jadedone Posted June 14, 2008 Posted June 14, 2008 My ex's sister sent me a message asking for my number. She later called me and dropped a bomb on me. My ex is pregnant by me, and that is why she has been lost/confused and not talking to me. Her sister made me promise to not reveal that I know. She has been trying to convince my ex to tell me, but my ex is just shutting down. The sister thought I had a right to know. This is now driving me insane. SHe still needs time and space to sort things out, but how long do I wait?
CailinPig Posted June 14, 2008 Posted June 14, 2008 Holy crap, Her sister shouldn't have contacted you, as far as I'm concerned. that's too serious a matter for her to have involved you in herself. that said, your ex should've told you herself. You gotta go back to the sister for advice, I'm afraid. Try convince her to tell your ex she told you, so that it's out in the open and you can speak about it
carhill Posted June 14, 2008 Posted June 14, 2008 IMO, better to get everything out in the open. Secrets just cause more hurt. Does the sister's opinion of you matter to you? My experience has been that sisters nearly always prioritize their relationship over that with a man. So, regardless of how you reveal your knowledge, you'll always be more under the bus. With other issues, I might counsel silence. With a human life at stake (presumably), I think things require a more direct approach. If she is indeed pregnant, do you want to be a father to this child?
Author jadedone Posted June 14, 2008 Author Posted June 14, 2008 I've gotten the more exact story from her sister on why my ex broke up with me. It all started when my ex told me she might be pregnant, but later that night when she got home she sent a text that she took a test and it was negative. She was already overwhelmed with a custody agreement issue wiht her daughter's father, and she was going through finals, and about to lose her job so she got overwhelmed and told me she wasn't ready for a relationship. We still talked almost every day for 2 weeks. According to sister she never took a pregnancy test that night. She took a test 2 weeks later and it was positive. Which coincides with when she stopped talking to me, and started putting messages on her myspace about being lost/confused. I want to be a father, and I had told her before that I would not freak out like her previous ex did. it's been 2 weeks since I last sent her a message. My plan was to wait 2 more weeks before breaking my silence. Unless I hear from her first I will wait a couple more weeks. then I have no choice but to confront her on it.
Author jadedone Posted June 24, 2008 Author Posted June 24, 2008 Update: I still have not heard from my ex. I've taken myself off invisible, and even when we are online at the same time she still won't say anything. I want to confront her, but if her sister lied about her being pregnant I'll look like a crazy idiot. If she is pregnant, it's early enough that she may just deny it.
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