jalexy Posted July 14, 2003 Posted July 14, 2003 I am 21 and I am dating a guy who is 26. From the ages of 18-22 he has slept with and cheated on many many many let me stress many women. He even cheated on the only girl he said he thinks he loved. He says to me now that he is a man and does not do that stuff anymore. He does not cheat anymore. My question is, is this possible? In my gut, I think that this guy has a wandering eye, is a sucker for very sexy females and I think its possible that it could happen one day if we dated long. But maybe I am just being ridiculous? Has anyone witnessed a change in someone and they never cheated again? THank you
Pookette Posted July 15, 2003 Posted July 15, 2003 Well, I'll throw you my two cents and you can make of it what you will. I'm 22, married to a 34 year old guy for a little under a year. He cheated on his ex-wife when they were together. When we got together he made it perfectly clear to me that he wasn't going to cheat on me or all that happy crap. He hasn't yet. I know its only been 11 months, but I sincerely think people can change. BUT, if your gut tells you he's not right on, follow your instincts. Whatever you choose, good luck to you!
People Change Posted July 15, 2003 Posted July 15, 2003 I used to be a cheater a long time ago. Actually almost 8 years. I was young and just stupid. I actually married the girl I cheated on. I told her, and we worked through it. It wasn't easy but it worked out and we are married for 3 years now and very happy. We had everything, childhood sweethearts, long distance relationship and me just being an ass. People can change, I did and I will never think of doing it again. I don't really agree with cheating when married although no time is a good time, when you make the bond of marriage you should never break it. The time before marriage is when you should make your mistakes if you make any at all. That's just my 2 cents.
Haoxin Posted July 15, 2003 Posted July 15, 2003 Cheaters do change . But though this one is risky . Its alright to give them a chance . Criminal do change after their life in jail . If you don't give them a chance who will ? Take that as an example . Try accepting him . But if he hurry you to bed give him a slap . Try going on a steady relationship first . Don't go on bed with him so quickly . If you wanna test his love don't let him find out !! . If one really love you and find that you don't trust them .. their feeling would be hurt . So bad . Good Luck to you . Don't go so serious in one love . If hurt when it break
RogueK Posted July 15, 2003 Posted July 15, 2003 Yes i agree. Hold off on the sex. See what his true feelings are or if it seems that is all he's interested in.
jalexy Posted July 22, 2003 Posted July 22, 2003 just found out that he had sex with a friend's wife who was a stripper.... so do you really think someone with that bad of morals in his past can change?what a scumbag=(
Ally Boo Posted July 23, 2003 Posted July 23, 2003 It's just up to you hun. I've had guys tell me they were different...and they weren't, and then I've had guys who said they were different and were. Either way, it's a gamble, but isn't everything in life? You've just got to decide. Sometimes the thought of being hurt or used is scary, but it's something that only YOU can decide.
Stupid Posted July 23, 2003 Posted July 23, 2003 cheaters never change. in thier hearts they are made a certain way maybe its genetic, hahaha..... The only time a cheater stops being a cheater is when they fall in love (and you can tell because a person who is madly in love acts that way, you just have to be able to discern that)... No one is immune from falling madly in love, but most of the time they're just playing you.
AcId Posted July 24, 2003 Posted July 24, 2003 If you have no evidence he's cheating on you now or has done in the past and you believe him, then i what's to worry about? Just because he's cheated in the past doesn't mean he's more likely to in the future. Make it clear that it bothers you and if his reassurances don't comfort you then i would say that's a bad sign; How can there be a future with no trust?
km82794 Posted July 24, 2003 Posted July 24, 2003 Yes, I agree cheaters can change. Sometimes there are reasons they do, for instance maybe they broke someones heart and actually felt truly sorry for it and vowed to never hurt someone in that way again. But what worries me is this.... what a scumbag=( I don't think you will ever trust this guy because of his past. If you don't have trust, you have nothing! I think, maybe you should rethink this guy! Goodluck!
jalexy Posted July 24, 2003 Posted July 24, 2003 yes, i let him go....i am unable to make peace with his past. =( oh well
Sunflower Posted July 24, 2003 Posted July 24, 2003 Sorry to hear that jalexy. But I think people deserve a second chance if they make a mistake once. But JUST ONCE. Happens one more time I am outta there!! But if I hear that a person has cheated quite a bit in the past I'd be a bit wary myself and wouldn't be able to trust him.
jalexy Posted July 25, 2003 Posted July 25, 2003 sunflower, have you not read this whole post? lol hes done more than just cheat in the past....oh well thank you for posting;)
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