Author themessenger Posted March 31, 2008 Author Posted March 31, 2008 Wow cute girl stay away from those guys! You just made me feel like a saint.
Star Gazer Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 Why have a lot of women got a problem with men who take care of their appearance in the way a woman would? I spend 15 minutes straightening my hair and another 15 minutes gelling it and usually half an hour washing it, blow drying it and a few minutes combing it. Are you SERIOUS?!?!?! You spend longer than I do if I'm actually "doing" my hair, and I have long naturally wavy hair down past my bra-strap that I blow dry, straighten, and style!! I guess the rule should be "he cannot take longer to primp than me."
spookie Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 I have a lot of turn-offs. Off the top of my head, things that turned me off about the recent guys I've been on at least one date with: Mr AS: (I could have a field day with this dude) -how he watched excessive amounts of porn and kept it a secret from everyone but me -how scared he was of EVERYTHING -how he was always cracking non-funny jokes and singing jingles -how he wasn't "into" any type of music -how he never exercised or even went outside -how he was allergic to everything -how, the first time we had sex, he said it was "too hard" for him to be on top (too much of an aerobic strain) so could I please top? -how awful he was in bed -how he liked using anal beads and dildos on himself -how, one time after a party, he told me that he wanted to fcvk every girl there Phil the Rapist -how he had unprotected sex with me as I was saying no Various other *******s I've dated -how they'd convince me to sleep with them because "why not?"
dreamergrl Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 -liars, cheaters, users, and abusers -guys that are all talk no action -being overly passive -having no consideration for others -being self centered -the "I can have any girl I want" attitude -guys that put others down to up their view on themselves
Cov Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 Are you SERIOUS?!?!?! You spend longer than I do if I'm actually "doing" my hair, and I have long naturally wavy hair down past my bra-strap that I blow dry, straighten, and style!! I guess the rule should be "he cannot take longer to primp than me." Yes, I am being serious, but I take a lot less time getting changed than most women and men, so I guess I make up for it in the end. My hair is the nicest physical feature of mine, therefore I take pride in my hair.
Elemental Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 My hair is the nicest physical feature of mine, therefore I take pride in my hair. It's one of my nicest features, too, but jeeze! According to the woman who trims mine, one of the reasons it's so nice is because I neglect it so much. Wash, condition, comb out tangles with a pick. On most days, that's it. I don't even wash it daily; sometimes I just condition it. I make my shampoo and conditioner myself, but even that doesn't take more than half an hour and I don't have to do it every day.
Author themessenger Posted March 31, 2008 Author Posted March 31, 2008 So Elemental any thoughts on what turn women off?
Elemental Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 So Elemental any thoughts on what turn women off? I already posted a list of my own, personal turn-offs, and too much time in front of the bathroom mirror is one of them.
Ocean-Blue Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 So Elemental any thoughts on what turn women off? messenger, are you trying to figure out what turns women off in general or what to avoid in the future? Sometimes it comes down to basic chemistry. You either have it or you don't. Get me?
Author themessenger Posted March 31, 2008 Author Posted March 31, 2008 (edited) chemistry comes and goes there are many factors that influence chemistry other then how your skin smells. And the research i've done so far on Major Histocompatibility Complex is a differnt arena then the causes of body odor. Edited March 31, 2008 by themessenger
Ocean-Blue Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 chemistry comes and goes there are many factors that influence chemistry other then how your skin smells. And the research i've done so far on Major Histocompatibility Complex is a differnt arena then the causes of body odor. When I say body chemistry, I am certainly NOT referring to BO.
Cov Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 It's one of my nicest features, too, but jeeze! According to the woman who trims mine, one of the reasons it's so nice is because I neglect it so much. Wash, condition, comb out tangles with a pick. On most days, that's it. I don't even wash it daily; sometimes I just condition it. I make my shampoo and conditioner myself, but even that doesn't take more than half an hour and I don't have to do it every day. That's you though, what works for you works for you and that's wonderful, but what I do works for me and that's wonderful, too. I like preening myself it makes me feel sexy and confident. A nice pair of skinny jeans, and a nice hair styles make me feel better and that's all that matters to me, my opinion counts more than anyone else's.
sally4sara Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 Most of the things on my list are things I wouldn't like out of anyone. Turn offs: 1. passive-aggressiveness. 2. being judgmental (this goes to racism, homophobia, elitism, etc.) 3. The "not my thing" guy who claims distaste for a whole slew of things he knows nothing about and has never tried citing that it is "just not my thing". How would you know if it is or isn't? 4. Guys who use the term "hottie". It comes off really immature. 5. Frat boys. I can always tell even if they are years out of college. 6. Extreme conservatism because it tends to go hand in hand with #2 and #3. 7. materialistic nature 8. Guys who are controlling. 9. Guys who spend money recklessly. 10. A guy who spends a lot of money on me especially when we first go out. It makes me wonder if I'm being bought or if he is doing it to make up for something else he intends to not give me that I will place more importance on like commitment, true intimacy, or respect. 11. A guy who takes himself too seriously. 12. Guys who think women are suppose to be a certain way. 13. Guys who think a woman who really likes sex can't be trusted 14. Guys with no direction or goals 15. Guys who have a goal but do nothing to attain it as though wanting it will cause it to just happen one day. 16. Guys who never read and would come off more intelligent if they did. 17. Arrogance and being condescending. 18. Guys who perpetuate the double standard. 19. Guy who get bunched up over me having guy friends. ESPECIALLY if he has female friends. 20. Guys who lie even if just to avoid potential conflict. 21. Guys who try to show me off to their friends and/or share intimate details about what we do in bed. 22. Guys who get so offended by other drivers on the road that they start speeding and cutting them off repeatedly to teach them a lesson. 23. Guys who actually try to make me jealous or feel insecure on purpose. 24. Guys who are insecure and jealous. Even more so when they exhibit trait #23.
shadowplay Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 (edited) Badmouths people behind their back. (You know he'd do the same about you.) Judgmental, critical, intolerant of things that don't even affect him. Inconsistent. Blows hot and cold. Emotionally unavailable, or lacks depth. Bitter. Passive aggressive. Feigns sensitivity, interest in your personal life to win you over. Basically disingenuous. Pretends to be nice to get in your pants. Self centered. Never asks questions about you or remembers details of your likes/interests. Careless, habitually late, irresponsible, immature. Rarely calls or initiates contact. Forgets important dates (birthdays, holidays, anniversaries). No spontaneous displays of affection. Wimpiness. Lack of integrity. Inability to be assertive. Flakey. Edited March 31, 2008 by shadowplay
shadowplay Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 This is my all time favorite thing to do. For me it's a must in a potential mate. Bad mouthing people is heaps of fun. that's very attractive...
Trialbyfire Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 I hate men who whine and moan about the inequities in life, instead of dusting off their arses and getting on with the business of living and being a decent human being.
HeavenScent Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 I cannot stand men that blame their past for whatever they have become now - bitter men.
shadowplay Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 Instead of posting things I think I don't like, I'll post things I've actually dismissed men for. In no particular order: 5. Pop culture zombie. If he knows anything about Survivor or American Idol, I'm not interested. Double points if he's wearing brand-new, fashionable clothes, has "product" in his hair, or shows any other sign of having spent more time at the mall or in front of the mirror than I did. Hint: that doesn't give him much leeway. Amen. One of my bf's friends DVRs episodes of Laguna Beach and gets more into it than his gf. I don't know how she puts up with him.
O'Malley Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 Guys that refer to themselves as a "nice guys" or a "bad boys". Both are opposite sides of the same flawed coin. The genuinely nice male friends and SO's I've had have never described themselves as such; it's simply how other people view them. Rudeness and condescension to service staff, to subordinates at work, to anyone they consider their intellectual or physical inferior. Those men who make negative blanket statements about women, as if we're the Borg and they must resist the collective unit.
Ebeleptik38 Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 Turn offs: 1. Men who are racist. 2. Men who make fun of people who are victims of circumstance (disabled people, people who are 'ugly' because they are sick, etc.) 3. Men who are materialistic and shallow. 4. Men who are homophobes. 5. Men who are passive aggressive (always late, cheat, etc.) 6. Men who are wishy washy and lead you on. 7. Men who have short tempers and are angry assh*les in private and in public toward others. 8. Men who are physically abusive. 9. Men who are overly jealous and possessive, and clingy. 10. Men who have 'mommy' issues. 11. Men who are feminine (I'll be friends with guys like this, but won't date them), or way too metrosexual. 12. Men who don't read for pleasure. 13. Men who are codependent. 14. Men who are too trendy (ones who look like walking stereotypes). 15. Men who are unimaginative in bed. 16. Men who don't care about their health or hygiene. #12....LMAO....ok?!! We'll darn I was hoping we would be a match made in heaven. I'd drop a girl in a flash if I ever knew I was being judged like that!
PinkKittyKat Posted March 31, 2008 Posted March 31, 2008 Turn Offs (in no particular order) 1. Bigoted (sexist, racist, homophobic) 2. Dislikes animals 3. Is rude to waitresses, waiters, clerks 4. Makes hurtful comments and tries to say "I was just joking!" 5. Smells bad 6. Doesn't take care of his appearance(yes, Cov's daily primping would be fine by me, my current bf takes longer than I do to get ready for work and he looks marvelous) 7. Seems "shifty", evasive about details 8. Will not make eye contact/pay attention/react to me when having a conversation 9. Will not show affection in public, makes me feel he's ashamed of showing people he's attached to me 10. Strangely enough, I am turned off by men who act mushy around kids. I dislike kids, but I'm nice to them. When I say mushy, I mean way overboard. It makes me feel like the guy secretly wants to knock me up. Or leave me for someone who will squirt out some crotchfruit for him... 11. Lazy/unemployed 12. wimpy, will not say anything if people are being rude in movie theatres, malls.. etc. 13. Highly critical of my appearance/job/activities 14. Doesn't read books 15. Doesn't take an interest in my likes and dislikes (I always at least try out things my bf enjoys) 16. Inconsiderate in bed(he doesn't even have to be fantastic, as long as he CARES about my enjoyment too) ~~~~~~~~~~ Some of these things are negotiable, others are NOT. My current bf doesn't like books, and I'd never break up with him for it, but I sometimes think how nice it would be to discuss a book I have just read with him..... And he's very "distracty", he has a hard time focusing on people while conversing with them. It's just how he is with everyone, but it gets frustrating sometimes. I'll be, like, answering a question he's asked me about something and suddenly he's staring at my cat, talking to her, and then getting his computer out of his bag... I have to say, "Um, are you listening?" and he'll look at me like "Um...Yesss..." and attempt to simply repeat what I am saying back to me. I'd also never leave him over it, but DAMN, that is a quality in any person that makes me want to punch them in the face! He does try harder with me than he does with friends/family, so I forgive him.... I think women can deal with one or two turn offs as long as the guy makes an attempt to "deal with them" in a compromise way. This only applies to some... I'd never make him read my books, but if he started being mean to my cat or being racist, it would be dumpsville for him.
monkey5 Posted April 2, 2008 Posted April 2, 2008 turn offs: controlling behavior, being needy/clingy, strong/bad body odor, no sense of humor, treats others poorly/bad people skills, too forward/pushy turn ons: sense of humor, self-respect, self-control, patience, speaks highly/considerate of others, confidence, nice smile (guys don't smile enough), clean, family oriented
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