MaxManwell Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 I've been using prostitutes as a substitute for a relationship for nearly two years now the habbit is addicting because the women are very attractive and they lavish me with affection. This started about 2 years ago, I was 23 and having never had a relationship or sex resolved to see a prostitute. Every time I try to break the habbit a few months latter I get desperate and will return it is becoming a part of my lifestyle and an indescribable joy to top of a friday night out on the town. I also look forward to becoming a sleazy old man. Please help me to become normal ** the girls are very well paid, I will pay between $170-$230 for half an hour, of which the girl keeps 70%. I have no sympathy for them so please spare me your arguments.
Walk Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 If you can afford spending $230 bucks every week then whatever. But wow... just on a fiscal view point, that's not a very wise choice of investment for your hard earned dough. How long does it take you to earn $170 - 230 bucks? And you say that only pays for half an hour of the prostitutes time? ouch man. Approximately $700-$1000 bucks a month... for 2 hours of female companionship.
Author MaxManwell Posted May 28, 2008 Author Posted May 28, 2008 I earn $20 an hour 11.5 hours work to afford half an hour. But it is what they're letting me do that makes it worth my while. Because I could not get a girl, working all day doesn't seem like a bad deal when at the end of it I get what I want.These women are gorgeous I couldn't believe it at first but there are a lot of extremely attractive prostitutes. You know when you see a woman that turns heads that all your mates point at, well there are women just like that in brothels who will do what you want for a couple of hundred bucks. It is not so much the money the last time I visited was over a month ago it is the fact that in the time I have been visiting I have not asked anyone out or made any attempt at finding a girl.
Taramere Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 What's the point of this post? MD People can't just write "I need attention - please give generously." There has to be some kind of focal point. My interpretation of the focal point here is "I spend a lot of money on prostitutes. Yay! Help! Discuss!"
Author MaxManwell Posted May 28, 2008 Author Posted May 28, 2008 People can't just write "I need attention - please give generously." There has to be some kind of focal point. My interpretation of the focal point here is "I spend a lot of money on prostitutes. Yay! Help! Discuss!" That is about correct, if you would like to discuss it, you are welcome to start your own thread instead of hi-jacking mine.
Taramere Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 That is about correct, if you would like to discuss it, you are welcome to start your own thread instead of hi-jacking mine. I suppose I could start an alternative "talk about Max's addiction to prostitutes" thread, but it seems a bit unnecessary to have two threads dealing with the same issue. What I gather from your post is that you're not motivated to find a girlfriend because you have the option of paying to have sex with women who are more attractive than the pool of "free" women available to you. You can see a lot of benefits with the status quo. However, three things seem to be troubling you. 1. Visiting prostitutes is costing you a lot of money. 2. You feel that you're developing an addiction - which isn't so great, because having an addiction involves a certain loss of control over your life and can end up taking your life over quite dramatically. 3. You're not motivated to develop a relationship with a woman who'd like and value you enough to give you her time for free (leaving aside the usual argument about who pays for dates etc). Something inside you says that this isn't really a very good state of affairs.
Woggle Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 As long as you can afford go for it. At least with prostitutes you know they don't love you and it is only business. I like the honesty that go with this type of transaction. She says how much it will cost and I make the choice of whether I want to pay it or not unlike wives and girlfriends who use the courts to extort you out of fees you never knew existed. With a hooker if i want something I have to pay but I know that upfront and that is an advantage.
nittygritty Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 As long as you can afford go for it. At least with prostitutes you know they don't love you and it is only business. I like the honesty that go with this type of transaction. She says how much it will cost and I make the choice of whether I want to pay it or not unlike wives and girlfriends who use the courts to extort you out of fees you never knew existed. With a hooker if i want something I have to pay but I know that upfront and that is an advantage. Unless it's illegal where you live and you get arrested.
Woggle Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 Unless it's illegal where you live and you get arrested. This is true but it doesn't stop it plus if a man is smart and keeps it discreet it is pretty easy to get away with it. It should be legalized though.
rproctor Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 What are you doing to yourself man? Think about it... Think about what your doing... Imagine how your true lover will feel when she finds out you have slept with all these whores... Dont you think she will loose respect for you? Dont you worry that the actions you do now will haunt your future? What you are doing is sleazy and in most womens eyes disgusting beyond belief. It shows women that you do not respect them, that you look at them as mere objects of affection... Do you realize that you are forever damaging your future by allowing yourself to fall to this level? Not only that, its unhealthy and very dangerous for your health. You said yourself you are loosing ambition for a real relationship... Do you really want to spend your entire life paying women to be with you? You will never truly know the meaning of love, you will never experience the happiness from having a soul mate... You will always feel empty and alone, without purpose... Is that what you want? Is that how you want to live? All of your life working and giving money away for a few minutes... You will never be able to lay in bed and hold your lover in your arms and sleep with her against your body. You will never be able to look her in the eyes and tell her that you love her, and her tell you... You will never be able to feel the security of a relationship, the great foundation of love and sexuality that comes from your partner... Sex is only sex, but what sex lacks is love... You will spend your whole life having sex with random whores, never able to make love to any of them... You will waste away, empty and alone, wishing that you would have put the effort and money towards a real meaningful relationship. Your legacy will die with you and you will never bare children. You could possibly catch an STD and die a young man. You are destroying yourself greater than you can even see... If I were you, I would stop now, bury this addiction, and change your perspective on women. You have two hands, one to slap yourself with when you do wrong, the other to jerk off with when you require sex. Use them.
whichwayisup Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 I've been using prostitutes as a substitute for a relationship for nearly two years now the habbit is addicting because the women are very attractive and they lavish me with affection. It's all based on her being paid to be affectionate with you, it isn't real or heartfelt. Sure, in the moment it will make you feel good and desired, but you are PAYING for that! After your time is up, she's on to someone else and you're forgotten about. You're setting yourself up, I mean to use them as relationships, well, it AIN'T a relationship, not even close. Find yourself a womam who will love you for free 24/7.
Author MaxManwell Posted May 28, 2008 Author Posted May 28, 2008 What are you doing to yourself man? Think about it... Think about what your doing... Imagine how your true lover will feel when she finds out you have slept with all these whores... Dont you think she will loose respect for you? Dont you worry that the actions you do now will haunt your future? What you are doing is sleazy and in most womens eyes disgusting beyond belief. It shows women that you do not respect them, that you look at them as mere objects of affection... Do you realize that you are forever damaging your future by allowing yourself to fall to this level? Not only that, its unhealthy and very dangerous for your health. You said yourself you are loosing ambition for a real relationship... Do you really want to spend your entire life paying women to be with you? You will never truly know the meaning of love, you will never experience the happiness from having a soul mate... You will always feel empty and alone, without purpose... Is that what you want? Is that how you want to live? All of your life working and giving money away for a few minutes... You will never be able to lay in bed and hold your lover in your arms and sleep with her against your body. You will never be able to look her in the eyes and tell her that you love her, and her tell you... You will never be able to feel the security of a relationship, the great foundation of love and sexuality that comes from your partner... Sex is only sex, but what sex lacks is love... You will spend your whole life having sex with random whores, never able to make love to any of them... You will waste away, empty and alone, wishing that you would have put the effort and money towards a real meaningful relationship. Your legacy will die with you and you will never bare children. You could possibly catch an STD and die a young man. You are destroying yourself greater than you can even see... If I were you, I would stop now, bury this addiction, and change your perspective on women. You have two hands, one to slap yourself with when you do wrong, the other to jerk off with when you require sex. Use them. You're absolutely correct I no longer have the urge to go as often as I once did but I still think about it and how nice it would be to visit. The girls are so beautiful some of them have amazing social skills and are very charming. My bonus is coming up in about a month, for example I was thinking about how to spend it, the intuitive thought was a nice meal, poker and to visit a brothel. All involving women in submissive roles being nice to me for want of money. The normal response to that would be that it would be better to spend the money on a S/O; what is concerning is I do not get that urge or any comfortable feeling from the prospect of it, as I once did. I don't know if it is bitterness or the role prostitutes have played but I fear I have become somewhat calouse. I have already missed out on a lot, the tenderness that is supposedly associated with young love, that entire phase of my life is over without any real relationship unfolding. All I can say now is that my thoughts are blank I do not know what to make of this. I am not some late bloomer college kid I am nearly 25 years old.This is my life and this is a serious dysfunction that I am unable to have an adult relationship.
serial muse Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 So have you ever had sex with anyone else? Or just prostitutes? This started about 2 years ago, I was 23 and having never had a relationship or sex resolved to see a prostitute. Because I could not get a girl, working all day doesn't seem like a bad deal when at the end of it I get what I want. All involving women in submissive roles being nice to me for want of money. The normal response to that would be that it would be better to spend the money on a S/O; what is concerning is I do not get that urge or any comfortable feeling from the prospect of it, as I once did. I don't know if it is bitterness or the role prostitutes have played but I fear I have become somewhat calouse. I have already missed out on a lot, the tenderness that is supposedly associated with young love, that entire phase of my life is over without any real relationship unfolding. These kinds of statements sound to me like you're basically scared of rejection, and you know prostitutes won't reject you.
blind_otter Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 You're absolutely correct I no longer have the urge to go as often as I once did but I still think about it and how nice it would be to visit. The girls are so beautiful some of them have amazing social skills and are very charming. Well, sure. If I was paid for the value of my vagina and my charm, I would definitely be sure to be nice and sexy to any paying customer. It's all about the benjamins. My bonus is coming up in about a month, for example I was thinking about how to spend it, the intuitive thought was a nice meal, poker and to visit a brothel. All involving women in submissive roles being nice to me for want of money. The normal response to that would be that it would be better to spend the money on a S/O; what is concerning is I do not get that urge or any comfortable feeling from the prospect of it, as I once did. If this is truely addictive behavior, you are experiencing what is known as "an increased tolerance". You get accustomed to a certain level of stimulation - then that stimulation is not enough to continue stimulating you, so you move on to the next level - in your case I suppose this would involve sexual fetishes or some kind of specialty. I don't know if it is bitterness or the role prostitutes have played but I fear I have become somewhat calouse. I have already missed out on a lot, the tenderness that is supposedly associated with young love, that entire phase of my life is over without any real relationship unfolding. All I can say now is that my thoughts are blank I do not know what to make of this. I am not some late bloomer college kid I am nearly 25 years old.This is my life and this is a serious dysfunction that I am unable to have an adult relationship. I suggest you seek out some concerted, longterm counseling. It seems that you have a deep-seated fear of intimacy, so you chose to pay for sexual favors rather than risking emotional involvement with someone who has the ability to reject you - hookers will do whatever you want, as long as they get paid. They will pretend to like you and shower you with attention and affection, whereas a real life romantic partner requires some kind of emotional interchange and reciprocation, and even then, it's still iffy as to whether or not they will show you the affection you desire. Addiction, in my book, is addiction no matter what you are addicted to. Some people use videogames, some use work. Some use alcohol and drugs. Some, like you, use prostitutes. In the end, it's about avoiding dealing with reality. You use your drug of choice to numb you to the pain of avoiding reality. You know there is an issue, a problem you need to deal with directly - but you put it off, and use prostitutes instead.
Lizzie60 Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 Come on now.. you're not old.. geeez you're only 25.. the problem with your addiction is that you are young for that kind of addiction.. it could be dangerous in the long run... you might like the 'attention' the great sex, it's all 'fantasy'.. these women DO NOT love you.. they love your cash.. and it's OK.. you know it.. they're not playing you.. you might be playing yourself though.. You might not be able to find a girl for a long term basis because you will always compare this girl to the pros... and she won't make the cut.. I am not saying that it's a bad thing.. but if you replace your relationships with this type of relationships.. then you could be in trouble, financially and psychologically... think about it..
Tomcat33 Posted May 29, 2008 Posted May 29, 2008 Hey Max what I am seeing here, is not so much that you have some fears of commitment or deep seated issues, I simply see ignorance. (I don't mean that in a bashing way I mean you just don't know any better) Here you are a ripe 25 yrs of age, never been with a regular girl be it sexually or in a relationship and you started at the top with these great looking women that most regular guys would only dream of getting and not only do they look great but they are at your beck and call for you to do with them AS YOU PLEASE sexually. I mean what's not to like about this scenario? What is to like about working so hard in trying to get a regular girl? This is what is playing out in your mind and this ALL you know simply because you don't know things any other way. Having no normal point of reference and having started SO at the top under a pretext of pure fantasy leaves you nowhere to go but down. It's time to get your feet back on the ground, I suggest you use that money to get some therapy or join an addiction group in getting help to break this addiction. As others said, you will NEVER get to experience the TRUE pleasure of sex that is born out of love and that is so sad! Unless you let go of this destructive pattern and you snap out of this instant gratification mode you are in and learn to work for what is most rewarding in life you will never grow as an individual. Now if you get to be older and with several real experiences on your belt you feel you are better off paying women to sleep with you instead, then you have every right to choose that lifestyle for yourself that would be an educated choice based not only on experience but also personal growth and advancement. We as humans can only grow through the relationships we have with others and in a romantic setting you get the utmost benefit of exploring yourself in relation to another human being, in other words you find out the most about yourself when you relate to someone romantically long term. If you deprive yourself of this experience you will stunt both your emotional and spirtual growth forever and a man without a soul is like a car without an engine, it may look shiny and fine on the outside but "it ain't goin' nowhere". It would be such a shame if that happened to you. Whatever it is that your are able to do to these women sexually doesn't scratch the surface on how much pleasure you can derive from exploring your sexuality with someone you love and who also genuinely loves you.
Enema Posted May 29, 2008 Posted May 29, 2008 I say stop feeling guilty about it. If you can afford it, it's probably the most honest relationship you'll ever have If I wasn't married I'd probably do the same thing.
Tomcat33 Posted May 29, 2008 Posted May 29, 2008 I say stop feeling guilty about it. If you can afford it, it's probably the most honest relationship you'll ever have If I wasn't married I'd probably do the same thing. yikes! awww c'mon Enema that's unfair you've had the chance to compare don't discourage this guy from making an educated choice he is just starting out his life....that's so sad.
electric_sheep Posted May 29, 2008 Posted May 29, 2008 Hey OP, I'd recommend renting and watching the movie "I Am A Sex Addict". It's one of those rare movies that is quite serious and funny at the same time. Both entertaining and disturbing. Based on a true story, it relates the crazy story of one mans obsession with sex and how it has affected his life. You will probably be able to relate, as he visits prostitutes all the time. The lead actor is played by the real life guy, which is sort of unusual too. He is quite funny and intelligent, but damn near ruins his life (something probably facilitated by his intelligence). I'm not saying your behavior constitutes addiction, but it's something to consider/contemplate.
electric_sheep Posted May 29, 2008 Posted May 29, 2008 ** the girls are very well paid, I will pay between $170-$230 for half an hour, of which the girl keeps 70%. I have no sympathy for them so please spare me your arguments. What's that supposed to mean? I have sympathy and compassion for all of God's creatures, and Hell... I'm a blasted atheist.
jon01 Posted May 29, 2008 Posted May 29, 2008 What's the point of this post? MD Maybe read it over again and you might catch it.
jon01 Posted May 29, 2008 Posted May 29, 2008 The girls are so beautiful some of them have amazing social skills and are very charming. Women are something aren't they? That's because those women are the same as every other woman. There are many educated and beautiful women who work as strippers, escorts, prostitutes, etc. What is the difference between them and the "regular" women? NOTHING. I think every woman is capable to engage in these professions granted the right set of circumstances. It's the oldest trade. Women have been screwing us men over for f* centuries! Think of it that way, and save your money.
Mustang Sally Posted May 29, 2008 Posted May 29, 2008 Here's another way to save your money, MaxManwell. (Interesting name............) Why don't you just give it a wank several times a day? Really. I'm not even being facetious. It'd save you a load (pun intended).... And then you can cut back on your work hours in order to meet a woman with whom you might be able to enter into a VIABLE relationship with (instead of some fantasy relationship of convenience....if you get my drift, "mate"). Good luck with that.
Author MaxManwell Posted May 29, 2008 Author Posted May 29, 2008 Here's another way to save your money, MaxManwell. (Interesting name............) Why don't you just give it a wank several times a day? Really. I'm not even being facetious. It'd save you a load (pun intended).... And then you can cut back on your work hours in order to meet a woman with whom you might be able to enter into a VIABLE relationship with (instead of some fantasy relationship of convenience....if you get my drift, "mate"). Good luck with that. 1. Stop seeing prostitutes 2. .... ? 3. 'Viable' relationship I'd rather do what I did than remain a virgin and therefore let women control my life. I got it up her, and it doesn't matter to me if I had to pay for it or not, sex is still just sex. Maybe, if women are so bloody gracious one of these so called 'viable' women might have let me perform the act. Nah, they don't give a stuff about me or any other bloke in the same position, so why should I care ? What makes them so special that I need to jump through hoops for anyway ?
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