broncos23 Posted June 7, 2008 Posted June 7, 2008 So basically I'll just summarize what happened between my ex girlfriend and me. We were together for about a year and 6 months when she broke up with me. However, we were already fighting for like 2 months straight. The fights would be over stupid stuff but we just fought every single day. Eventually she said she couldn't take it anymore and I didn't blame her for it. We still "talked" and pretty much acted like we were going out, even went to prom together, but just without the title of boyfriend/girlfriend. It was our Jr. prom and she had been asked to go to Sr. prom with this other kid. She said yes, though I previously told her I wouldn't think it would be such a good idea. She went to prom weekend with her friends and this and that. When she came back I knew she was different. I knew something was going on with a kid, who called himself my friend. I confronted her about it and she denied anything was going on several times. Later thought she did admit that she had a crush on him. Ever since that, which was like 1 month ago she has been hanging out with him and her new friends. It seems like she left all her friends behind just to be with the upper class men. I went over one day I guess for closure and she just started crying her eyes out, telling me how she still loves me and she still hasn't move on. However she was like I can't be with you right now. I asked her about the kid and she said she wanted nothing from him and that she wasn't looking for a relationship from anyone. She told me she was trying to figure stuff out. At school I see her laughing and smiling, which is fine don't get me wrong it's not like I want her stuck in a room crying her eyes out. I just don't understand after the year and a half and plus the months before we were friends how she could just move on so quickly with this new kid. My friends tell me that they hang out pretty much every single day. I've made some mistakes by trying to talk to her but I also been looking at the other forums and they basically say to stay away and I have been doing that. At school I don't walk to her classes anymore and I see her a couple of times in the halls but I never look at her. A couple of days ago she tells me that I need to go get help because I got angry at some kid who was talking ***** about how I got no game and the other kid does, basically b.s. She was like "You shouldn't get this way and that I need to talk to someone." I told her i just use everything for motivation, just the type of person I am. Football season is around the corner and theres nothing better than those Friday night lights for me. I told her that I'm glad she cares but I handle things different and I wish her good luck on her cheerleading tryouts, and then walk away. I'm figuring since there is not much of the school year left I can try to minimize contact and once the summer comes around it will be a lot easier because I know she will be hanging out with different people than I do. I just don't understand how one side she still cares, I mean her room is still the same with all the pictures of us up and everything just in place, but yet she still likes this kid and doing **** with him. Should I keep ignoring her, even though I feel like it's only going to pull us farther? Plus that kid is going to be a freshman at college. I don't think he would want to be tied down for his first year. I just really don't know what to do. I still love her of course and it's not like I don't go out and have fun because I do. I meet new girls and talk to them which is nice but I just don't see anything in them. Plus I just don't do stuff with them just to get her jealous because that's not me. I guess I still respect her. I don't get how she just pushes me off to the side after everything we've been through to be with some other kid who I'm pretty sure just wants one thing. I just have this feeling that if I don't talk to her it will only make it worse and be so far apart that there will never be a second chance. But I also feel like after everything she has done even if she does come back there can't be a second a chance. I feel like I'm stuck in the middle. Like I'm still stuck in the past and she's moved on. I don't know if I made my questions clear anything but anything at this point would really help me see things more clearly. Thanks.
0hpenelope Posted June 7, 2008 Posted June 7, 2008 NC, bro. She needs to figure out what she wants. She can't have her cake and eat it, too. Being around her just adds to her confusion and she's not clear-headed enough about what she wants. She knows you're around, though, in case things don't work out with that chump. You do have one thing concrete in your grasp: she couldn't take it anymore and a break-up did happen. I've learned to filter out the ambiguous stuff (ie. my personal opinion: BF/GF without a title = bullsh*t to me. Life gets tough enough already, I don't need that kind of b.s. in my life.) and hold on to what I know I heard from his mouth. Likewise, you can do anything and everything together but the fact still remains that there was a break-up that happened and she hasn't said anything that tells you clearly "I made a mistake. Can we try again?" She can say all of the "I miss you, I still have feelings for you" lines that she wants, but she hasn't said "Let's try again." Games. Girls can play these games as well as guys can. Of course... NC's risk is she'll pull away from you completely. In your opinion she's worth the pursuit, sure - but how much will it cost you? People have gone to the extremes for love and one of the things that's most prominent in every and all cases of break-ups is that the heartbroken neglect themselves for a time. Fortunately, most recover from that neglect - and a few stay stuck and waste away. NC. Heal yourself. And in your future posts, can you please separate your thoughts in paragraphs? I'm sure that there are other LS users who would like to offer some help to you, but an entire block of text is an eyesore - and there are some who don't have the patience for such translation work. Thank you!
Author broncos23 Posted June 7, 2008 Author Posted June 7, 2008 Hey, thanks for answering and the advice. I'm kind of new here so I really didn't know but I made a new thread and broke it up into thoughts so maybe other people could read it too. Is there a way to delete this thread so others can see the new one? Thanks for your help.
0hpenelope Posted June 7, 2008 Posted June 7, 2008 The only people who can delete threads are the moderators of the board. I'm pretty sure of this. I saw that you made a new thread, though, so perhaps if they see that the 2nd thread is a duplicate of this thread, they'll delete this one.
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