008 My friends know about everything and they tell me to not contact him, but to no avail. I do anyway. I text him sometimes just cos I wanna tell him somethin interestin related to him, or sometimes when I miss him and I feel sad. UGH. Thanx nevermind. Why did you call yourself that? You don't happen to like nirvana, do u?
Nevermind Posted June 16, 2008 Posted June 16, 2008 It was what my ex used to say to me whenever he was grumpy and I wanted to talk about it. He never wanted to discuss anything, so it was either "nevermind" or "doesn't matter". I felt that pretty much anything I had to say, was not important. So it was appropriate for a forum. The first one was shorter. Then, when you feel the urge to text him, text them. And delete his number and all his texts.
Author CailinPig Posted June 16, 2008 Author Posted June 16, 2008 No way! What an a** your ex was!! Good riddence, Nevermind! You can do better than him! Ahhh, I feel like I'm the unsolvable stubborn case! I've tried textin my friends instead of him but it doesn't give me the same feeling. I guess I'm destined to annoy the crap outta him forever!! haha!
Nevermind Posted June 16, 2008 Posted June 16, 2008 Mh. You really need to work on it. It can become a habit, and than you're stuck with it. But he is not worthy of your attention, he is a cheater and doesn't treat you right. What are you usually texting him about?
Author CailinPig Posted June 16, 2008 Author Posted June 16, 2008 God, I dunno. Good question! Ok, I'll give you some examples of what I've texted him about: - To tell him me and my friend had had an argument and I felt hurt - To tell him I miss him (yes, bad move, I only did it once) - To explain anything that comes to light about our past relatiosnhip that I know he'd wanna know - To tell him if any of my friends has good news (getting into a college course, moving in with their bf etc) I rang him just there cos I was feeling down today. He didn't answer but a second after I hung up, he rang back. He was in work. We just chatted about stuff. He asked me did me and my friend solve our argument. He told me some stories about work etc. It cheered me up immensley. He's a drug to me.
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