shelly76 Posted June 4, 2008 Posted June 4, 2008 So this weekend is the 1 year anniversary of Mark's death. My H has already given me the heads up that he won't be around to spend time w/our boys this weekend because he needs to be there for 'her.' I forgot to mention that she blames herself for Mark's death because he was on his way to meet her for dinner at a restaurant when he got in the accident. I completely understand that it will be a rough weekend for her. But, I also hope that maybe one or both of them have some kind of epiphany and realize what they're doing is wrong??
jmargel Posted June 4, 2008 Posted June 4, 2008 I guess I can believe it because there was nothing wrong between us. If you truly believe this, then why would you want to be with a man that can just up and leave a great relationship? It's either you are in denial or he has no feelings/empathy towards anyone but himself. He's has taken advantage of a situation and he's just out for himself. The only way he's going to wake up is when he hits rock bottom. When you continue to tolerate his behavior, he will continue to do it. It's time to stand up for yoursefl and your children. He is NOT being a marine he's taking the fundmentals that a marine has and is disrespecting the vows to not only the marines but to you and your vows. Get pissed off already and contact his supervisor. It's time he faces consequences for his actions. Where's Gunny at? I'm sure he would love to comment on this situation.
mopar crazy Posted June 4, 2008 Posted June 4, 2008 So this weekend is the 1 year anniversary of Mark's death. My H has already given me the heads up that he won't be around to spend time w/our boys this weekend because he needs to be there for 'her.' I forgot to mention that she blames herself for Mark's death because he was on his way to meet her for dinner at a restaurant when he got in the accident. I completely understand that it will be a rough weekend for her. But, I also hope that maybe one or both of them have some kind of epiphany and realize what they're doing is wrong?? I am sorry you are going through this. I didn't read your entired thread but has he filed for a D yet and is he still living in the house w/ you and your children? If he still living w/ you kick his ass out, NOW! I am sorry for what you are going through but don't let him get by w/ this. If he wants to see the OW then he can get the hell out and let you start your life over. You don't have to go the route of filing a D yourself at this time but I wouldn't let the cheating jerk stay w/ you. My H also said he wanted a D just out of the blue and I also found out he was having an A. He was going to stay in the house w/ me and our children until I was ready to move back to my hometown. I told him to get his crap and get out until I moved out. I didn't know about the A and I bet if I would have let him stay I would have found out he was screwing around on me w/o all the crap I was dealing w/ trying to find out the truth. You know he is having an A so he needs to get his ass out. If my H said he needed to go be w/ the OW b/c of her BF anniversary of his death he can just stay w/ her. Be strong and give this guy the boot.
Author shelly76 Posted June 4, 2008 Author Posted June 4, 2008 No, he's not staying at our house anymore. He hasn't been living with us since February. He either stays with her or,during the week, he stays down at work. He has filed for divorce (sort of) He's filed, but I haven't been properly served. Maybe I am in denial thinking there was nothing wrong between us?? I know we had grown apart a bit and the relationship had gotten 'stale' but he never brought anything up and I assumed it was part of normal married life after being together 8 yrs . And I truly thought things would get back to normal once the newborn was sleeping thru the night and I was back at work and we were back to our usual routine. I guess I was too busy with a newborn and a 4 yr old to notice that he felt neglected...
mopar crazy Posted June 4, 2008 Posted June 4, 2008 No, he's not staying at our house anymore. He hasn't been living with us since February. He either stays with her or,during the week, he stays down at work. He has filed for divorce (sort of) He's filed, but I haven't been properly served. Maybe I am in denial thinking there was nothing wrong between us?? I know we had grown apart a bit and the relationship had gotten 'stale' but he never brought anything up and I assumed it was part of normal married life after being together 8 yrs . And I truly thought things would get back to normal once the newborn was sleeping thru the night and I was back at work and we were back to our usual routine. I guess I was too busy with a newborn and a 4 yr old to notice that he felt neglected... Sweety, plz try not blame yourself for this. Whether he felt neglected or not he was wrong for what he did. He should have came to you w/ his concerns instead of the OW. My H also said his reasoning for his A was basically the same. He said I didn't pay any attention to him and she did:sick:
NoIDidn't Posted June 6, 2008 Posted June 6, 2008 I truly thought things would get back to normal once the newborn was sleeping thru the night and I was back at work and we were back to our usual routine. I guess I was too busy with a newborn and a 4 yr old to notice that he felt neglected... Don't you dare blame yourself for his infidelity. It sounds like he was carrying on with 'her' while you were pregnant - disgusting. If that is accurate, then you were being neglected far more than he was. If he has any sense of responsibility and conscience, he will regret his actions deeply one day. But whatever you do, don't blame yourself. He made his own decisions, you didn't force him to do anything. I have a newborn now myself, so I know how hard it is taking care of everyone else and trying to return to work - BTDT.
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