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How do I stop this?!!


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Posted

Okay so I recently started seeing this girl who I have known for a little bit. We have both had crushes on each other for a while before, and have talked to each other so we weren't starting out from the beginning. The first date went okay. We headed out for dinner and a movie. Dinner was kind of awkward but enjoyable none the less. At the movies at first we kinda just sat and talked, starting battling over the arm rest, and by the time previews ended we were holding each other throughout most of the film. The night ended with a short conversation, and a kiss which just happened naturally, and then turned into a few more.

 

We got together 2 days later, and ended up spending almost 4 hours together just walking around talking, and then sat in m car for about an hour and a half and just talked, filled with many laughs and tons of kissing!

 

I really like this girl a lot, but one thing that bothers me is the day after we go out, i feel sick or off kind of and I can stop thinking about her. I really want that to stop!!! Any advice? I need to be able to function normally when im not with her!! Will this go away with time or is there something I can do? Like I said, its not really a BAD thing, but it is. You know what I mean :-P

 

If this helps, when I talked to her on the phone, online or text I feel a lot better.

Posted

Morgenstern! You're in the honeymoon phase of being in love! You're gaga, smitten, dizzy, obsessed. LOVESICK!

 

No, there's nothing you can do about it. It is VERY distracting, but it will pass with time. Some people feel that it's a bad thing when it fades.

Posted
If this helps, when I talked to her on the phone, online or text I feel a lot better.

 

Actually from my own experience from what you are doing, its alot worse.

 

When you feel overwhelming attraction to someone you got to be carefrul that it won't consume you. Otherwise What you are describing here is similar to drug addict getting addicted to a drug and experiencing withdrawl symptom when the drug is taken away.

 

There are few things you can do.

 

1) Occupy yourself with other activities. Get some hobbies or work out.

 

2) Since you are only in the "dating phase" and not in a committed relationship maybe its best to explore dating other girls as well until you find what you are looking for. This way you don't end up going gaga for a single woman and when you end up choosing the type of women you want to commit to, you won't do so reeking of desperation.

 

Have a good day.

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Posted

Haha I mean I do stuff when im not with her obviously, I dont feel sick per say. so that that I cant function, I just kinda feel a bit off. Maybe I overstated the problem.

Posted

You really like this girl. But a word of advice, like all the previous posters, it's very important not to let your feelings consume you. Feelings die hard but hearts break far too easily.

Posted
I really like this girl a lot, but one thing that bothers me is the day after we go out, i feel sick or off kind of and I can stop thinking about her. I really want that to stop!!! Any advice?

 

Date more women. Seriously.

 

Guys who get this feeling are inexperienced when it comes to dating. After you've dated lots of women, that feeling gets dull and you hardly notice it.

Posted (edited)
Date more women. Seriously.

 

Guys who get this feeling are inexperienced when it comes to dating. After you've dated lots of women, that feeling gets dull and you hardly notice it.

 

Yup. That feeling the OP has, that's his danger sense tingling. Not that the girl is evil or whatever, but that means he's now vulnerable to some really bad decision making.

 

But kudos to you OP for asking how to stop it. I think the only true answer is like what Lovegod said, experience. Date more women, and you'll figure out the best way to proceed while keeping yourself safe. Other than that, you could try hobbies and other things you like to do to distract yourself.

Edited by fishtaco
Didn't answer the OP's question.
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