Cov Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 (edited) Since women have not one, but two threads () where they can post their likes and dislikes in men that us men should have the same opportunity to list and explain what attracts us to women and what turns us off women. Likes Feistiness, spontaneity, innovative, caring, generosity, a great smile, soft skin, decisiveness, honesty (straight talking), self respect, a sense of humour, a balance between maturity and immaturity, intelligence, adventurousness, mischievousness and independence. Dislikes Predictability, dependence, lack of self respect, perfectionism, lack of humour, indecisiveness, spitefulness, miserableness, dogmatism, materialism and shallowness. Edited March 31, 2008 by Cov
TheFonz Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 The number one turn off is a girl using sex as a bargain chip. She should use her charm and her other qualities for that.
KidEternity Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 materialism and shallowness Those are what turns me off. Horrible qualities whether you're a woman or man... Also, selfish, spiteful, controlling and arrogant people really turn me off... What turns me on... lets see... intelligence, killer smile, spiritual, generous, honest, sweet, caring and beautiful...
Little Shy Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 I'm afraid if i list the likes and dislikes I have in women i will realize once and for that the girl for me just doesn't exist. And no I don't want her bare foot and pregnant in the kitchen. I think you need to make this list then & don't be afraid. You don't have to air it here. I made a list a few yeas back on my guy likes & dislikes, and I refer back to it periodically if I get into a relationship (or start of one) where I am not sure if I should continue. I don't really remember what the meat of your posts honestly, but maybe you want to put you list here? I don't think the OP's list was unreasonable at all. Unless OP, you live in my city, then it might be quite impossible to get around shallow, materialistic & vain. In fact, I would venture to say that the men here have just learned to adapt to it, Yikes!
Woggle Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 The number one turn off for me is lack of accountability. When women blame their men when they cheat and generally make everything his fault it turns me off tremendously.
PinkKittyKat Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 The number one turn off for me is lack of accountability. When women blame their men when they cheat and generally make everything his fault it turns me off tremendously. I would think the turn off would be when she cheats, and not who she blames.
Woggle Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 I would think the turn off would be when she cheats, and not who she blames. That too but the shifting of blame really annoys me.
NuTuDating Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 I would think the turn off would be when she cheats, and not who she blames. Flirting is enough of a turnoff. In fact, that's a complete deal-killer for me personally.
Portage Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 oh men who watch sports, burb, crack their beer cans over their head, errr, sorry, am i in the wrong thread??
NuTuDating Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 oh men who watch sports, burb, crack their beer cans over their head, errr, sorry, am i in the wrong thread?? Yeah, wrong thread.
xpaperxcutx Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 oh men who watch sports, burb, crack their beer cans over their head, errr, sorry, am i in the wrong thread?? OP, it's admirable that you listed all your likes and dislikes, but realistically not one woman can possess all the traits you want. It'll be another 50 years or so until you can create your own artificial "Galatea"
Saxis Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 The number one turn off is a girl using sex as a bargain chip. She should use her charm and her other qualities for that. Amen. Also accountability and lack of sincerity. I don't like flakes.
Elemental Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 The number one turn off for me is lack of accountability. When women blame their men when they cheat and generally make everything his fault it turns me off tremendously. Why does what someone says after they cheat even relevant? They cheated. End of story. I don't care if they grovel and apologize or if they try to shift blame. Neither stance would impress me. Here's why. Groveling and apologizing after the fact is usually as much of a way to dodge the consequences as shifting blame. In both cases, they want to get away with it. In both cases, they're scum-sucking pigs.
TheFonz Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Why does what someone says after they cheat even relevant? They cheated. End of story. I don't care if they grovel and apologize or if they try to shift blame. Neither stance would impress me. Here's why. Groveling and apologizing after the fact is usually as much of a way to dodge the consequences as shifting blame. In both cases, they want to get away with it. In both cases, they're scum-sucking pigs. I can see you can't appreciate the difference between someone making a mistake and owning up to it and has a conscience and someone who does something and worng and justifies it and feels no remorese to who they might hurt. That's interesting.
Elemental Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 I can see you can't appreciate the difference between someone making a mistake and owning up to it and has a conscience and someone who does something and worng and justifies it and feels no remorese to who they might hurt. That's interesting. Oh, I can see the difference. It's just that groveling and apologizing isn't the difference. I'm not interested in excuses or apologies, especially not for something that serious. If someone broke into your house, beat you and robbed you, and then apologized, what would you do? Let them off the hook? Thought not! Apologies are for accidents, social gaffes, etc. You apologize when you trip over someone's foot in a crowded theater. You can't apologize for cheating.
TheFonz Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Oh, I can see the difference. It's just that groveling and apologizing isn't the difference. I'm not interested in excuses or apologies, especially not for something that serious. If someone broke into your house, beat you and robbed you, and then apologized, what would you do? Let them off the hook? Thought not! Apologies are for accidents, social gaffes, etc. You apologize when you trip over someone's foot in a crowded theater. You can't apologize for cheating. You have an odd way of looking at things. If someone burglarized your home then they denied it and then blamed you for being burglarized because you didn't have an alarm, have enough security features, live in a better neighborhood, etc, to you that's no worse than if they came out and admitted it, took responsibility, apologized, and offered resititution? That's pretty odd.
Elemental Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 You have an odd way of looking at things. If someone burglarized your home then they denied it and then blamed you for being burglarized because you didn't have an alarm, have enough security features, live in a better neighborhood, etc, to you that's no worse than if they came out and admitted it, took responsibility, apologized, and offered resititution? That's pretty odd. An apology after the fact, following a deliberate act that the person actually had to plan before carrying out is nothing more or less than attempting to buy their way out of trouble. It's exactly the same as shifting responsibility. Both actions are an attempt to avoid consequences. If you can't do the time, don't do the crime. Doing the crime and then trying to buy yourself out of it still leaves you a criminal, only now you double the crime to bribery. How difficult is it to not cheat? Jeeze!
badboymike Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Lack of humor, perfectionism, and women who talk too much(control-freaks). Those turn me off Turn ons: good listeners, able to laugh and enjoy my company, good at pointing out where i can improve in things, good at making breakfast
Nuguy12 Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 I would think the turn off would be when she cheats, and not who she blames. Why would a good man even wait around to hear her try to "excuse" herself and shift blame onto him. I would be 100% gone one microsecond after I comfirmed that a woman cheated. NO second chances and no "forgive and forget" nonsense. Cheating is a choice and she just made the wrong choice. There are guys who would stay around to hear her sprout the old standby BS , " You have not been payng me enough attention lately" ..Pathetic. IF a guy listens to that and believes it ,he deserves to be cheated on a second time.
TheFonz Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Why would a good man even wait around to hear her try to "excuse" herself and shift blame onto him. I would be 100% gone one microsecond after I comfirmed that a woman cheated. NO second chances and no "forgive and forget" nonsense. Cheating is a choice and she just made the wrong choice. There are guys who would stay around to hear her sprout the old standby BS , " You have not been payng me enough attention lately" ..Pathetic. IF a guy listens to that and believes it ,he deserves to be cheated on a second time. Right but I think Woggles point was a duplicitous, deceptive, and unremorseful person is worse than the sum of the actions they do.
Woggle Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 I agree that cheating in and of itself is a turnoff but too many women have this mentality that if a woman cheats the man drove her to it and she is treated like a victim. I see it on this board with some women. A woman says she cheated on her husband and the usual suspects heap sympathy on her and treat her as if she is the one that was betrayed. Not all women on here are like that but you tend to see a certain group in all these threads that act like women can do no wrong.
Trialbyfire Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 I agree that cheating in and of itself is a turnoff but too many women have this mentality that if a woman cheats the man drove her to it and she is treated like a victim. I see it on this board with some women. A woman says she cheated on her husband and the usual suspects heap sympathy on her and treat her as if she is the one that was betrayed. Not all women on here are like that but you tend to see a certain group in all these threads that act like women can do no wrong. I truly hope you read my last post to a female cheater. It was of equal porportion of non-sympathetic advice, as I would give a male cheater. Cheaters suck. That is all.
Woggle Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 I truly hope you read my last post to a female cheater. It was of equal porportion of non-sympathetic advice, as I would give a male cheater. Cheaters suck. That is all. You are one of the women I respect for holding both genders equally accountable.
lino Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 traits that attract me to a woman are simply if she is able to treat me & respect me in the same way I do her. I want her to appreciate me & let me know that she does both with actions & words. Of course I'll do the same for her too. I'm not so fussy yet still unable to find one who is like this for any decent period of time. There are some little & not so little things I don't like in a girl but they are things I can possibly overlook if she's fantastic in most other areas. However the following things are absolutely instant deal breakers for me due to past experience. No exceptions! - No drug use whatsoever, not even recreationally & it includes pot. I don't mind if she drinks or smokes socially though. If she has many more guy friends than female ones. There's usually a good reason why such a girl is like that. I truly hope you read my last post to a female cheater. It was of equal porportion of non-sympathetic advice, as I would give a male cheater. Cheaters suck. That is all. I doubt his comment was directed at you. I pretty much always find what you say to be reasonable
DanielMadr Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Why would a good man even wait around to hear her try to "excuse" herself and shift blame onto him. I would be 100% gone one microsecond after I comfirmed that a woman cheated. NO second chances and no "forgive and forget" nonsense. Cheating is a choice and she just made the wrong choice. There are guys who would stay around to hear her sprout the old standby BS , " You have not been payng me enough attention lately" ..Pathetic. IF a guy listens to that and believes it ,he deserves to be cheated on a second time. You are absolutely right. No need for Ego payback. On the other hand every guy who got cheated on should question why? The same goes for girls. But I think they should ask themselves and demand no BS answer instead of asking their "partners" who probably hates them or resent them now.
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