kizik Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 So I've been giving the dating websites a go... it's kind of lame, frustrating and exhausting though. 1) Are there only "weirdos" on the dating sites? 2) Anybody ever had any luck with them? Thanks for your time.
Leia Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 I think you'd get more response if you started this on the Dating board.
0hpenelope Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 Aaaaargh!!!!!! Nooooooo.....!!!!!!!!! Actually, I don't know about these matching sites. Whenever I see an ad on TV, I tell my friends "I would like to tell my grandchildren a better story than 'I met your grandfather on the internet'." I'm not raining on success stories from these sites. My bias against dating sites stems from my inherent suspicion of the internet. I take everything I see and read on the 'net with a grain of salt - unless I'm on online databases for research projects and whatnot. If the eHarmony or Match.com or whatever dating service you use works out, good for you kizik!
LikeCharlotte Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 I'd never do it but whatever works for you. I like to look someone in the eye when I decide to be attracted to them. It takes me awhile to warm up and want to date. Thats just me. If you can do it why not try?
Nemo Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 I like to look someone in the eye when I decide to be attracted to them. So, let's get this straight. You "decide" to be attracted to somebody, and then you give them the "resistance is futile" stare?! Dude, I must remember not to mess with you.
LikeCharlotte Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 So, let's get this straight. You "decide" to be attracted to somebody, and then you give them the "resistance is futile" stare?! Dude, I must remember not to mess with you. I think attraction is a decision for me. Attraction is not instant for me, ever. I'm irresistible Borg chick... *stare* want to be 6 of 10?
justaman99 Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 So I've been giving the dating websites a go... it's kind of lame, frustrating and exhausting though. 1) Are there only "weirdos" on the dating sites? 2) Anybody ever had any luck with them? Thanks for your time. 1. Yes there are plenty of weirdos! Women need to keep their guard up. 2. Yes I have had success in the sense of meeting some decent people. It's nice to get out there and meet people. Can't say I'm ready for anything real serious yet because I'm just not there yet but it's been a positive experience so far for me. -Just
v33 Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 Dude, yes. There is absolutely nothing wrong with getting on an online dating site to meet women. In this day and age, especially for those of us who aren't clubbers or teenagers, it is a very effective way to meet women. Look at it this way, any girl on there is looking to meet someone. Beats trying to pick someone up at a bar for sure. My only advice would be to be very honest about yourself in your profile, be selective in whom you decide to meet (have a few good phone calls) and meet soon... you risk building someone up to be the person who you want them to be instead of who they are if you have a drawn out email courtship. Getting out and meeting women by any means is a great way to help you get over a break-up. I am not suggesting sex with random girls is needed, but I will tell you that I have been an absolute mess since being broken up with after being cheated on and just today I was approached by two women, one of whom I ended up having a great evening with, and it really helped me see how great it is to be single again. Not having to answer to anyone, the freedom to be yourself and do what you wish. Granted these were encounters that took place in person and had nothing to do with the online world, but you want to give yourself as many options as possible. Hit up those sites and date, date, date!
wowIlose Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 Hmm it didn't work out for me. Than again I only tried out one website, and the options where pretty limited. I came back 6 months later to find out the website had at least 50% of the same women and the rest just didn't match up to my standards. My standards aren't high at all either.. I never ask for something I wouldn't be able to give back or reciprocate. Does this mean you shouldn't try it?? Nope.. go ahead, I still plan on trying other sites in the near future but so far (lavalife) has been a total crap shoot for me.
lovestruck818 Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 So I've been giving the dating websites a go... it's kind of lame, frustrating and exhausting though. 1) Are there only "weirdos" on the dating sites? 2) Anybody ever had any luck with them? Thanks for your time. Anyone who wasn't a "weirdo" would be able to find someone in person...IMO.
sunshinegirl Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 I know several married couples who met online. For sure, there are lots of weirdos. But if you are good at weeding them out, there are some gems in the pile. I dated one guy for a few months and we wound up becoming, and staying, good friends. He is the only man I've dated that I met online - all my other boyfriends were friends or friends-of-friends. Ironically, online dude was the healthiest of all of them.
Lookingforward Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 I've had just as much success with Rs that began online as in "real life" - in fact my very first "online romance" lasted as a 10 year real life R and that was back in the days before the WWW even existed. It's just a matter of being careful, same as meeting in person.
Lookingforward Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 Anyone who wasn't a "weirdo" would be able to find someone in person...IMO. but obviously not THAT person if they were not in their immediate locality........ we already are fully aware of your "views" on online dating (even though you never have)
Art_Critic Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 I know several married couples who met online. Art waves his hand.. I met my wife on match... I did online dating for years.. I had just about every experience you can have ...from pictures not matching and being old to having an xtra 150 lbs of weight been put on since the picture was taken or just being 10-15 years older than they said on their profile. With experience I learned how to figure out the low self esteem, just divorced or undateable in the real world wackos and from there I started dating a good group of dateable women. Then I met my wife...So I'm no longer on match dating...
CaliGuy Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 So I've been giving the dating websites a go... it's kind of lame, frustrating and exhausting though. 1) Are there only "weirdos" on the dating sites? 2) Anybody ever had any luck with them? Thanks for your time. 1) No, we're all weird so that is the norm. 2) Yes and no. Depends. I have used one site in the past and had some success but ultimately I prefer just dating people I have met in the "real" world
D-Lish Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 It's not a yes or no question for me- more of a "why the heck not?" As long as you use common sense and caution- there is nothing wrong with it. You think only "weird people" use the internet??? We all do. I don't know anyone who doesn't use it. Even my 98 year old grandfather used to surf the net before he died...lol. I've met some really decent normal people from online dating... I have also met some creeps and crazies... but guess what? I have met those same kinds of people in real life. They're everywhere! Everyone on this forum is corresponding with strangers... a natural progression if you're single is to put up a dating profile- why not? I am not a teenager or a clubber anymore. I meet guys at the grocery store, the liquor store, at pubs... but I meet them from online too. Just be careful about it- make sure to see lots of pics first, have a good amount of conversation- then meet publiccally if you want to. That's what I like about online dating- I can talk to them or meet them if I want to! It's pretty offensive when people say they think only weird people do the online dating thing! So do only weird people post thier personal stories on a public forum like this? I think not!
D-Lish Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 Anyone who wasn't a "weirdo" would be able to find someone in person...IMO. Hmm, well ... I have two Degrees, two Diplomas, I own my own place and my own car... I come from a wonderful, stable family, have run a business in the past- and I treat everyone I meet with respect and compassion. Too bad by your standards I am weird.
Art_Critic Posted June 3, 2008 Posted June 3, 2008 Anyone who wasn't a "weirdo" would be able to find someone in person...IMO. I don't think I'm a weirdo and have never had a problem getting dates in real life until my life changed as I got older and it didn't revolve around places to meet someone.. ie:.. I bought a log cabin in the mountains.. so if I spent a weekend up there I wasn't near people and and since I would go up there to get rid of my week from work.. presto... I also don't date employees so that leaves work out.. my industry isn't the kind you can date in with success.. Going home after a hard days work meant that I wasn't seeing anybody dateable either.. None of those things makes me a weirdo.. Life has a way of getting in the way of dating... Hell.. It took me 2 days to clean my house.. I live in a fairly large house so when I spent the evening or 2 cleaning I wasn't near dateable people.. Then throw in landscaping and yard work on 2 homes and running a business and there just isn't time to hit the dance clubs to meet those superficial women that exist there.. I guess I could hire a cleaning company and landscapers.. but I like to do yard work and that is how I get exercise to stay fit and healthy.. Are there weirdos online.. sure.. bu this isn't the 80's anymore and there are more weirdos in bars than online today...
motive2002 Posted June 3, 2008 Posted June 3, 2008 35 SWM, Loves Transformers and anything Star Trek related. I live in my Mom's basement where I play video games all day because I'm unemployed. I'm 5'6" with a "little more to love" and my mom says my thick glasses make me look like Geraldo Rivera, except without the mustache. I live here with my 3 hamsters and my wicked antique cereal box collection. (my favorite is the Wheaties box with OJ Simpson on the front) Please live within 3 miles because I can't ride my bike that far without passing out. Hope to hear from you!!
D-Lish Posted June 3, 2008 Posted June 3, 2008 Yeah, I kind of find it insulting when people make a blanket judgement about online daters like that. I'm a normal person with normal problems- good qualities and bad qualities. Having a profile up on lava or POF doesn't make me a weirdo.
northstar1 Posted June 3, 2008 Posted June 3, 2008 So I've been giving the dating websites a go... it's kind of lame, frustrating and exhausting though. 1) Are there only "weirdos" on the dating sites? 2) Anybody ever had any luck with them? Thanks for your time. Hey Kizik It depends - I've tried them in the past. You just have to go into with realistic expecations, such as 1)Most of them are a high guy to girl ratio - so girls get lots of attention/notes - winks etc. It's easy to get frustrated. 2)there are not only weirdos - most i met were decent, fun girls when i was doing it. many are just normal people who are busy with careers, or not into the bar scene etc. 3)you will meet people you have to be prepared that you will not have chemistry in person, even if you seemed to click on the phone/internet. body language/face to face can be very different from the person you were chatting to online. 4)I guess luck is relative. I clicked with a few - had some fun dates, good conversations - but ultimately i didn't end up with the 'right' one. I don't think you have anything to lose - try it out - if you don't like it, nothing lost right? And if you are in a small city, or don't have a big social network to meet people, it can be a good way to do that.
sid3 Posted June 3, 2008 Posted June 3, 2008 Cause for concern? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OK< THIS IS WEIRD< YOUR DATING A WEIRDO< Should I be concerned that my boyfriend has checked his match.com acct in the last 2 weeks? I can't imagine him paying for it again...although he did meet his ex that way. Do you all think it's just harmless browsing or what? He prob. should have de-activated his profile but maybe he didn't realise you could...i dunno. As long as he isn't paying for it again, then no one can contact him, so I guess I am alright with that. What are your feelings on this? WE KNOW YOUR OPINION ON ONLINE DATING >LOVESTRUCK< STOP PUTTING PEOPLE DOWN JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE A CONFLICTING VIEW__________________ "Laughter is the best medicine."~Patch Adams
Author kizik Posted June 3, 2008 Author Posted June 3, 2008 To those who thought I was insulting online daters, I wasn't CALLING them weirdos - I was simply asking if people THOUGHT they were. North, you're very right. The online thing is going frustrating so far, haven't gotten any responses to my "winks." Plus, all of the sites I've checked want to charge you $20. I'm thinking I'll just say f*ck it. I'll meet someone some day, and it'll most likely happen in person.
Recommended Posts