Sc430L Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 How long of a window do you get if you break up with someone until they start to loose feelings? I broke up with my gf of 4 years in Oct. 2007. We talked till 2 months ago. All of a sudden she said she dont want to have anything to do with me and hung up the phone. I was in shock. Do I have any chances?
Bobby.Roy Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 My girlfriend of 8 years broke up with me for someone else, on March 2008. I really don't know how long does it take for them to lose feelings. Probably, she already had lost her feelings by the time she left me or something! Aaarrgghhh! Don't even want to talk about it..It still hurts sometimes, real bad..
Author Sc430L Posted May 27, 2008 Author Posted May 27, 2008 Does she still talk to you? How do we get them back?
justaman99 Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 It's different for everyone and every situation. There is a chance she still feels for you and things may come back around. Who knows. Just don't sit around and wait for it.
ButtHead Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 Honestly, I'm trying to get over this myself. The best thing to do is to assume she's never coming back so that you're in a more positive mentality. That way, if she even has any more feelings for you, you're not looking depressed and you have a better chance to get her back. I figure that's MY only chance. That or I ask her to marry me.
ButtHead Posted May 29, 2008 Posted May 29, 2008 Nobody's opposed to the marriage proposal? I'm seriously considering it even though I know I'm still young.
wowIlose Posted May 29, 2008 Posted May 29, 2008 Umm.. no you don't ask her to marry you. Here is how this works folks.. If they push and you try to pull, they will push more and more and more till they don't want anything to do with you.. If they push and you push away harder, meaning NC for several months and working on yourself , proving to them you can live a good life without them then when you reconnect it might all of a sudden respark a small flame... keeping that flame alive and feeding it is another huge obstacle that most people will automatically fail because they'll resort back to unattractive qualities as soon as they feel EX is showing interest.
LL23 Posted June 1, 2008 Posted June 1, 2008 OK...heres what I think in this situation. If she broke up with you then as long as you feel content that she knows how much you love her, then for now let it go. Cut off every possible contact with her and let time pass. If youre still missing her as the next holiday passes or her birthday send her a quick text or email, and say something casual. In my situation...I broke up with my ex in November 07. We talked for a couple months here and there. But we lost conatact and i met someone. After talking to this new guy for only a couple weeks I realized I was still in love with my ex, but he had cut contact from me at this point. Months later I flew down to see him and surprised him @ work. Needless to say he was SHOCKED! You never know the future but it wasnt until he left me alone to my thoughts that I realized how i felt about him. My story had a bad ending though. He was crying cause he was happy to see me , but he fellin love with soemone else...... OH and no dont propose!!!!
Author Sc430L Posted June 2, 2008 Author Posted June 2, 2008 I have had NC with her for 2 months. Today I was online on AIm and she signed on. Shes on right now and we havnt said anything to eachother. She hardly comes on Aim. The only times she used to was to check to see if Im on. Do you guys think I should message her? Or let her message me? I do not want to make her mad because the last thing she said to me 2 months ago was to stop calling her or texting her.
tommiw Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 I have had NC with her for 2 months. Today I was online on AIm and she signed on. Shes on right now and we havnt said anything to eachother. She hardly comes on Aim. The only times she used to was to check to see if Im on. Do you guys think I should message her? Or let her message me? I do not want to make her mad because the last thing she said to me 2 months ago was to stop calling her or texting her. Well don't answer her, because if she really wants to talk to you she'll let you know. You need to stop watching whether she's online or not, It'll make you crazy,trust me. I removed my ex from the contact list, she can message me if she wants (I won't answer unless it's about our relationship), but I don't want to know is she's online.
CaliGuy Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 I have had NC with her for 2 months. Today I was online on AIm and she signed on. Shes on right now and we havnt said anything to eachother. She hardly comes on Aim. The only times she used to was to check to see if Im on. Do you guys think I should message her? Or let her message me? I do not want to make her mad because the last thing she said to me 2 months ago was to stop calling her or texting her. She was pulling away from you long before she broke up. She tried to send you a message "Move on!" You're not accepting the message and that is probably why she got angry and hung up on you. She wants to move on with her life and you're still hanging on. Have some respect for yourself and leave her be. If she wants you, she well knows where to find you.
Sunset_Cowgirl Posted June 2, 2008 Posted June 2, 2008 keeping that flame alive and feeding it is another huge obstacle that most people will automatically fail because they'll resort back to unattractive qualities as soon as they feel EX is showing interest. SO TRUE!! I'm embarrassed to say I myself recently made this mistake. Didn't even realize it at first because I let my emotions cloud my brain. He told me (unprompted) how much he loves me & the kids & how much he misses us, how unhappy he is. He's distant again but not nearly as far as it was when we first broke so I am keeping things light & letting him have his space. At least I can say that I didn't do the HUGE no! no! of asking or hinting about reconciliation! Neither of us brought it up and to have done that so soon IMHO would have severed any chance of it ever happening. We hear it said time and time again, and it's true! Worry about you, work on improving yourself! If you can't make yourself happy then you can't expect anyone else to be able to do it either.
Author Sc430L Posted June 3, 2008 Author Posted June 3, 2008 Thanks for the advice guys. I removed her from my buddylist. I have to move on. If she wants to talk to me she knows where she can find me.
0hpenelope Posted June 3, 2008 Posted June 3, 2008 Thanks for the advice guys. I removed her from my buddylist. I have to move on. If she wants to talk to me she knows where she can find me. Yup. Just let her walk away. She wants you out of her life, so she's going to get exactly what she wants. And if she ever does want you back, nothing will stop her from getting in touch with you. Not your cold shoulder, not your confident "I don't care what you do now. I'm happy, I hope you're in good health, but the brokenhearted person that you left is all but a memory," mindset that you'll develop in time... nope, not all of that will stop her. Take care of yourself. You're feeling down right now, but you know that the only direction to go is up. Life is too short to be anything but joyful. Live well.
Author Sc430L Posted June 4, 2008 Author Posted June 4, 2008 Great advice. Everyday so far has been rough. I think about her everyday and night. Its hard but Im getting through it. I really love this girl. Maybee one day in the future she will contact me. For now Im going to enjoy life and move on.
Author Sc430L Posted June 9, 2009 Author Posted June 9, 2009 Hey guys here is a update.. Well I havnt talked to her since we broke up. Come to find out she has been going out with one of my friends. That was the reason that she just told me stop calling her and talking to her.They tried to keep it a secret for the longest time. When I found out, I sent my friend a message saying Im ok with it and I wish the best for them. He did not respond back. So I do not consider him my friend anymore. The other day she comes on aim using her old screen name. I find it very strange that she used this name because she has a new name that she uses that I dont even know. So then she goes and aims my friend out of the blue. Now my friend tells me everything and my ex knows that. So Im thinking maybee my ex wanted to somehow relay how shes doing to him so that he tells me?? Or maybee shes curious to find out how I am? I dont know .. What do you guys think?
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