confuzzled12 Posted March 28, 2008 Posted March 28, 2008 ok so im dating a shy guy...a really shy guy. i think ive come to realize that i will most likely have the make all the first moves (i was the one who told him i liked him first and then he asked me out on a date). were both pretty inexperienced except im more outgoing than he is (im still pretty shy). we had our first official date the other day and it was nice and fun yet he tried absolutely nothing with me. at the movies, i tried and put myself out there and laid my head on his shoulder and he kinda did nothing. i mean, were not uncomfortable when were in each otherse personal space but he doesnt do anything about it. its weird cuz he tells me things like im really smart and that he enjoys spending time with me and he told me he likes me but he makes it hard to believe sometimes! hes so sweet and cute in texting and whatnot but in person its a completely diff story! how do i handle dating a shy guy? im really open and i like to talk about things...should i talk to him about this? about us? about how i can make him more comfortable, or is that something that shudnt be said...because i want to make him more comfortable so that he can make some first moves and not always me! im surprising him with a picnic date in two days at the park. do u think that is a good time to talk? i dont wanna rush and make him uncomfortable but i do just want us to be able to communicate and whatnot.
NuTuDating Posted March 28, 2008 Posted March 28, 2008 Just grab him and kiss him. What guy wouldn't like that?
zicke Posted March 28, 2008 Posted March 28, 2008 If you are ok with the one pursuing, go for it. It's not my thing though. It would drive me batty..however, there are men out there that want women to pursue and initiate. If you are ok with him taking the passive role and you the dominant, it would probably work out well. However, if you are more feminine, which by your posting, I am gathering you do like to be pursued, this may not work out so well. Figure out if you are ok with being the initiator.
Author confuzzled12 Posted March 28, 2008 Author Posted March 28, 2008 i tihnk im just worried cuz everyones been like "actions speak louder than words" and have been telling me that if he really likes me he would be more comfortable and try stuff (small stuff like holding hands and whatnot). im just scared that maybe im being flung around? i dont know what hes thinking about all this. well he told me that before we confessed that he liked each other he was kinda freaked out cuz hes never reciprocated that he liked someone before.
Covonia Posted March 28, 2008 Posted March 28, 2008 You have two options 1) You can talk to him about how you feel and try and gauge the significance of his feelings towards you and then if everything's rose just plant a kiss on his smacker. 2) Just go on this picnic and make action's speak louder than words and plant a kiss on his smacker out of nowhere, if he likes you, he'll participate in the kiss and that will be a great indication as to where you're both heading.
KidEternity Posted March 28, 2008 Posted March 28, 2008 (edited) ok so im dating a shy guy...a really shy guy. i think ive come to realize that i will most likely have the make all the first moves (i was the one who told him i liked him first and then he asked me out on a date). were both pretty inexperienced except im more outgoing than he is (im still pretty shy). we had our first official date the other day and it was nice and fun yet he tried absolutely nothing with me. at the movies, i tried and put myself out there and laid my head on his shoulder and he kinda did nothing. i mean, were not uncomfortable when were in each otherse personal space but he doesnt do anything about it. its weird cuz he tells me things like im really smart and that he enjoys spending time with me and he told me he likes me but he makes it hard to believe sometimes! hes so sweet and cute in texting and whatnot but in person its a completely diff story! how do i handle dating a shy guy? im really open and i like to talk about things...should i talk to him about this? about us? about how i can make him more comfortable, or is that something that shudnt be said...because i want to make him more comfortable so that he can make some first moves and not always me! im surprising him with a picnic date in two days at the park. do u think that is a good time to talk? i dont wanna rush and make him uncomfortable but i do just want us to be able to communicate and whatnot. Argh! I had the same trouble with my ex-girlfriend! I think it was maybe because I was her first boyfriend and she didn't really know what to do, but I was initiating everything, and it eventually became kinda frustrating because you didn't know where you stood with her. It was like "I don't know if you like me, you keep telling me, but never show me!". If it is only your second date I'd kinda just see how that goes and if he doesn't do anything then you might have to talk about it (not a bad talk obviously, maybe just a passing mention that'll make him think about intiating more) I think for a good relationship both people to be equal on that kinda thing. At least he asked you out though so there is a good sign, maybe he just needs to get a bit more comfortable before he tries anything. Also as a former/still kinda shy guy I guarantee you that in his head he is thinking of doing something, but maybe he just can't for whatever reason... Edited March 28, 2008 by KidEternity
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