livetoride1500 Posted March 29, 2008 Posted March 29, 2008 Hi everyone I am a soldier deployed overseas and my marriage is on the brink of destruction. My wife and I can't seem to see eye to eye anymore and being here is all the harder because my hands are tied. Alot of the problem is the way things were before I left. I was a very angry and hateful person. Mainly because of a job I didn't like amongst other things. I'll admit I've done some stupid things like walk around the house in my underwear, look at porn on the internet, and some swearing at the dinner table, alot of which my 14 year old stepdaughter was present to witness. My wife would tell me she didn't appreciate this and it wasn't appropriate, but like an idiot, I would just blow it off. I also had an explosive temper to which my daughter is scared of me now and feels as though she has to tip toe around me. I hate the way I was and if I could take it all back I would. I've been away for 7 months now and it's given me alot of time to think about things. I know this is no excuse and I can clearly see why my wife is pissed. I'm going home on a 10 day leave and what blew my mind was when my wife told me she was going to hand over my youngest daughter to me(she's 3), and just take off. I was shocked she didn't want to see me. She also said that me being deployed is actually kind of nice and she actually dreads me coming home. This is where our conversation went downhill because I wouldn't let this issue go and kept asking about it. I guess my question is this: How do I make amends with my wife? I still love her and I hope she still loves me. I want every moment to count when I go home on leave and not fight. I want to start over so bad, but sometimes I think it's too late. All I want is for us to be happy and grow old together. Also for my kid's sake too. I just hope she has it in her heart to know that I'm sincere about this.......Thanks
LadyInsanity Posted March 29, 2008 Posted March 29, 2008 A sincere letter would be a good start....but as you know, actions speak louder than words, so you'll have to earn back their trust...if they let you. Good luck!
Darth Vader Posted March 29, 2008 Posted March 29, 2008 There may be someone else in the picture, I hate to say it, but, it is a possibility!
Author livetoride1500 Posted March 30, 2008 Author Posted March 30, 2008 Thanks for the replies, I called my wife yesterday via payphone and kind of had a heart to heart with her and told her how I felt. I explained to her that I think she is doing a fantastic job taking care of things while I'm gone and I understand how she feels overwhelmed. She just said that she's frustrated with our little girl and how she is such a handful. She's been working alot of hours just to get a break form her. Alot of the problem is with my stepdaughter too, as my wife told me that she's the one that wants her mom and I to break up and also that she hates me. I'm really going to have to reconcile with her too. I've put her through alot. She's a really good kid, staight A's at school, good morals and well behaved. I was too much of a hard ass and need to lighten up alot and just let her do her own thing. I could tell my wife was crying on the other end. I don't know if she was crying from being confused, guilt or happy. I sure hope there isn't another guy in the picture, I just can't see my wife stooping that low. If anyone has any ideas how I should reconcile with my stepdaughter, let me know. Thanks
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