littletegls Posted June 12, 2008 Posted June 12, 2008 (wasn't sure where to post?) hey, new here. i was reading some of the forums and this seemed like a nice place to start, i need advice from other people besides my friends, because they all tell me the same thing. here's my story. in the beginning of september 2007, i met the most amazing girl in the world. now this is going to sound really messed up, but i promise its really not what it seems like. at the time, i had been dating her sister, and my best friend, had been dating her. i broke up with her sister because i didn't have feelings for her sister the way i did her. shortly after, my friend broke up with her and gave me the okay to start dating her. we started talking and instantly clicked. she seemed perfect, the most amazing girl in the world. we started dating november 2007 and had the most amazing whirlwind romance a person could have. believe me, it was perfect. in january of 2008, we were forced to break up. i, being a college student, her parents decided they didnt want their high school daughter around me because she had gotten herself into some things that i of all people had nothing to do with, and chose to point fingers at me. it was a very messy, upsetting break up. we parted ways and spoke on and off over the next few months until march of 2008 hit. on march 6, 2008 we had a conference (myself, her, her father, and mother), and i explained that what she had gotten into had nothing to do with me, and it was other people (i was being honest as well, i really didnt get her into those things), and showed them proof (text messages, emails, etc.) her parents allowed us to see each other again. i, was happy, above all things, to see her again, simply because, i felt she was the love of my life. but then things changed. she began to say that she missed the "old" me, that she didn't want a relationship right now (we weren't in one), that she didnt want to be friends, or friends with benefits, but "more than friends," but "not together." which i had no idea what that was, and i have tried everything with her. i have tried giving her space, giving her time, buying her things, showing her im always there for her, etc. it seems all we do is fight. all i really want, is to figure out a way to try to get her to see me and know that its me, that she can love me and its okay to do so. it seems like im putting in all the work and she won't open up to me at all whatsoever. i'm really not sure what to do. im polite, courteous, try not to fight with her, and try to give her as much space as possible. i feel like im running out of things to do, and say, and that she is slowly slipping away from me. she seems more concerned about her friends than me. which is fine, but, she should spend at least a little time with me, right? please post back. thankyou for reading. -L:love:
donnist Posted June 12, 2008 Posted June 12, 2008 Who knows what is going through her mind... Maybe when you came back into her life she realized either you or she is not the same person as before and there's no longer that spark. Maybe the time apart killed the "lust adrenaline" that it sounds like you two had. In my opinion: It all happened so fast.... The hidden feeling of doing something wrong makes it more exciting. You sound like a nice guy... very thoughtful and caring... but you're not thinking about the most important person... yourself. Your feelings are getting stronger and desperate and hers more firm and cold. Don't set yourself up for this one.
Author littletegls Posted June 12, 2008 Author Posted June 12, 2008 it seems like she wants to work on the situation but at the same time tells me its "impossible" to fix things & change back, and says she will "try" but never gets around it. although it hurts, maybe it would be better to just leave her alone, maybe, she will realize what she is losing and eventually make an effort. unfortunately, by the time she might decide to do this, it might be too late. any other opinions? im trying to get as much feedback as possible here
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