NuTuDating Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 There's more then a few. By far. Not that are available. And certainly not in this area.
dreamergrl Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Dur that's the point some people are celebritites which means most people are the same, i.e., like the same people. Otherwise everyone would be equally popular. Why do girls keep arguing they're not the same? All you have to do is go out with a guy and rock his world and then you've proven you're not like "all' the other girls he's complaining about . Sorry! I misread that! We argue we aren't the same when we get told we are all the same. I'm not going to go rock someone's world just to prove that I'm not a cheater, users, or liar. I can say one thing for sure - only one person that has crossed paths with me in my life ever had this issue - and it was something who kept making the same mistakes and thought the whole world owed him something. Now I'm NOT saying that's the case here - but I see a lot of similarities. I've never dealt with a guy so hell bent on claiming women are this and that. My thought is this simple - I don't generalize. I don't treat people bad because of bad experiences. I don't come down on people because of bad experiences. One person doesn't not represent my view of everyone. People are different - that's all there is too it.
NuTuDating Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Sorry! I misread that! We argue we aren't the same when we get told we are all the same. I'm not going to go rock someone's world just to prove that I'm not a cheater, users, or liar. I can say one thing for sure - only one person that has crossed paths with me in my life ever had this issue - and it was something who kept making the same mistakes and thought the whole world owed him something. Now I'm NOT saying that's the case here - but I see a lot of similarities. I've never dealt with a guy so hell bent on claiming women are this and that. My thought is this simple - I don't generalize. I don't treat people bad because of bad experiences. I don't come down on people because of bad experiences. One person doesn't not represent my view of everyone. People are different - that's all there is too it. Likewise, I've never seen someone so hellbent on somehow making the man be at fault without knowing all the facts and circumstances. See ya.
dreamergrl Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Likewise, I've never seen someone so hellbent on somehow making the man be at fault without knowing all the facts and circumstances. See ya. Interesting... I haven't been talking about men in general. I've been talking about those who have been generalizing women as a whole. And when one makes posts and comments as such - yes it's their actions - so when someone has an action that causes an issue - they should take blame.
TheFonz Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 My thought is this simple - I don't generalize. I don't treat people bad because of bad experiences. I don't come down on people because of bad experiences. One person doesn't not represent my view of everyone. People are different - that's all there is too it. OK but that's just idle words. Even if I believe they're true, it doesn't do me or any other guy any good besides whoever you're dating. So if you're not showing me you're different than it's just words. Besides, if I haven't met your guy why would I take a thrid parties account of him being a nice guy? Point is anyone can say anything, it's what they're actions are that matter.
dreamergrl Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 OK but that's just idle words. Even if I believe they're true, it doesn't do me or any other guy any good besides whoever you're dating. So if you're not showing me you're different than it's just words. Besides, if I haven't met your guy why would I take a thrid parties account of him being a nice guy? Point is anyone can say anything, it's what they're actions are that matter. Deciding to throw up a thread about how one gender is (insert negative comment) is an action though. It's also about choices. Choosing to respond (to answers you don't like just because it's not what you are looking for) with negativity towards others. Which also leads to an action. You may not know me, but you can base your opinion off of what is seen here. I don't go around and say nasty things about men, nor do I come down on them for not giving me an answer I wanted. I don't take my hostility out on anyone here from past experiences. I represent myself to how I am in life.
Rooster_DAR Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 I think a lot of what the poster is stating is that women generally can be very confusing. I read a book recently that also seems to backup this claim, it's by DK books and is called "K-I-S-S" guide to sex. I believe it's the same publisher as Kama Sutra. Many psychologists today seem to elude to this as well. I don't think anyone can disagree that men have lot's of problems trying to read what women want and are thinking, guys are much more black and white. This quote for example: "Nowadays, men are expected to be sensitive, confident, gentle, bold, capable, sexy, fun, and serious by turns - an impossible blend of Brad Pitt and Woody Allen." While I do think there are some men out there that can fulfill this pseudo requirement, I also believe most men cannot, and they should not be expected to by any so-called good women. It's no wonder so many men are struggling in relationships with women, their demands are on the same caliber as terrorist on PCP. So when many men don't meet these demands, it's off to the races. Why is it that men are expected to be something they are not? Why can't women just learn to appreciate a man for being a man and get over it? I agree with many of the ladies here as well, there are good women out there (I"m not sure where?), so some of the statements are invalid IMO. I think it's easy to generalize when there are so many women out there that are either screwing over men, or stripping their identity away to the point they forget exactly what a man is. Women, understand that men are in a position in modern civilization that demands the impossible, and if that trend continues so will thread like this. Cheers!
dreamergrl Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 ? I agree with many of the ladies here as well, there are good women out there (I"m not sure where?), so some of the statements are invalid IMO. I think it's easy to generalize when there are so many women out there that are either screwing over men, or stripping their identity away to the point they forget exactly what a man is. Women, understand that men are in a position in modern civilization that demands the impossible, and if that trend continues so will thread like this. Cheers! It can be just as easy to generalize men though. Just in a different definition. Maybe men don't want all the different things women are looking for - but there are male patterns that could generalize men into all one area. Some of us just choose not to do that.
underpants Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 AAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh, Enough, People are people. The best way to figure one out is to observe and communicate with them on an individual basis. Hugs and kisses, Unders
BareGoddess Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Women, understand that men are in a position in modern civilization that demands the impossible, and if that trend continues so will thread like this. The good men I know, including my H, (and I'm not saying you're not good and well-adjusted) don't let "modern civilization" define them. They define themselves. Find a together woman who accepts you for you. Don't try to make yourself over into something that you're not. Women DO respect, for the most part, a man who is secure in himself, even if he's not perfect. No one person can be ALL things to another. If I want gossipy type banter, (as an example) I don't look to talk to my H. He's not interested in that. No one should have to bend themselves into a pretzel for another.
Chanke4252 Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 I'm not a fan of overgeneralizations regardless of who they are directed at, but I feel like this generalization is one that is pretty easy to make. The bottom line is that people do not understand relationships or themselves, which leads them to give dumb advice and have dumb ideas about relationships and dating. Women who give advice like "just be nice and sensitive" are probably not saying that because they are lying, but because they just don't realize and sometimes don't want to admit that those qualities are not what get their juices flowing. A lot of women are socialized to be that way though, it's like learned ignorance. I've gotten a lot of good advice from women, and there are a lot of women out there who will give it to you straight, you just have to learn to sift through the bull. Another part of the problem is that people are made to feel ashamed of certain wants and desires, women specifically. In my experience, when a woman-friend (who you are not involved with) is comfortable enough to openly talk to you in detail about sex (the gritty details), she's probably a good person to go to for straightforward advice or opinion. Guys are taught to be idiots in other ways and a lot of men will give horrible advice based on very skewed perceptions of reality that are the result of messed up socializing factors. I'd love to have a similar thread about men. As long as people recognize that it is not necessarily a gender thing, but rather a socialization thing then I don't have a problem with it.
Rooster_DAR Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 It can be just as easy to generalize men though. Just in a different definition. Maybe men don't want all the different things women are looking for - but there are male patterns that could generalize men into all one area. Some of us just choose not to do that. I don't disagree here at all!
Rooster_DAR Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 The good men I know, including my H, (and I'm not saying you're not good and well-adjusted) don't let "modern civilization" define them. They define themselves. Find a together woman who accepts you for you. Don't try to make yourself over into something that you're not. Women DO respect, for the most part, a man who is secure in himself, even if he's not perfect. No one person can be ALL things to another. If I want gossipy type banter, (as an example) I don't look to talk to my H. He's not interested in that. No one should have to bend themselves into a pretzel for another. Good point!
TheFonz Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 No one should have to bend themselves into a pretzel for another. I want a girl to bend herself into a pretzel. Why won't more women do this ? I think what the OP and others are getting at is just being yourself isn't good enough for most women. So if they don't do all sorts of things they'd rather not being doing, they get nothing from women.
D-Jam Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Can someone give me cliff notes on this topic so I don't have to go through all those pages? If guys are worried about what women say VS what they do, then always trust YOUR INSTINCTS. Yes women will say many things, as many men will also...but both sides are notorious for not following what they say. In the end, the person you have to trust the most is you. You also have to have that fine line set when the double-talk becomes BS and you just need then to launch the person and look for better.
Rex Man Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Dude, stop complaining. 98% of women can't tell you what they want so it's your job to go out there and find out. Part of being a man.
PinkKittyKat Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Dude, stop complaining. 98% of women can't tell you what they want so it's your job to go out there and find out. Part of being a man. That is the manliest reply I have ever seen in these topics!!!! Go Rex Man!!!
Rooster_DAR Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Dude, stop complaining. 98% of women can't tell you what they want so it's your job to go out there and find out. Part of being a man. LOL...Kinda true.
dreamergrl Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Obviously in relationships minor adjustments are made - but over all I want a guy to be himself. Yeah there's a lot of things that would build up my pretend perfect man - but that's just it, he's pretend. I don't expect the world and heaven too. There are things that are a must (honesty, faithfulness, and what not) and with a few additions that really win me over (humor, open minded, and such) - for me certain traits make up for the ones that aren't there. To be honest, I think I have a better idea of what I DON'T want instead of exactly I do want.
TheFonz Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Obviously in relationships minor adjustments are made - but over all I want a guy to be himself. Yeah there's a lot of things that would build up my pretend perfect man - but that's just it, he's pretend. I don't expect the world and heaven too. There are things that are a must (honesty, faithfulness, and what not) and with a few additions that really win me over (humor, open minded, and such) - for me certain traits make up for the ones that aren't there. To be honest, I think I have a better idea of what I DON'T want instead of exactly I do want. You just want a good looking guy, so shut up. J/k
dreamergrl Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 You just want a good looking guy, so shut up. J/k Yeah darn it - where's Brad Pitt :D Crap... Angelina is still in the picture
BareGoddess Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 I want a girl to bend herself into a pretzel. Why won't more women do this ? I think what the OP and others are getting at is just being yourself isn't good enough for most women. So if they don't do all sorts of things they'd rather not being doing, they get nothing from women. Ok, the pretzel thing was funny! I'll give you that. But screw the rest. It's not true. Sure it's true for some women but then that means you're with the wrong ones. Stay true to yourself and find one who accepts you how you are. Improve what you think needs improving and that's that. NO ONE should change who they are for another.
BareGoddess Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 That is the manliest reply I have ever seen in these topics!!!! Go Rex Man!!! It's "manly" to say that most women don't know what they want? Okie, dokie.
PinkKittyKat Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 It's "manly" to say that most women don't know what they want? Okie, dokie. I took that to mean as most people don't know what they want, and to suck it up and stop whining. LOL In regards to ONLY women being addressed I roll my eyes with you as well. May I?
BareGoddess Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 I took that to mean as most people don't know what they want, and to suck it up and stop whining. LOL In regards to ONLY women being addressed I roll my eyes with you as well. May I? Sure, let's roll our eyes together...ready, set GO:rolleyes: He's deluded. It's like I've been saying. Talk to men. They all want the "nice" girl. Yeah, right. BULLSHYT. They want a little bit of a BYTCH who stands up to their nonsense. If you don't they crap all over you and they have no respect for you. Yes, many are like that. Not the good ones but many ARE like that. So Rex go back and preach to the choir. No one in their logical and right mind is going to buy into that crap.
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