borelandkaren Posted June 9, 2008 Posted June 9, 2008 ;)After months of no contact and heaps of personal change, do we really think we could walk back into any of the relationships that we had and be accepting of them. I know personally, that I've got too much inner strength now for my ex to cope with me. He simply wouldn't be able to cope with me saying NO to him but that would be the major word I think I'd use in relation to him. He was a bully, liar, thief, etc and in the time I've been away, I've taken on a very different and more moral persona than I had when I was with him. And I'm happier now with the person I am than who I was. I miss him, sure but I think this is more about familiarity than anything else. Anyone else feel the same way?
foxh1234 Posted June 9, 2008 Posted June 9, 2008 ;)After months of no contact and heaps of personal change, do we really think we could walk back into any of the relationships that we had and be accepting of them. I know personally, that I've got too much inner strength now for my ex to cope with me. He simply wouldn't be able to cope with me saying NO to him but that would be the major word I think I'd use in relation to him. He was a bully, liar, thief, etc and in the time I've been away, I've taken on a very different and more moral persona than I had when I was with him. And I'm happier now with the person I am than who I was. I miss him, sure but I think this is more about familiarity than anything else. Anyone else feel the same way? I dream that we could be together again and have it like it used to be, but it is sadly just a dream. So much has happened and she is a different person. I ran in to her by accident after not seeing her for 5-6 weeks and it was like talking to a stranger. It was the worst feeling. I felt so uncomfortable around the person that only weeks earlier knew me better than any person on earth. That really hit me hard and I realized then that there is no going back. Breaking up is such a sad f**cking thing, I wouldn't wish this pain on my worst enemy.
Template Posted June 9, 2008 Posted June 9, 2008 It really depends on the person I think. Whether in a relationship or out of one, we all evolve as people. We grow and we get stronger and we improve (at least I hope we do). I know that I am a far more stronger person today than when I was with any of my exes. Would I discount getting back with an ex? I wouldn't say that it would never happen, but the chances are highly unlikely. I firmly believe I can be friends with them, but a lot of time its their hangups that prevent it so.
sunshinegirl Posted June 9, 2008 Posted June 9, 2008 After months of no contact and heaps of personal change, do we really think we could walk back into any of the relationships that we had and be accepting of them. In looking back at my breakups prior to this one... for the most part no. First and second boyfriends, no chance. I have changed far too much for there ever to be a fit anymore. Third boyfriend? We are still friends. He was always very good to me and still cares for me a lot, of that I'm sure. If I could somehow make myself be physically attracted to him? Maybe. But as it is, I think we are destined to have a platonic friendship, nothing more. My current ex? I think he would have to do heaps of personal growth for us to 'work' together. As I wrote in the coping board today, I would see our future together playing out in a very bleak and unhappy way. That being said, I still have my pangs of missing him and us and our comfort and routine. I'm not healed yet!
kizik Posted June 9, 2008 Posted June 9, 2008 So much has happened and she is a different person. I ran in to her by accident after not seeing her for 5-6 weeks and it was like talking to a stranger. It was the worst feeling. I felt so uncomfortable around the person that only weeks earlier knew me better than any person on earth. That really hit me hard and I realized then that there is no going back. Breaking up is such a sad f**cking thing, I wouldn't wish this pain on my worst enemy. Thanks for stating this so well, fox. It strengthens my desire NOT to see my ex, because she would be so weird with me. No more smiles or hugs. All gone. You're right, I wouldn't wish this on anyone. PS. Played that open mic tonight, did well, but was by myself. Ohh. Solitude certainly sucks.
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