Lucky555 Posted March 25, 2008 Posted March 25, 2008 All my friends say you should have a talk about what you want in this on/off relationship. I just want to run away to avoid the confrontation. I "presume he would say" you are still in college and i am not. Your not on your own paying bills. Neither of us live in our own space. Yes i agree that we are in two different places in life but if we are going to continue hanging out then (i have no idea what to say because i like him but agree at the same time.) (i want to see what he thinks before i make a call of saying lets just be friends.) He will say, well i want to see where things go and i enjoy hanging out with you. (its over a year now. in the beginning it was fun just being carefree but now i need more) I would say, this is very inconstant and i need consistency. So what do you all call this. I think my feelings for him are getting in the way of what i should be doing. There are no guarantees in life and maybe i should just go for the talk but my instincts tell me this is what he will say. so does this mean that he is basically using me? and should i have the talk but wait for him to start a conversation?
IrishCarBomb Posted March 25, 2008 Posted March 25, 2008 Just end this train-wreck. It'll suck at first, but soon you'll be much better off. And he's not using you... I hate when women say that. You need to be accountable for your own actions. You can say no to him, and if you aren't getting what you want out of the relationship, you have to be an adult and either demand more from him, or move on to a new relationship.
Author Lucky555 Posted March 25, 2008 Author Posted March 25, 2008 I totally agree, its a wreck for sure. If he was interested he would pursue me more. So its over over over. Right its a mutual thing that we had and it can end very easily. I need someone to knock some sense into my head about this. Even my own friends say its awful whats happening. I just don't like confrontation, my last boyfriend it took me a month to end it. I just don't like breaking the news to them. This man knows what a relationship takes and hes not doing it as they say "why buy the cow when you can get it for free" thanks!
Covonia Posted March 25, 2008 Posted March 25, 2008 I just don't like confrontation, my last boyfriend it took me a month to end it. I just don't like breaking the news to them. This man knows what a relationship takes and hes not doing it as they say "why buy the cow when you can get it for free" thanks! Who does? You need fess up and move on, don't be concerned for his feelings, he's hardly going to die is he? Just move on to something else, that makes you happy and feel (dare I say it?) Cherished.
Author Lucky555 Posted March 25, 2008 Author Posted March 25, 2008 Everyone is right around me. My friends and people hear. I am deciding not to break the news to him but he will figure it out on his own. Yeah, it does suck but at some point it will get better. Yeah, i know i deserve to be cherished which is not what i am getting at all.
mortensorchid Posted March 25, 2008 Posted March 25, 2008 I don't understand why it is that so many guys these days want to have "the talk" with women. At least in my experience. I had someone write a list of my bad points, not once but twice. The first one said that he was very uneasy about the fact that I see a shrink, because he didn't want to get involved with someone who is mentally ill. The second one told me that I failed in my karate training because I did not go and confront the unwelcomed visitor at my house several weeks back because I didn't confront him, instead I ran to a neighbor's house for shelter. Neither of those two, coincidentally, had any friends or a social life. Instead they just sat around watching Oprah and all those hilarious talk shows and applied every flaw to me. Because they have nothing better to do with their time, have no other interests or friends to distract them, and have nothing to loose by taking stabs at me. Or, in your case, you. Move on. None of us are perfect, we're all just as annoying as the next guy, and you have to accept people for who they are and what they are all about. Unhitch yourself from this evil person who has nothing to do but tear you down. There will be someone else.
Author Lucky555 Posted March 26, 2008 Author Posted March 26, 2008 mortensorchid Thanks...your description of guys that "picked at you" is like this guy. He really has no social life. He sits around watching tv. He actually has said that the only thing i need to learn is from tv! Ridiculous. I am blinded by my emotions and i have to get over it. This was a second time around with him. I gave him a solid week to talk to me and he has not after hanging out with eachother. He will be back. I wont be there waiting.
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