gaussian Posted March 22, 2008 Posted March 22, 2008 I am a first-time poster! I feel like I have really struck gold with the guy that I'm dating now. It's been somewhere near a month, and we've got tons in common and are compatible in about every way. The only thing is, he said on the first date how he had come out of a serious 5-year relationship a year-and-a-half ago, and is really busy in his first year of his own business, and wanted to keep things simple. I was cool with that, gave it a lot of thought, and told myself that since I was busy too, that would be okay. I put myself in the mindset that I would look on this as a "friends with benefits" kind of situation. Somewhere around our third date, things REALLY started to change. He was all "googly-eyed" during our conversation, and he got really affectionate toward me. This has been the case ever since, and he's told me that he missed me, communicates well (prompt and clear), and even has said that he wants to spend less time having sex with me and more time just doing fun things. I'm really falling for him, but I'm not sure if I should wait for a couple of months to bring up the "Are we a couple?" talk, or what? He's really stressed with his business, and I'm stressed with finishing my B.A., and we probably don't need any drama right now. Opinions?
curiousnycgirl Posted March 22, 2008 Posted March 22, 2008 I actually never felt the need to have that discussion with my b/f until we were together over 2 years, and fighting. At which point I said you know we never discussed monogamy - I just thought I knew - now I'm not so sure. To which he replied that yes he was monogamous. Had I not gotten angry the conversation would never have come up. I just knew. I've never relaly understood the need to have that discussion, especially if you are already having sex with him. It's one thing if you say you won't have sex until you are a couple, but if you already are, what's the point? Just enjoy it, roll with the punches and see how it goes. Sounds to me like he really appreciates that you are not pressuring him.
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