pinkduck Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 It's been a week and I still haven't done anything except wallow. I've been so depressed that it depresses me even more. I've gone to work, but other than that I've just been laying in bed..ignoring phone calls, not eating, not moving, no music, no tv..laying there, sleeping, waking, laying, sleeping. It's disgusting but I can't shake it. I have been ignoring him, but it's been easy to do because he was out of town for most of last week. Then the holiday weekend came and I didn't hear from him Friday or Saturday. I assumed he was probably on some nice long weekend trip with his wife..but he ended up calling Sunday, and today. I want to end things. I mean, in my mind it's over, but I haven't informed him yet. It's like there's so much I want to say to him but I know I can't say it all and I'm struggling with what's best to say. There was just so much he lied about. He always spoke as if he looked down on so many people who had extramarital affairs! WTF He wanted my family and friends to like him. He was always so concerned with that....WHY? Why did he have to invade my life? They did like him. Everyone loved him. Everyone loved when I brought him around. Everyone told me he was so perfect for me, and you couldn't find a more perfect match of personalities. Now I have to explain to everyone that I was stupid and had no clue this man has a beautiful, successful wife and I'm just this clueless young whore he's been screwing with.
Miss Stress Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 Nonsense!!! Of course you are WORTHY of a relationship!!!!!!!! I keep telling myself that I am not my finances. You need to do the same. You are NOT other people's actions. Their actions are their own and have NOThing to do with you!!!! That is a common mistake we often make. We take the things that happen around us and make them our own as if that is who we are. That is NOT who you are. You are NOT stupid for trusting someone either. You were human for trusting someone and wanting to love someone. Draw a line down the middle of a page and write the distinction b/t the two of you and your actions. You need to see it in writing. You are NOT the things that happen to you. You are still the wonderful person you were b/f you met this guy. You are in pain, but that is an emotion. None of these emotions or this crappy stuff is YOU. It is the stuff around you. I am so sorry. But pls be glad you didn't move in w/him and have his baby. You still have your whole life ahead of you to find someone who deserves your love.
torranceshipman Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 wtf, he pulled that number on yourfamily and friends too? That guy is too messed up for words...don't even try to understand a mind like that-just get away from him! I'd tell your family and friends straight away too...you have nothing to be ashamed about and everything to be helped through...they'll be as outraged and shocked as you, as like you say, they all loved him and thought he was great!-they'll be able to see what a messed up piece of work he was for doing that to you....unbelievable liar-just unbelievable. Seriously, tell them, you need their support and once its out in the open I reckon you'll feel better, have more people to talk to, etc-their support will really help and it sounds like you are very down and could benefit from that right now.....
frannie Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 Now I have to explain to everyone that I was stupid and had no clue this man has a beautiful, successful wife and I'm just this clueless young whore he's been screwing with. No you don't. You don't have to put it in those terms at all because that wouldn't be true. You have to tell them that the person you were seeing turned out to be a lying piece of scum who misled them too, and while he was at it his poor, unknowing wife at home. Don't feel bad about this, it wasn't YOUR fault. He's to blame. No need to feel stupid at all.
silktricks Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 I was in the same situation about 5-6 yrs ago... I dated this man for about 6 months.. but since I'm very independant, I didn't really gave the 'red flags' much thoughts.. I dumped him that night.. but he called me several times after that.. I thought you never cared if they were married or not.
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