vulcan Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 Ok so I go 6 days NC with the ex she first calls me to ask if she could borrow some stuff for a speech she had to do. I called her back that night we talk all is cool. Next day she calls me and tells me she is sick. She then tells me somewhere in the convosation about a guy shs hung out with and she didn't want to be there blah blah blah. The thing is I also nitoced when ipicked her up a single rose in her vase from someone I suppose and I saw her phone with some text messages from this guy named Ryan someone she works with. the text messages were like Oh I had a nice time last night ect. Well what i don't get is why did she tell me about the other guy and how she didn't want to really hang out with him but not tell me about this Ryan dude?? Anyways back to the 2 days I spent with her. So I pick her up because she was sick. We came back to my place (she lived with me for almost a year) anyways we get back here I put her to bed got her food took care of her completley. While she was here I didn't bring up the relationship or problems ect. We actualy had a very nice time together just hanging out watching movies and eating. There were some things that were said and done that I don't get or how I should take them. She hugged me a few times said she really appreciated me taking such good care of her. She also mentioned she was really deppressed living here and stressed out. She also said at one time that she doesn't know why she was so bitchy to me. She also cuddled up with me (no kissing) but cuddled up with me the entire time she was here. Also, on sat we got to flirting around with each other and one thing lead to the next. We went shopping sat night and had a wonderful time she acted so cool and sweet. So now Sunday morning we get up after staying up late sat night and she has to go home cause she had homework to catch up on. So I drop her off she hugs me and says I really appreciate you taking care of me and you are such a great guy. I replied no problem then she says Im not even joking thank you you are the greatest guy. I say again no problem I get in my truck and tell her take it easy and drive off that was at 3pm today now its 10:30pm and I haven't heard from her at all. So I'am wondering what does this all mean? what could she be thinking? What do I do? NC again? tell her anything what? What I really would like to know is should I contact her again?
Prosecco Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 I'm confused as to why you felt obliged to look after her because she was sick. You aren't her mother, you're her ex-boyfriend. Doesn't she have any friends? And if she got better after 2 days, it was nothing serious. Seriously - don't let her keep you on a leash. And yes - I'd go back to 'no contact' - but give her everything she needs/has at yours so that she has no excuse to call you...
s_n_d Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 Go back to the No contact routine. Believe me, being in your exs life will just make everything complicated and hurt you even more at the moment. Maybe in the future you can be friends but right now it just is not possible. I think you still have feelings for her and that will end up hurting you if she has moved on (and I think she has moved on). Hope I helped in some way. I used to come on here and ask that very same question... Should I contact him or shouldnt I...I would always end up making excuses to contact him. The contact made things worse for me since he has a girlfriend now (since a month or two after we broke up). Its been almost five months since the breakup now. I think of him occassionally but Ive moved on for the most part.I think part of the reason why it took me so long to get over him was because the contact with him set me back A LOT. Stay strong. Itll be okay.
Author vulcan Posted March 31, 2008 Author Posted March 31, 2008 Well Im wondering I was going to write her an e-mail explaiing that I cant be friends right now but Im wondering if I do that will that push her away if she is just confussed? What do I do? I don't want to make her feel like im giving her an ultimatum because she always said she felt like she was pressured So do I tell her what Im feeling or no?
Prosecco Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 Just say - you need space right now, and hope she understands if you don't respond to messages etc. You don't have to say why. If she then messages you, ignore it.
Recommended Posts