Attempting to be responsible

[sedgwick]

I wanted to let everyone here know that I do realize how irrational I've been and I do appreciate all your help. The encouragement you guys have given me -- as well as the kicks in the ass to do something about the way I feel -- led me to go back to DBT. I didn't want to say anything until I was sure I could get into this program but I found out this morning it was approved and I have an appointment next week. I went to the hospital to do all the labs (they make you do a full blood/urine workup if you're already on meds just to make sure your liver/kidneys/thyroid are okay) and I'm about to schedule a visit with my regular doctor for a physical (they make you do that too.) I dealt with some issues I was having with my insurance as well. This is less intensive than the DBT program I did before but more intensive than the once-every-two-weeks therapy I'm doing now.

 

So. I did it. I took care of myself, and I'm happy about it. I meet my new shrink next Thursday. I really feel like I took a major step toward better health, and I hope my doing this will inspire those of you who are considering therapy to do it.

 

Now off to yoga. I recommend that too.

 

-Sedgiepoo

[motive2002]

I think I gave you a swift kick in one of your threads, but that's only because I really like you, Sedg

 

I hope whatever this therapy you're undertaking helps you out. I'd like to see you get better. You have so much going for you, I'd hate to see you waste any more time being unhappy.

 

~motive

[sedgwick]

Thank you Motive. :bunny:

 

I would just like for everyone to note that right here on your very internet is an example of a borderline person choosing to take care of her mental health and that we do have it in us to make the right choices!! Borderlines can get better!!! It's not hopeless! Okay? Okay!!

[Crestfallen_KH]

*Applause*

 

This is wonderful, Sed. Thanks for sharing this with us. It was getting so painful to read and reread the same basic thread over and over again (theme: I'm unworthy, I suck, and he's forgotten about me).

 

None of us - strangers - have ever believed this. And I hope these actions and people help you to stop believing that same basic theme too.

 

Best of luck. Let us know how it goes.

[carrotgirl]

SEDGWICK!!!!

 

You are WONDERFUL! Tremendous news. In case you don't hear it enough, it's always true; I have so much admiration for you and the way you have been taking care of yourself all along.

 

Think about it... You seem to deal about the same as the rest of us and knowing you're borderline, that's like you being light years ahead of the rest of us in human(e) evolution!

 

Brava!

Carrot

[sedgwick]

Thanks guys. I'll always take encouragement and applause.

 

I'm actually really excited about this because it's a teaching hospital where they're doing a lot of intensive study of BPD. The doctor I'm seeing is one of the leading researchers of the disorder. As such, they do a whole neurological workup on you too. They don't just do DBT, they combine several forms of treatment. I like thinking that maybe by getting treatment at this place, I'll teach someone something that will make a difference in treating BPD in the future. The more we learn about it, the more we can demystify it, and the closer we can get to figuring out what's really going on inside the brain that makes it happen.

 

Is it weird to say that going into this therapy gives me a sense of purpose?

[foxh1234]

BRAVO !!!! Way to go Sedge!! We will all beat this damn thing called love. Thanks also for all the great responses you have given me.

[Nevermind]

That's amazing, sedge. I am so glad!

 

(Sorry, if I gave you a kick sometimes.)

[borelandkaren]

Good Girl!!! Don't let that skinny little **** beat you!!

[Kamille]

That's fantastic news Sedg!

 

And like Claudia Schiffer loved to say: you're worth it.

[LikeCharlotte]

I'm so happy for you. I'm glad you took this step. I cant wait to hear from the heathy new sedj. I like this one lots too though.