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Posted

My ex who i had been with for around 2.5 years split up with me on valentines day this year, we had been having problems as he had moved away from home to university and it was just a complete change for us both, even though it is not that far away and also i will be there this time next year, it should'nt have been too much of a problem.

Before he left i was asking him if things were going to be okay, and he assured me that he was never going to hurt me and that things will be fine, even though i constantly had this feeling that things wouldn't be.

Obviously things wern't and we began to argue all of the time, about stupid things that did'nt even matter, then finally on valentines day things came to a head and he ended it and i was devastated, i knew that things were bad but i always thought we would be able to get through it.

I know i shouldnt have but when we split up i was texting him and ringing him all of the time, just wanting to speak to him and wanting to feel better, my worst fear was that he would sleep with someone else, i asked him if he had been with anyone else and he said he had not, about a month after we split, i found out that he had slept with two people since we had broken up, i know i had no right to be bothered as we were not together, but he lied to me and i just felt he had no regard for me or our relationship.

Again i was devastated and we argued and rowed and he said he needed space but i wasn't giving it him and there would be no chance for us in the future if i didn't give him space, im not the sort of person to be this upset over someone, but with him its different and its making me a person that i'm not and don't like!

It was his birthday on friday and that was the last time i spoke to him, i told him that i was going to give him space in order for him to think about things but im finding it SO SO hard, i know that it is the right thing to do in order for us to have a chance again, but i MISS him so so much and the thought of him being with anyone else makes me want to cry :(

how do i not text/ring him and how do i get the thought of him with someone else out of my head?

 

ANY advice would be VERY welcome and appreciated!

Posted

It does get easier. It's 8 months since mine dumped me, and it still hurts a lot and I still miss him, but I know now that I won't call him. You have to get through the first month, and then you won't want to mess up your good work.

 

I miss mine all the time, but I won't contact him. He knows how I feel and he knows how to find me. If you don't think he knows how you feel, tell him. If you've told him, you don't have to say it again. They know how to find us if they want to talk to us.

 

All I can say is that you're not alone. It hurts a lot. I'm trying to take comfort in the fact that everything passes in time, but this is one of the biggest hurts I've ever been through.

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Posted

I've only had like 2 days of NC and its killing me! i feel so pathetic! i know that you are right though :)

When you say a month that feels so so far away, id love to say that i could do that and i would love to do that so much!

He knows how i feel, so the rest is up to him now really.

i just want to stop hurting.

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