Prosecco Posted April 7, 2008 Posted April 7, 2008 I broke NC in a big way with an 8 page letter. Datingmum knows its contents. It was what I needed to say before I could move on to being friends with the ex. I love him dearly, and have to know we're friends before he leaves the country for good. So... the letter hurt him. He finally believed that I love him. It gave him regrets. It made him angry that I hadn't been able to express myself while we were still together... that he hadn't had a chance to understand while we had a chance. It's sad - it might lead to discussing all the things that we should have said while together. But nothing will change the fact he's going to America. Nothing will change the fact we are both who we are, and without mind reading abilities, couldn't have known better. And the timing sucked... I guess... it's sadder for me now. And I was happier bearing the pain alone and not having him hurt, weird as it may seem. As he'd done nothing wrong, he didn't deserve pain for doing the right thing. So - by finally making him see - he's hurting. And I feel terrible for that. Fruitcake? I? Tears on both sides, once again. But - maybe being able to talk means we'll be able to preserve something special, and take something onto friendship. Poor boy. Poor me. Crappy sucky America.
Amy22 Posted April 8, 2008 Posted April 8, 2008 I am sorry. It does sound hard on both of you. You just told him how you felt. If you needed to do that to move on then I wouldn't beat yourself up about it. You did what you had to do. Good Luck Amy
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