underpants Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 I don't want to. So, I am to be whisked away to a mountain retreat to be introduced to some best friends. There is continued talk about some hot tub. Now don't get me wrong. A soak sounds nice. However, I just don't feel comfortable about chatting with new people in a hot tub. It is just strange and kind of pervy and ...I will be on some strange remote mountain (insert banjo music here). The last thing I feel like doing is putting my very pale self into a bathing suit and boiling with new friends. I was told that if I *forget* my bathing suit that another one will be provided. (darn) I have one day to loose 5 pounds and get a tan, or learn how to dismantle a hot tub. Am I being odd?
Pyro Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 Oh get over it. How come it seems like women always feel like they need to lose weight? I'm not sure what you can say to get out of it. You could say you are allergic to water. *Humming the theme to Deliverance out loud.*
Author underpants Posted March 20, 2008 Author Posted March 20, 2008 I'm not sure what you can say to get out of it. You could say you are allergic to water. Well, my sick sense of humor is musing all sorts of very bad first impressions to make. I could climb in the hot tub then immediately start hissing and meowing and clawing my way out. Then pout in the corner as I lick myself dry. That ought to start the introductions nicely.
Pyro Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 Well, my sick sense of humor is musing all sorts of very bad first impressions to make. I could climb in the hot tub then immediately start hissing and meowing and clawing my way out. Then pout in the corner as I lick myself dry. That ought to start the introductions nicely. :laugh: Tell them that you are a gremlin and unless they want you to multiply....... One Underpants is more than enough.
Author underpants Posted March 20, 2008 Author Posted March 20, 2008 Might be a bit of a swingers party planned... You know... I actually addressed that concern. I was assured that it was not at all like that. Then again, upon asking if there was anything I could bring. The response was...'just your natural self'. I wonder if my cell phone will have reception? I'm totally taking my car. Guess this little trip will be revealing in at least one way.
tanbark813 Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 If you poop in the hot tub it will put an end to it pretty quickly.
Author underpants Posted March 20, 2008 Author Posted March 20, 2008 If you poop in the hot tub it will put an end to it pretty quickly. Oh, I can't possibly do that. However, I could stop for a Baby Ruth on the way. It is too late for me to order this: http://www.dominicantoday.com/dr/this-and-that/2007/1/11/21441/Burqini-Muslim-womens-reply-to-bikini
directx Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 You know, I don't blame ya Unders. I feel the same way. At least as a woman you can wear a one piece suit which isn't too bad. Take a suit and play it by ear. maybe it won't as pervy as you imagine. Some hot tubs are pretty big so it may not be that 'cozy'
Author underpants Posted March 20, 2008 Author Posted March 20, 2008 I'm going to get some arm floaties. Should I get enough for everyone? What is the etiquette there?
directx Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 If you are bringing a floatie, you have to bring a snorkel.
tanbark813 Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 I'm going to get some arm floaties. That would be awesome. Put them on all nonchalant with enough to give everyone and then when they look at you funny you can be like-->
Pyro Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 I'm going to get some arm floaties. Should I get enough for everyone? What is the etiquette there? Don't forget the snorkel and the rest of the diving gear.
directx Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 Don't forget the snorkel and the rest of the diving gear. You know, i was thinking the same thing about the snorkel and almost posted that. Bring an inflatable floatie as well. And shark repellent
Author underpants Posted March 20, 2008 Author Posted March 20, 2008 Don't forget the snorkel and the rest of the diving gear. No. Then we venture back to the pervy side of things. I like the arm floaties because it is silly. Also, it does ensure that everyones' arms stay a float. Maybe I can find one of those rings that can serve as my inflatable forcefield.
Pyro Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 No. Then we venture back to the pervy side of things. I like the arm floaties because it is silly. Also, it does ensure that everyones' arms stay a float. Maybe I can find one of those rings that can serve as my inflatable forcefield. I know. Thats the point. Don't count on having cell phone service.
Kamille Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 A weekend in a hot tub lost somewhere in the mountains sounds divine to me. Any way we could switch identities for the weekend? All you have to do is go to all 12 games of a hockey tornament and try to follow the crazy easter weekend family dinner schedule. Free ham will be provided.
Author underpants Posted March 20, 2008 Author Posted March 20, 2008 A weekend in a hot tub lost somewhere in the mountains sounds divine to me. Well, there are 2 ways this can go. That sentence is the premise of many horror movies. Hockey and ham, that sounds pretty good. 12 games though, that is alot. Let's hope we both make it back.
Author underpants Posted March 20, 2008 Author Posted March 20, 2008 Don't forget the turkey leg UP. Oh yea. That way I can talk about how I like to feed it to my Love Ahh.
Kamille Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 Well, there are 2 ways this can go. That sentence is the premise of many horror movies. Hockey and ham, that sounds pretty good. 12 games though, that is alot. Let's hope we both make it back. I do think we have plenty of material here for a good horror flick: the hockey ring that turned into a gigantic hot tub, the ham that chased burkani clad Unders in the moutains...
directx Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 I do think we have plenty of material here for a good horror flick: the hockey ring that turned into a gigantic hot tub, the ham that chased burkani clad Unders in the moutains... As long as you don't get laid, you won't die! (following horror movie rules)
Art_Critic Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 No cannonballs into the center of the hot tub !!
MsJJ Posted March 21, 2008 Posted March 21, 2008 omg LOL! I have been laughing at almost all of the posts. You guys are pretty funny!
Kamille Posted March 21, 2008 Posted March 21, 2008 I am currently drinking ze perfect hot tub drink: hot chocolate with a dash of Cointreau. Moi? oh, I am ze character that drank Chocolat au Cointreau in ze 'ot tub yes? And then, next thing I knew, a burkini clad hockey player was chasing me with a ham. In ze big big mountains. Yes. I got laid recently. I am doomed. Save me Unders!
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