Sand&Water Posted June 10, 2008 Posted June 10, 2008 Still trying to figure out WHY a Guy would say this to a Girl? Basically, guy and girl have had a rocky past with dating and hooking up. Things don't work out for the best, and they remain friends. Not very close friends, but just friends -or some version of acquaintances. Several months go by, where few words are exchanged, and guy suddenly contacts girl to tell her that he's always wanted and wished he would have made love to her, that they had a good connection and that it may have landed both into a relationship. More so, that he doesn't want some cheap girl off the streets, he wants a genuine and meaningful one -and that he didn't know why he didn't get intimate with her at the very start and missed out on that chance. Can someone explain what this guy is thinking? (1) Is he telling this because he wants her back? He wants a second chance? (2) Does he just want some lovin', a fling maybe, so he's resorting to her? (3) Is he in love with her? (4) Why would he say this to her? (5) Should she take him seriously, or is he playing mind games? I would really like some answers to this situation. I don't think this guy is using much logic. This whole situation just doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me. Thanks. Sand&Water
daphne Posted June 11, 2008 Posted June 11, 2008 I think there are too many questions there. The guy sounds flakey, and almost as if he's asking for another chance. However, I suspect that underneath he simply wishes he had had sex with the person. He pretty much made that the focal point by bringing it up after the fact.
Author Sand&Water Posted June 12, 2008 Author Posted June 12, 2008 RE: I'm not entirely sure, Daphne. Can you expand on what you said? Perhaps you maybe right, but this guy seems as though hasn't moved on or let go of this girl. He kept on saying that he doesn't want a lusty relationship; none of that short fling stuff during the summer time. That's why it was unexpected, for him to come out and say that ..knowing that the girl and guy had closed off the idea of romance together. Any input would be much appreciated. Sand&Water
missdeathwish Posted June 12, 2008 Posted June 12, 2008 /If they've both decided that they don't want to date or be FWB, hold him to his word and assume he's simply expressing a regret. Or ask him directly what his purpose in bringing it up was.
SpikeyChick Posted June 12, 2008 Posted June 12, 2008 Still trying to figure out WHY a Guy would say this to a Girl? Sand&Water Why not just ASK him ? He alone knows his own reasons- nobody here has any insight into him motivations for writing you...so go ask HIM.
nicki Posted June 12, 2008 Posted June 12, 2008 I don't know, if it were me, I would interpret what he said to be: "I wish we had slept together. I don't want to have sex with some random (cheap) woman who might have an STD. I know who you are. I'm also going to throw the idea of a relationship in here so you don't think I only want to have sex with you, but that's all I really want." Maybe I'm being cynical here. I just don't think a guy who wants a relationship would bring up the sex thing as his main point or regret. Really, if a guy said that to me, I'd dismiss him entirely.
daphne Posted June 13, 2008 Posted June 13, 2008 It would help to know why it didn't work out. However, like Nicki said, since his main point was about how he regretted he didn't sleep with her early on when he had the chance tells me that it's his focal point. A guy seriously interested in a second chance would be talking about the qualities he likes in the person. Not how he feels he missed out on sleeping with her. I really didn't like the tone of how he put it at all. Sounds like he got to see what was out there, then realized that maybe she'd do for a relationship. But not necessarily what he's looking for. I'd steer clear of that because it's misleading and I don't think his intentions are honorable. There's a different ring to it when a guy has had a chance to see what's out there and says "damn, what was I thinking. this girl was what I wanted all along." What you described isn't it. Sounds like he was trying to talk himself into what he considers settling because it was good enough. Just not the best.
carhill Posted June 15, 2008 Posted June 15, 2008 I would really like some answers to this situation. I don't think this guy is using much logic. This whole situation just doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me. Telemarketer response. *click* Second the drunk-dial hypothesis...
DunnoWhat Posted June 15, 2008 Posted June 15, 2008 this sounds like a drunk dial to me...... That could be the answer. It's amazing what a few drinks will do to you. I actually think it isn't at all about sex. He liked the girl and maybe didn't think too much of her but after having a few bad experiances with women he suddenly sees the girl in a new way and sees that she has a bit of class etc which other women don't have.. I doubt it's for sex!
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