TheRock Posted April 2, 2008 Posted April 2, 2008 My GF is ALWAYS complaining that she is tired and all she wants to ever do is sleep. On a typical Fri. Night if she comes over, she gets there at 8 says she's tired, stays for a little bit like a bump on a log, and is usually home in bed by 10:30. When we go out on a weekend, she always wants to be home by 11ish to go to sleep. If she stays over, there is either no sex or the sex has to be quick so she can go to sleep. Rarely is there sex after 9pm...ESPECIALLY on a work night! This weekend I planned to surprise her and take her to dinner on Sat. at 5:15 and go to a Broadway show from 8-10:45 and hoped to grab a drink w\her in the city before going home and maybe "having some fun." When I told her she said that we prob won't do anything on Fri so she can rest up for Sat. then complained that dinner was too early and in not so many words implied that we'd head home as soon as the show was over so she could be asleep by 11/11:30. Here I am trying to make her night special and all she's thinking of is sleeping!!! I got pissed, cancelled dinner and said fine we're just going to the show and then straight home! I told her the whole surprise- the restaurant, name of the show and that I wanted to take her to a nice lounge for drinks in the city after. She was upset that I told her and ruined her surprise. She asked why I was mad and I told her because nothing is ever good for her, that everything is too early or too late, it's raining, snowing, etc... Personally, I've never known anyone who slept or complained sooo much. She's not lying either. I've seen her at home and her parents say it all the time, and her friends make fun of her for it. Today she's been apologetic. I think she's learning her lesson. Should I make the dinner arrangements again since it is her birthday & will i look like a wuss by "giving in"? Or, stick to my guns and look like a Jerk?
carhill Posted April 2, 2008 Posted April 2, 2008 Not your problem, but she should have a full medical workup. I don't doubt her assertions. Thyroid issues can cause such things, as can any number of chemical imbalances. If she has sinus issues, she could have sleep apnea and not be getting sufficient sleep at night. bla, bla Tons of perfectly fixable reasons. Or, she could just be a control freak. What you do depends on where you see this going. How long have you been together? How well do you know her parents? Could you talk to them privately? My take is that I would hate to walk away from someone with whom I was otherwise compatible and did love simply because of a fixable issue (if it is). How do things look from where you sit?
Gunsmith Posted April 2, 2008 Posted April 2, 2008 Sounds like plain old depression to me. The thyroid shouldn't be dismissed though, as Carhill says.
Author TheRock Posted April 2, 2008 Author Posted April 2, 2008 We've been together for almost 2 years and are compatible in every other way. I believe she is severely depressed and have talked w\her about seeing a Psychologist. She's promised to go several times and I recently told her if she doesn't go soon, we might be through. I do love her and know she loves me. One day recently she even said that we are perfect together and are a great match. I don't like doing this to her, esp on her b-day celebration, but I've reached my breaking point, since this seems to be happening EVERY time we get together lately!!
carhill Posted April 2, 2008 Posted April 2, 2008 OK, you're invested and this is a woman you see yourself with in the future. How old are you (you mentioned her parents like you all are young)? I have some experience with mental illness and mood disorder and I know a lot of people don't like talking about it. Sounds like your GF is one of them. How about you make an appointment for the two of you to go in for some couple's counseling. Tell her you're having difficulties dealing with her emotional and sleep state and need help and want her there with you to explain. If she runs away from this, you likely can't help her. No one can force her. Also, when was her last physical? Personally, I'd eliminate functional physical causes first, as those are easily quantified and qualified. A good medical doctor can also assess her obvious mental and emotional state. Oh, lastly, does she have any odd (to you) dietary preferences or prohibitions? We are what we eat
DanielMadr Posted April 2, 2008 Posted April 2, 2008 Have you asked her what troubles her beautiful mind? Make her crack, she will spill the beans eventually. Medical check up is also a plus.
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