Foreverfrustrated Posted March 23, 2008 Posted March 23, 2008 Hey everyone, any advice on the fact that i had a serious relationship it was for over 2 years. We spent alot of time together, and she was my best friend, well as you guessed we broke up and are no longer friends, she's getting married in acouple weeks, i don't miss the relationship or her in the sense of being my girlfriend, i just really miss my friend, i don't think i've ever let anyone that close, and at time i just almost break down. Any help?
kymberann Posted March 23, 2008 Posted March 23, 2008 I say break down. You have to give yourself the time to grieve. It is a loss and you have to go through what you need to to recover.
Author Foreverfrustrated Posted March 23, 2008 Author Posted March 23, 2008 I say break down. You have to give yourself the time to grieve. It is a loss and you have to go through what you need to to recover. Even though it's been alittle over a year now... should i still be having these feelings? I mean, i thought i was better than this, i even think it might be keeping from my current girlfriend who is 10x the woman, she (Ex) ever was. I guess i'm just having a downer day Thanks for the suggestion though, i'll maybe let that out tomorrow.
0hpenelope Posted March 23, 2008 Posted March 23, 2008 Brother, you have to grieve. I heard this crappy advice that one should not grieve longer than how long the relationship lasted, but that's totally not true. Grieving time varies from one person to another. My ex and I have not been together for a year and a half now and it still hurts. It hurts less now because I slowly getting numb to the pain. When I first started going to my counselor, I couldn't make sense of what made the break-up so hard when I had "jumped through the hoops" before. The "every guy is different" angle just did not satisfy me and you know what she said? She said "You didn't just date him for this certain amount of time. You've been together a lot longer than that." It's totally true! He was my best friend before we dated (I hit up a bunch of other threads, so I'm sorry if I'm repeating myself and you've read one of my responses) and it's completely about that: I let him in my heart and he's seen the best, the worst in me. Can you see? No wonder it's hard. I can see myself feeling the same feelings that you are if I ever hear that he's getting married to someone else. You have someone whom you call "10x the woman she (Ex) ever was" so mad props to you for finding it in yourself to take the risk again.
Author Foreverfrustrated Posted March 23, 2008 Author Posted March 23, 2008 Brother, you have to grieve. I heard this crappy advice that one should not grieve longer than how long the relationship lasted, but that's totally not true. Grieving time varies from one person to another. My ex and I have not been together for a year and a half now and it still hurts. It hurts less now because I slowly getting numb to the pain. When I first started going to my counselor, I couldn't make sense of what made the break-up so hard when I had "jumped through the hoops" before. The "every guy is different" angle just did not satisfy me and you know what she said? She said "You didn't just date him for this certain amount of time. You've been together a lot longer than that." It's totally true! He was my best friend before we dated (I hit up a bunch of other threads, so I'm sorry if I'm repeating myself and you've read one of my responses) and it's completely about that: I let him in my heart and he's seen the best, the worst in me. Can you see? No wonder it's hard. I can see myself feeling the same feelings that you are if I ever hear that he's getting married to someone else. You have someone whom you call "10x the woman she (Ex) ever was" so mad props to you for finding it in yourself to take the risk again. Thanks for the support, your right. It sucks because i let her into my heart, like yourself and she saw the best and the worst in me, and I in her, and it hurts so much to be left completly out of it at all. It's hard, and while i have a great girlfriend now, we've been together for almost 4 months now, it's still hard to let her in, and i know it's not her fault, but i'm so much more guarded with my heart now. I don't know the future with this one, but i'm must more hesitant to let myself love anymore. I just got so tired of being lonely, and things worked out well with the new one so we just started going together. So i'm just hoping i can get over these feelings, cause all i really want in my other half, is my best friend...
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