winst Posted June 12, 2008 Posted June 12, 2008 Hello all, I've been browsing the posts here and you guys are full of great insight! I was wondering if someone could help me deal with this (i hope its not too long).. My bf and I were together for 7 months (he liked me for 8 years before that but was too shy). We were the perfect couple, our relationship was like a romance film. The only issue that hes 4 hours away (he's in school, I work) but our parent live 20 min away from each other, so for 7 months we saw each other at least every other weekend. He seemed to be fine with this. About two months ago he got into a lot of stress at school and started going home without seeing me. I was a little sad about this at which point he said that he's not making me happy and maybe we should break up. I said maybe (I was really sad) but after a day realized I was stupid and said, no way, I'd rather be with you. I started calling him more to be supportive of his problems but he was just cold/distant so after another few weeks I asked if he wants to be with me, and he said, I'm busy I cant deal with you now. So I broke up with him b/c it was the only way I could get his attention and it worked because after I did and told him that I felt uncared for, his response was about how much he likes me, so much, but hes so afraid and cant deal with the distance/possibility of losing me, he doesnt know how to deal. So I tried to be supportive again.. he went distant. I stopped.. again he started telling me how much he needs me/is confused, etc. I kept texting/calling (I know I shouldnt have) to find out what was going on with him, why all of a sudden of talking for hours to me every day he didnt want to deal with me at all. Every time he answered me but its the same story over and over again. After two months of this I got fed up and asked him to give me some of my stuff back. He wouldnt do it until I showed up at his house. At which point he became incredibly nervous, made a rediculous amount of small talk, and then when I was leaving, made a point to tell me that he really DOES like me, he just doesnt know how to deal with it. So I thought I'd try one more time and I sent him an email telling him that maybe he should focus on the good things about our relationship rather than the distance, its not that long term. No response.. Please help... I dealing with the NC as a permanent break and its breaking my heart. I've let him go, I made the decision not to contact him again, but can anyone offer me any insight into this guys head? Is it really over or does he just need some time or what? Is there anything I can still do to salvage this? Maybe from a guys perspective.. Thanks
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