americanrevgirl Posted June 11, 2008 Posted June 11, 2008 I have an interview today for a position that may mean a significant move. I have recently encountered an old flame, who lives in the state next to me. Things are heating up, and going very well. I am having some significant feelings for this person. Our situation right now is manageable. However, if offered a position, that would mean a huge distance that could kill any future developments for us. Has anyone else been in this situation? I feel stuck, like I don't know what to do. Both the job and the developing relationship are equally important to me.
NeverLetMeDownAgain Posted June 11, 2008 Posted June 11, 2008 A couple of questions for you: I have an interview today for a position that may mean a significant move. - Is this, as they say in The Godfather, "an offer you can't refuse"? Does the position involve a huge raise in salary or benefits that you probably won't receive elsewhere? - Is this position in a specialized field of work, something that you've been specially trained for and just doesn't come along every day? I have recently encountered an old flame, who lives in the state next to me. Things are heating up, and going very well. I am having some significant feelings for this person. Our situation right now is manageable. - How long have you have feelings for said old flame? How long have you been separated? - Is your old flame open to relocation in time? Does he have kids or other obligations that would make that possibility nil?
Lucky_One Posted June 11, 2008 Posted June 11, 2008 Usually old flames are old for a reason. Why did you break up in the first place? I am of the opinion to not put your life on hold for a short dating R. Most BF/GF things end. You have your future to think about, and the world is full of guys.
Author americanrevgirl Posted June 11, 2008 Author Posted June 11, 2008 Well, with the career I have, usually I can get a position anywhere. Just kind of hard where I am right now. It does have somewhat better pay/benefits, and might mean a move overseas which has always been a goal & dream of mine. He is not in a position to move. No kids, anything like that but his career is staying right where it's at. He is older than I am. I dated him while I was in college, he was in the military & had to move away. He was moving towards the marriage thing, I didn't want to quit school to go with him. We lost touch over the years, and recently he got in contact with my brother to get up with me. Things are going well. I just feel in such a catch 22!
BillClam Posted June 21, 2008 Posted June 21, 2008 Wow, strange how the tables seemed to have turned after all these years huh? I mean, not to be cruel, you seem pretty cool about the break up, and now you're in relative proximity to a guy you once had a thing for. It really sucks though, the whole "relationships based on convenience" thing, I mean, if most LDR's had their way, I'm sure we'd all live in the same small town! So yeah, you're in a tricky spot, start up something or leave it? Have you had a few casual visits with the person at the most?
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