minty Posted April 3, 2008 Posted April 3, 2008 I'm very confused. I'm 24 my boyf is 29. He moved from another country to be with me and I know what it is like because I have done that before with my first love. We have a 2.5 year relationship. One minute I am totally happy with him but the next minute I want to be on my own. I think I'm a little scared of having no one but I feel I need to do this to grow as a person. He is a great guy, treats me well but I think he is growing tired of my indeciveness. I'm just bored!!!! I want to have passion and butterflies and fun together! All we ever do together is watch movies or eat out. I like to do things spontaniously and he gets annoyed with this. The smallest things like walking five minutes extra to get a nice piece of cake together! I want romance! We don't often have good sex and it seems like we both get bored. He said he feels like my father - I'm always getting in trouble. I was hanging out with my girl flatmate alot who is an incredibly social person and I could tell he didn't like it - they confronted each other and he basically said he didn't want me getting influenced by her. What do I do? We lived together for six months but I moved back home for a while a few days ago.
Prosecco Posted April 3, 2008 Posted April 3, 2008 I normally view the first 2 years of a relationship as the honeymoon period. It can last longer or less long, personality dependant... but still - that's roughly it. After that - people often get stuck in a rut, and take each other for granted. Relationships - even the best ones - take work. Talk to him. I wouldn't raise the idea of breaking up, yet. I'd talk about how it feels like you're both stuck in a rut, and if you both get bored, you'll end up making each other happy. Ask him to tell you little things that he likes doing that you don't do. Make a list of things you like doing. Arrange some day trips to explore new places. Set one evening a week where you go out and do something - anything - it could be a new hobby, or just going to a different bar each week - so long as it's getting out of the house and doing something new together. Also - set one evening (or more) a week where you do something separate. If he's not willing to do this - then it might be time for a tlak about whether you two are still right for each other. But the boredom / settling into a rut is common - and needn't be a cause for a breakup. Btw - what do you mean by 'getting into trouble'? What kind of trouble? And by 'social' ... what do you mean? What aspect of it doesn't he like?
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