Would this be wrong??

[dmb05]

Hey guys...........my ex dumped me 2 months ago today and I'm pretty much over it now. Anyways, at Christmas this year, we were at her house. Her stepdad's brother's daughter, or stepdaughter was there as well. She didn't know my ex and I were dating, and she was asking my ex's mom all about me saying I was cute, etc.

 

My ex and this girl are not close, and this was the first time they had ever met. I'm wondering if it would be "wrong" for me to go on a date with this girl? I think my ex's stepdad would even help me get hooked up with her. He really liked me and hates what my ex did. Just wondering!!!

[Amy22]

I am not sure it would be wrong but it probably wouldn't be something I would want to get involoved in. It would just seem weird for me to be dating someone in the family. Even if it is her stepdad's daughter. I wouldn't want to see her or her family if things did work out with this girl. That is just what I would do. Only you can decide if this is something you are ok with or not. Like I said I don't think it is wrong. Just not something I would do.

[SeraBella]

It sounds like it's her stepuncle's daughter. So more like a stepcousin rather than a stepsister.

 

I don't know if it's wrong. I don't know if it is something I'd want to get involved in though.

 

I could see if you were out and saw her and started to chat it up and things progressed from that, maybe that would feel more acceptable. But I kind of feel like going through her stepdad to contact this girl feels like it may be more of rubbing it in your exes face. And how often would you potentially still be seeing your ex? Those moments will be uncomfortable, and it may be very upsetting to you.

 

Before going further, if I was in this situation, I would ask myself if this was just a way to get back at my ex...a way that you'd eventually see her with another attractive woman, and you would look "happy" and she could regret what she did, etc. If so, I'd say don't do it. You will regret it later. It will keep the wound open more than you realize.

 

I would also ask myself if this is just a thing of convenience. When we're down and feeling desperate we think of the easiest thing...the one least likely to reject us...the one that will provide the most instant gratifcation. Thinking about dating again and meeting new people and all that crap is heavy on the mind.

 

It's up to you though, and you know the situation and your feelings better than anyone on here does. Only you know if you're really "over" her, and only you know how she would react to this as well.

 

Good luck

[dmb05]

Well IF I even did date her, I WOULDN'T go through my ex's stepdad. I have more respect for her and myself than that. I just said that to mention her stepdad really likes me and wants me to be happy.

 

I wouldn't be seeing my ex often. That was the first time she had ever met her "stepcousin"..........and they are never around each other. I just remembered this girl asking all about me and it was just on my mind today.

[Amy22]

If they dont see each other often that would make it less akward. It sounds like it is something you want to do. If you don't try and see where things go would it be something that you would regret later? If you really want to do it I say go for it.

[Trialbyfire]

If the stepcousin is not a close member of your exes family, it sounds like it's removed enough to not create family awkwardness.

 

Are you interested in the girl purely because of interest or is the a small portion of interest because she's part of your ex-g/fs family, even though it's at a distance?

[dmb05]

I'm interested because of her interest in me. I of course wasn't checking her out back at Christmas, but I remember her being a nice, cool, pretty girl that I wouldn't mind giving a chance. It just so happens she's somewhat part of my ex's family.