Mary3 Posted June 9, 2008 Posted June 9, 2008 A agree.. then do as Tan suggested and touch his penis .. trust me.. he won't stop you If the chemistry is there then all it needs is a push.. or touch haha ! ............
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted June 9, 2008 Posted June 9, 2008 So sometimes, we're on facebook at the same time in our respective rooms at the hotel, and he never messages me. Does that mean he's not interested? A lot of people don't know you can chat on Facebook. Why don't you try to chat first? Say "hi, I saw you were online. What's up?" If you feel comfortable. If you feel like you've been making a lot of effort lately, you could hold out on that for a bit.
Author spookie Posted June 9, 2008 Author Posted June 9, 2008 A lot of people don't know you can chat on Facebook. Why don't you try to chat first? Say "hi, I saw you were online. What's up?" If you feel comfortable. If you feel like you've been making a lot of effort lately, you could hold out on that for a bit. I did message him once, though. It was about going out to eat with him and his roommate. He responded, but hasn't initiated any conversations since. Whatever. I still think he's incredibly hot, but I don't think he likes me, and I'm over it. On the other hand... I have this feeling, in my gut. That he does. And my gut instincts are never wrong about these things. Even at the strip club, when I was completely smashed, no one ever surprised me. And real life isn't that different. Am I being hopeful, or delusional? I know no one can answer that. I'm just going to try to get him wasted again tomorrow. And maybe stay more sober this time.
Nemo Posted June 9, 2008 Posted June 9, 2008 I still think he's incredibly hot, It's waaaay too early to be drawing any conclusions. You will be in each other's pockets for a few months at least, and there will be lots of opportunities for him to jump all over you. I think he wants to wind you up until you can't take any more, and then reap the benefits. Cruel, but one has to admire the strategy.
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted June 9, 2008 Posted June 9, 2008 My gut instincts are usually never wrong, either. It sounds like he has the hots for you but something is holding him back. What that is, however, could be anything. Sounds interesting, though. At least your job is livened up a bit, no? God, there is no one hot in my office. NO ONE. Have fun!
Nemo Posted June 9, 2008 Posted June 9, 2008 God, there is no one hot in my office. NO ONE. Yes, I know exactly what you mean! I absolutely hate places that hire on merit. What are they thinking??!!
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted June 9, 2008 Posted June 9, 2008 Yes, I know exactly what you mean! I absolutely hate places that hire on merit. What are they thinking??!! Yeah, don't they know I would be so much more productive and happy I would be if I had someone to flirt with all day????
Nemo Posted June 9, 2008 Posted June 9, 2008 Yeah, don't they know I would be so much more productive and happy I would be if I had someone to flirt with all day???? Eye candy is motivational. Flirting with eye candy is the icing on the motivational cake.
Sand&Water Posted June 9, 2008 Posted June 9, 2008 RE: I understand you're really into him, Spookie, but I think you should wait and give him, and this entire situation a bit more time. What's wrong with a little patience? Patience in good. Plus, perhaps he's somewhat uncomfortable expressing himself in this environment and to you. I'm sure in due time, events will unfold and before you know it, you'll have the opportunity to take him into your arms and talk to each other. If you're really keen on getting together with him, then just go with flow of life with him in tow, and let fate take it's course. Sand&Water
Nemo Posted June 9, 2008 Posted June 9, 2008 RE: I understand you're really into him, Spookie, but I think you should wait and give him, and this entire situation a bit more time. What's wrong with a little patience? Patience in good. Plus, perhaps he's somewhat uncomfortable expressing himself in this environment and to you. I'm sure in due time, events will unfold and before you know it, you'll have the opportunity to take him into your arms and talk to each other. If you're really keen on getting together with him, then just go with flow of life with him in tow, and let fate take it's course. Sand&Water Great post! Yes, vaginal patience is a virtue, indeed.
Author spookie Posted June 9, 2008 Author Posted June 9, 2008 RE: I understand you're really into him, Spookie, but I think you should wait and give him, and this entire situation a bit more time. What's wrong with a little patience? Patience in good. Plus, perhaps he's somewhat uncomfortable expressing himself in this environment and to you. I'm sure in due time, events will unfold and before you know it, you'll have the opportunity to take him into your arms and talk to each other. If you're really keen on getting together with him, then just go with flow of life with him in tow, and let fate take it's course. Sand&Water I think you're right. It's only been a little more than a week since I first met him, after all. And with how much more complicated things would become if we did hook up, it would probably be wise to get to know him a little better even if I did know for sure he was interested. Ok guys. I'm going to chill out now.
shadowplay Posted June 9, 2008 Posted June 9, 2008 I've been in ambiguous situations like yours, Spook. Based on my experience he's attracted to you but is hesitant to make a move because of some or all of the below: 1) He's not entirely sure that you like him and is afraid to make a move. 2) He thinks you might not have much in common. 3) He doesn't want to create an awkward work situation. 4) Depending on how conservative he is personality wise, he may be creeped out by the fact that you seem like a lush. My advice: focus on getting to know him better. Ask him questions about himself and reveal stuff about you. Share likes and dislikes. Talking over im is a good pressure-free way to get to know someone better. That's how my bf and I became better acquainted after meeting in a class. Send him links to music you like, things you find funny. Talk about yourself and make yourself sound interesting. Stop getting drunk in front of him because it makes you look bad. Your wild behavior might be intimidating to him. Obviously I don't know how you come off in person, but I have a hunch you might swear a lot...and by your own admission you drink a lot. So I would try to tone that stuff down. Hey, I'm not judging you -- I'm no saint -- but I know a lot of guys can be judgmental about stuff like that.
Prodigal Princess Posted June 10, 2008 Posted June 10, 2008 Don't drink so much, don't swear too much, stop being belligerent... God. Everyone here seems to think this will help you nab the dude. Maybe it will. And where to from there? You'll have to watch yourself for the rest of the relationship. I've toned down my personality (read: partying) for guys in the past and it never works in the long run. The real me always came out eventually leading to a messy ending. You should be with someone who has the balls to handle you when you're drunk, not some fairy who gets scared when you say something politically incorrect. You also deserve someone who likes you enough to take a risk and ask you out. Unfortunately I don't think is guy is worthy.
Nemo Posted June 10, 2008 Posted June 10, 2008 I've toned down my personality Spookie can definitely learn from this. Guys definitely prefer girls without a personality, and who are too busy having sex to ever think about acquiring one. The real me always cameMuch better than the fake you always pretending. eventually leading to a messy ending.Sometimes faking it is more convenient - sure, but it is a whole lot less fun. The messier the better. You should be with someone who has the balls to handle yoDefinitely. Girls love to handle those balls, yo.
Author spookie Posted June 11, 2008 Author Posted June 11, 2008 Well, the plot sort-of thickens... Last night after work three of us were sitting around the foyer, drinking complimentary hotel beer, when Lauren, who broke up with her bf on Sunday, turned to me, while Aaron was in the bathroom, and said, "OMG I can't believe I'm single! I need a boyfriend!" They spent the rest of the night flirting. I could tell she, like me, was entranced as he expertly took our bathroom door off its hinges, for a makeshift beerpong table; turned on when he got every single ball in, though he was drunk. Watching her talk to him about their small-town pasts, I started feeling pretty sorry for myself. I mean, on my good days, I know I'm smart and nice and funny; but she's all those things too, and she spends about 4 hours getting ready each morning while I sleep in so while we we're both pretty (in the same way, I might add) she ends up hotter. And she has better clothes but not the shady past. I know, overall, she's a much better catch. But today... we all went out to lunch with one of our bosses, and whole time, sitting on opposites sides of the table, Aaron and I would catch each other's gaze and crack up. And this evening, we all went down to eat and drink again, but only we were talking, and eventually everyone else left and we spent six hours alone, watching a basketball game and just kidding around. I got to know him much better, and it was really fun! But I still don't know. Does he like me? If we weren't some of each other's only company around here, it would be more clear. I'd say yes. But as it is, on the one hand, I think, if he didn't like me, he wouldn't have hung out for me that long, and he woudln't have been so open, and so friendly. But if he did, he'd have made a move, right? He'd have invited me to come to his room to watch a movie or something (though I suppose we should be going to bed). So which is it?
johan Posted June 11, 2008 Posted June 11, 2008 I think you just need to give it time. If there is real potential there, the mutual kind, then something will happen. If there isn't, then it's better if nothing happens. You have plenty of time to spend together getting to know each other. It kind of sounds like an MTV show.
Storyrider Posted June 11, 2008 Posted June 11, 2008 I think you just need to give it time. If there is real potential there, the mutual kind, then something will happen. If there isn't, then it's better if nothing happens. You have plenty of time to spend together getting to know each other. It kind of sounds like an MTV show. Ha. Actuaries: The Reality Show
Author spookie Posted June 11, 2008 Author Posted June 11, 2008 I think you just need to give it time. If there is real potential there, the mutual kind, then something will happen. If there isn't, then it's better if nothing happens. You have plenty of time to spend together getting to know each other. It kind of sounds like an MTV show. It kind of feels like an MTV show. As an aside, I'm getting wrinkles from laughing so much. I think this is the funniest summer of my life. I had no idea actuaries were so awesome.
Author spookie Posted June 11, 2008 Author Posted June 11, 2008 On Friday Lauren is going out of town for the weekend. Aaron and I want to explore Chicago. Brad does not. It might be perfect?
Nemo Posted June 11, 2008 Posted June 11, 2008 Aaron and I want to explore Chicago. Make sure that he stops to smell your roses.
jerbear Posted June 11, 2008 Posted June 11, 2008 On Friday Lauren is going out of town for the weekend. Aaron and I want to explore Chicago. Brad does not. It might be perfect? Sounds like fun! Remember to get local pizza and oneday try Pizzaria Uno.
Hotel Paradiso Posted June 11, 2008 Posted June 11, 2008 I hate to say this but jsut because the other interns haven't noticed an obvious attraction by your crush doesn't mean he doesn't have a crush on you. I know you like to think that everyone notices you, and everything you do, but did you think that these people really weren't taking note of the time you were talking to him or whatever? Sorry if this blows your ego. NOT EVERYONE NOTICES THESE THINGS ABOUT YOU, PEOPLE HAVE OTHER THINGS IN THEIR LIVES TO NOTICE, THEY AREN'T NOTICING EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU. I really have to agree with this. I know I'm slightly older and more jaded, but since SO MANY WOMEN these days love to string along guys they could care less about just for the ego stroke, I never, ever, ever give a woman a sign unless she gives one first (and even that can be BS), even if I'm crazy about the girl. Oh, I might spend time with her and try to make a decent impression, but I'm not going to give a single obvious sign just for her to get some kick from it, leaving me hanging in the wind, like so many others have done to me in the past. What I'm getting it is that you ladies have sort of destroyed 'the rules' so you had better not expect men to follow them anymore. If even most women who showed interest in me actually had it, I'd give it, since it would be mutually understood and everything would work out. But, seeing that it's not the case, I'm not going to give you any signs unless you give them first. Bottom line: He still may be interested. Being obvious (like a complement or physical touch (and I'm not talking his parts)) is the only way he'll really know if you're interested. And, remember it's still somewhat taboo to date co-workers (I know I don't), so he's going to be a bit cautious, even if he IS interested in you...
Mary3 Posted June 11, 2008 Posted June 11, 2008 Make sure that he stops to smell your roses. woooooooo !
Author spookie Posted June 12, 2008 Author Posted June 12, 2008 Blah. I think today's Lauren's day. I pasted on 5 inches of makeup AND straightened my hair, but she still managed to out-do me by doing all that AND dressing like a total whore. They sat across from each other at "dinner" (aka drinks) and he laughed at all her jokes. I'm feeling sort-of suicidal.
shadowplay Posted June 12, 2008 Posted June 12, 2008 Blah. I think today's Lauren's day. I pasted on 5 inches of makeup AND straightened my hair, but she still managed to out-do me by doing all that AND dressing like a total whore. They sat across from each other at "dinner" (aka drinks) and he laughed at all her jokes. I'm feeling sort-of suicidal. I hope you're not serious. Ok, I'll admit I've been there before with guys. Why do you think this guy would be impressed by girls sluttin' it up? Most guys prefer natural, easy kind of beauty. You have to make it look effortless. Maybe you should tell Lauren you're crushing on this guy so she backs off. If she does know then it's sort of bitchy for her to be blatantly flirting with him. If I were you, I'd just beat her to the punch by asking him out or telling him you like him. It's fast and easy.
Recommended Posts