teamzissou00 Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 After developing a crush on a girl in one of my classes during our last semester of school, I had planned on talking to her/asking her out at graduation, which was basically the first and last chance i'd have really, not realizing I wanted to until then. We've never really spoken at length or anything, but she know's who I am, because it was a pretty small class. So anyways, I sent her an e-mail (everyone's school e-mails are listed), just saying who I was, that I realized we never got a chance to talk, but she seemed cool so I wanted to say hi. Nothing clingy or anything, just a simple hello really. She hasn't responded in four or five days, which i've narrowed down to either she just hasn't read it, or didn't realize who I was and/or thought it was spam and deleted it. I don't have any high expectations and I know it's a lame longshot (just something to start a conversation since their is no way to do it in person), but it seems odd not to get any kind of response at all, even if it was just a one-line reply, from which I could take she has no interest in talking further. So anyways my question is, would it be ok to send a follow-up email making it more clear who I am and apologizing for the ambiguity, with a link to my facebook or something incase she thought it was spam or didn't realize who I was, or would that be obsessive? Normally I wouldn't care and just chalk it up to a lack of interest, which is fine. But, I have a huge crush on this girl so I just want to make sure.
tanbark813 Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 I would hold off on the follow-up email if I were you. If she was interested she would have replied.
nymoozle Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 A follow-up email would look really creepy, in my opinion, unless you were extremely vague in your initial email. Can you show us what you wrote?
Author teamzissou00 Posted May 27, 2008 Author Posted May 27, 2008 I basically said I was in her class and realized afterwards we never got a chance to talk, but she seemed cool so I just wanted to say hi, and if she's coming back next year maybe i'll see her around. The ambiguity would be in that maybe she didn't know who I was based only on my first name, which is what I gave. The class was relatively small, but it was just lectures. So its the kind of thing where you see people repeatedly but might not know their names unless you go out of your way to talk to them. Yes that's what I should have done in retrospect, but I didn't realize I wanted to until the very end. I only talked to friends I already knew. She seems really quiet, not that social, and I caught her looking at me on the last day, so I thought maybe she was interested. The second e-mail would be something like "I realized you might not have any clue who was e-mailing you, so here's my facebook".
nymoozle Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 Couldn't she easily browse Facebook to figure out who you are? She could just type in your first name and find the person she recognizes... More importantly, you need to realize that sending that second email definitely comes off as really desperate. I mean, you don't even know this girl. If you're willing to look totally desperate on the very slim chance that this girl will respond to your second email, then okay, as long as you realize that it *does* look desperate and the chances of a response (or at least a non-negative response) are very low. Just my opinion, of course.
Author teamzissou00 Posted May 27, 2008 Author Posted May 27, 2008 Couldn't she easily browse Facebook to figure out who you are? She could just type in your first name and find the person she recognizes... More importantly, you need to realize that sending that second email definitely comes off as really desperate. I mean, you don't even know this girl. If you're willing to look totally desperate on the very slim chance that this girl will respond to your second email, then okay, as long as you realize that it *does* look desperate and the chances of a response (or at least a non-negative response) are very low. Just my opinion, of course. She doesn't have Facebook. That definitely would make things a heck of a lot easier.
Author teamzissou00 Posted May 27, 2008 Author Posted May 27, 2008 Anyone have any thoughts? I don't mind if it might look desperate. I mean if i do nothing i'll never have a chance anyways. I don't want to seem creepy though.
Recommended Posts