jacinda Posted March 22, 2008 Posted March 22, 2008 Hello. I broke up with my boyfriend last week. He still has a few things of mine at his place, but I can't get him to talk to me. I have tried twice - once via text and once via email - to get him to talk to me about our relationship - but he won't respond to me. I think he is angry with me tho I don't know why. There was no blowout fight, no name calling, no crying or screaming. I broke up with him because I felt that he'd led me on. Anyway, how do I get my stuff back from him? Should I just leave him alone for a while and then contact him again?
sedona Posted March 22, 2008 Posted March 22, 2008 Or maybe you have a mutual friend who could get your stuff back for you?
bejshermanoaks Posted March 22, 2008 Posted March 22, 2008 Do you still want to be with him? If you do, start there by telling him you want to be with him. If you just want your stuff back, text "please leave my stuff outside your door"--nothing else OR have a mutual friend get it back..
Shindig Posted March 22, 2008 Posted March 22, 2008 Tell him you're going to stop by his work on a specific day and at a specific time whether you hear from him or not. It'll have to be civil since it's a public place. Promise you'll be on your best behavior and just to bring your stuff.
Author jacinda Posted March 22, 2008 Author Posted March 22, 2008 Do you still want to be with him? If you do, start there by telling him you want to be with him. If you just want your stuff back, text "please leave my stuff outside your door"--nothing else OR have a mutual friend get it back.. I miss him and wouldn't be opposed to getting back together with him. I told him I wanted to talk to clear some things up but he won't respond to me. I broke it off with him but perhaps shouldn't have.
bejshermanoaks Posted March 22, 2008 Posted March 22, 2008 thats the issue--he's hurt...If you want to be back with him, apologize. Tell him you messed up bad and shouldnt have broken up with him. i dont know if you should or shouldnt end it with this guy, but if you overreacted and broke up with him, he's pissed. Dont even mention the stuff unless its really over and you want it to be over. Focus on wanting to talk about the relationship and apologize, my love. Good luck sweetheart--he might not warm up to you right away--no one likes rejection, put yourself in his shoes.
Shindig Posted March 22, 2008 Posted March 22, 2008 bejshermanoaks is right. This is bigger than material belongings. He's got some good advice. Good luck.
bejshermanoaks Posted March 23, 2008 Posted March 23, 2008 If I may be blunt--try being more honest with yourself--whats striking me as interesting is you made a post about your belongings, when the issue isnt your belongings at all--the issue is about you breaking up with him. Get your thoughts straight before you call him, cause if you cant be honest on this anonymous forum, Im concerned you wont be honest to him...Im thinking your ego is having issues with the fact that you made a boo boo and shouldnt have broken up with him. We've all done and said things we dont mean--unfortunately some things have bigger repercussions than others..so, get your head in order and only call him when you know what it is you really want. Good luck my love I think the ball is very much in your court--be loving and apologetic if you want him back.
Author jacinda Posted March 23, 2008 Author Posted March 23, 2008 Thanks for the good advice everyone. To be clear, I broke up with him because he told me that after 7 mos of being fairly involved in each other's lives and being a couple, he told me that he didn't see it as anything more than casual. That really upset me. It could be however that I should have talked to him more to find out exactly what he meant by that. I'm not looking to get married any time soon or anything, but I am not going to invest in a relationship that's not going anywhere either. If it's casual it should be called casual.
bejshermanoaks Posted March 23, 2008 Posted March 23, 2008 Hmm...yeah, I can see what you mean...I dont know--yeah, guess we'd have to know what he meant by casual..
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