Always_Sawee Posted March 25, 2008 Posted March 25, 2008 hello guys. . i really need some insight here . . my ex broke up with 3 months ago . . but it seems that i cant move on . . i always think of her . . is this normal ? how can i move on? thank u guys.
0hpenelope Posted March 25, 2008 Posted March 25, 2008 You'll dislike hearing this over and over again in different ways, but it's really about time and keeping yourself occupied. And... distance yourself from anything that brings up that yearning, "I miss her so much" feeling for some time. L and I haven't been together for almost 2 years and I still always think of him. There are still tough days, like this morning. For some reason, I just missed him a lot. I chose to have no contact with him, so sometimes wondering about what he's doing (and "who he's doing") gets a little overwhelming. That used to happen more frequently; now, not as much. Just my 2 cents. Good luck.
Chinook Posted March 25, 2008 Posted March 25, 2008 (edited) In the grand scheme of things, when you've fallen for someone, three months isn't a whole lot of time to give yourself to get over someone. My advice for what it is worth (and as the previous poster said, you may get sick of hearing it) is the following... 1. No contact at all. No phonecalls, no emails, no surfing their facebook/myspace/whatever, no walking past their house/store/friends, no discussing with mutual friends what they're doing, no smoke signals, no telepathic wishing for things to be different etc etc. No contact, at all, nada, zip, zero, nothing. 2. Exercise. Run, bike, swim does it for me. Engage in some form of physical exercise where you're focusing on you, where you're having 'you' time, where you're giving yourself space. 3. Put away any photos, letters, mementoes etc. Put everything away in a box and shove it in the loft. If they still have belongings at your place, either get rid of them or get a friend to pick them up. Other than that, make sure your daily living and working space doesn't contain any mementoes or reminders of the other person. No mooning over things. Put it out of reach. If you have the courage actually throw it away. I did and occasionally when I felt the urge to look at a photo or memento, I was glad I did. 4. If you're of the age that you're allowed to drink alcohol... avoid it. Alcohol doesn't help or make you feel better. Alcohol is a depressant and can in fact, make you feel worse. I've found myself after having a glass of wine feeling sad when I wasn't sad before. 5. Focus on your social life. Start doing things you couldn't do with the other person around. Invest time in activities and families and friends. Go out more, turn the computer off and just go out, go sit in a coffee shop, walk around the park... say 'hi' to that cutie walking by. 6. Smile. Today is a whole 24 hours you can choose how to use it. Seriously, just try smiling for no reason... you'll surprise yourself, even if you don't much feel like it. 7. Remind yourself, you're apart from the other person for a reason. If you were meant to be together you would be. Things are the way they are for a reason. You have your issues, they have theirs. You can only take responsibility for your 50% of the relationship... the rest of it is theirs. Only take responsibility for the issues you have responsibility for... none of the 'if only I was better' or 'if only I did this'. It's over. It's over for a reason. The way forward is to deal with that. Edited March 25, 2008 by Chinook
Ofleg7 Posted March 25, 2008 Posted March 25, 2008 I especially agree with number 6 above. My girl and I broke up 3 and a bit months ago, and I'm having trouble moving on too, so you're not alone. The majority of people on this board (or this section of it anyway) can relate to what you're going through. I really have tried but I'm still always thinking about her, especially when I have spare time. I just keep feeling that I'll be able to make her change her mind, but I never do and it's only damaging. So what I'm doing is getting with a girl who I know is into me.. even though I'm not into her very much at all. It may sound cruel but I will let her know from the beginning that I'm not looking for anything serious, not yet anyway. Good luck for the future. You will be happy again sometime
Author Always_Sawee Posted March 26, 2008 Author Posted March 26, 2008 thank u for the reply guys . .i really appreciate it . . !
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