The Studmuffin Posted March 26, 2008 Posted March 26, 2008 what are breaks? what's the difference between breaking up and taking a break? does anybody have actual examples of breaks working... that is maybe providing space and time to think and time away (which i imagine must be the points of the break), and then allowing people to get back together? do you first decide to go on a break, or do you break up for real and then get back together and call it a break afterwards? i'd love to hear from somebody who has a story of a break working or not working...
LoveLace Posted March 26, 2008 Posted March 26, 2008 Remember their ongoing love thing on that show? Well at one point they decided to go on a "break". I'm not sure if they defined what this really meant though, as far as seeing other people. Anyway, Ross then had a one-night stand. Rachel held this against him for a long time...and he continued to use the excuse they were "on a break". But in Rachel's eyes, he did something that clearly hurt her and she took it personally..eventually they did get back together...but it is a TV show I'm talking about here... In my experience, "breaks" have always ended up meaning "break-up". But it's not the case for everyone. People break-up and make-up all the time. If someone suggests taking a "break" but insists they don't want to "break-up", then specifics need to be discussed...1) How long are we going to give each other time and space? 2) Are we allowed to date other people during this time? If both parties really want it to be just a "break", then say ok, we will come together on this day at this time, and discuss what conclusions the break has brought us to. If someone says "let's take a break" but is too general about what they want that to mean exactly, chances are they'd really rather just "break-up", but they don't have the balls to say so. This is also from personal experience. I think that most true "breaks" are intended to somehow help the relationship instead of hurting it.
Chanke4252 Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 In my experience breaks are usually just someone who wants to break up and wants to test the waters of the breakup scenario. This usually just leads to a breakup either because of the subsequent decision or because of the needless strain it puts on things. Very rarely do people actually initiate breaks for non-selfish reasons, though I could see it happening on very RARE occasion.
Rooster_DAR Posted April 1, 2008 Posted April 1, 2008 Breaks are the the cushion that pads an inevitable breakup.
Author The Studmuffin Posted April 2, 2008 Author Posted April 2, 2008 ok... this was pretty much my view as well. so does absolutely nobody have a successful story about a break??? i'm also wondering if there is such a thing as emotional fatigue... and people are just tired after a difficult period in the relationship (like not much time to meet, misunderstandings and fights, etc.) but there are still feelings for each other... and a break is somewhat a time to rest and recover and take time to listen to your feelings, sort out what's important to you. what do you think ?
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