VintageGardenia Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 Here's the deal. I have been dating this great guy for about two months now. He's quite a bit older then me, has always been a batchelor, and is very involved with volunteer activities/work (runs his own business). I have heard from mutual friends that he hardly ever dates, and that he has been hurt in the past. We have been seeing each other steadily for about two months now, he has not been seeing any other women beside me and does not say so, but does not like me seeing/talking with other men. He always treats me very well on dates, returns my e-mails and phone calls very quickly, and helps me out when I need help with something. To me, things are going very slow, but as time goes by he gets increasingly more open and more warm with me. He is a guy who is very reserved and gaurded with everyone, but has opened up to me in ways he does not with our mutual friends. He is also very busy with a life style that he had way before he met me, so when he gets busy, I dont take personally, when he is out on a date, he is focused solely on me. I have no doubt that he cares for me, but sometimes its just hard not seeing him as much as I would like to, but I guess then again, its only been two months, and if he hasn't dated a lot it will take him a while for him to transition from non dating to commited relationship. Can anyone offer any suggestions for this situation?
lovestruck818 Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 Here's the deal. I have been dating this great guy for about two months now. He's quite a bit older then me, has always been a batchelor, and is very involved with volunteer activities/work (runs his own business). I have heard from mutual friends that he hardly ever dates, and that he has been hurt in the past. We have been seeing each other steadily for about two months now, he has not been seeing any other women beside me and does not say so, but does not like me seeing/talking with other men. He always treats me very well on dates, returns my e-mails and phone calls very quickly, and helps me out when I need help with something. To me, things are going very slow, but as time goes by he gets increasingly more open and more warm with me. He is a guy who is very reserved and gaurded with everyone, but has opened up to me in ways he does not with our mutual friends. He is also very busy with a life style that he had way before he met me, so when he gets busy, I dont take personally, when he is out on a date, he is focused solely on me. I have no doubt that he cares for me, but sometimes its just hard not seeing him as much as I would like to, but I guess then again, its only been two months, and if he hasn't dated a lot it will take him a while for him to transition from non dating to commited relationship. Can anyone offer any suggestions for this situation? Things moved slow with me and my boyf too. Just wait it out. I just got the L-bomb not too long ago- and we're almost 6 months in. Slow relationships really help feelings develop.
SpikeyChick Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 . Can anyone offer any suggestions for this situation? Reserved men proceed slowly in relationships and with caution. THat is his way. Be patient . Here is a good man who likes to take his time - it this the only problem you have with him ? The rest of him sounds great. PLEASE resist an temptation to create drama to get his attention on YOU. Big mistake that women make. It will backfire .
J2FT1 Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 Reserved men proceed slowly in relationships and with caution. THat is his way. Be patient . Here is a good man who likes to take his time - it this the only problem you have with him ? The rest of him sounds great. PLEASE resist an temptation to create drama to get his attention on YOU. Big mistake that women make. It will backfire . Damn you smart! I really like understanding girls, they get a lot of s**t that guys go through.
Krytie TV Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 My suggestion is to not expect him to be anything in a relationship with you that he was not without you. He isn't going to magically have more time to spend with you. He isn't going to give up any of his commitments. The reason I say this is to make sure you don't expect these things of him and place him in a position where he cannot please you. He is who he is and best to believe he will always be that way.
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