iwish Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 Okay i was tempted all day yesterday to text her to see how her time was in new york... I held off... i stopped myself!! but then out of the blue my hands started texting and before i knew it, i'd sent a message.. Hey, how was New york? what you up to? she replied.. Blimey how did you know i was back? I'm in a taxi going home, you? Right at this point i realised that she wasn't ready to talk and i thought man, i'm not going to reply to that.. just leave her be... she's not exactly warm... then about 20 mins later she texts me again.. I don't get you, you text me i reply then you go all silent on me... so i reply with.. well i felt that you wasn't really ready for a chat so i left it... blah blah.. Now, we texted back and forth, me being nice and her just being well.. kinda nasty and accusing.. she just kept saying about my ex's and how i'm seeing them and stuff.. of course i'm not and i told her so.. anyway i got round to ask her if she fancied a chat in two sat's time.. she said she'd think about it.. she even offered to talk to me on the phone now, well i really didn't want to but she called and i picked up.. we talked, she was tired and grumpy and full of negativity.. I was trying to get her to look on the good side of going to New York with work, but she just kept whinging about how bad it was.. how ugly it was.. It's like bloody hell woman!, it's better than sitting in an office for those days... (i didn't say that, just thought it..) now the conversation went on, not great i must admit, she wasn't really trying to be nice and i was... so i asked her about 2 sats time.. she replied with i'll think about it as i might have plans???! .. i mean come on, two sats time.. i'm giving enough notice.. just a chat! (didn't say that) just laughed it off and said ok... then she went on to say how lucky i was that she was talking to me.. now, she broke up with me.. she has basically ignored me for the last 7 weeks.. i cried in front of her, 5 weeks ago.. cried like a bloody baby, i was heartbroken!! absolutely devastated... she is angry with me for texting her, good things and nasty things (i.e you never cared or loved me)... Now i was hurt, i was in a world of pain.. i reacted badly, i admit that.. but i haven't bothered texting for nearly 2 weeks... just left her to it... apart from the saturday drunk text, which was nice but was a bit of a booty call and she didn't appreciate that!! Now, i have to leave it alone and not text/call etc.. i've invited her out, she's going to think about it.. it'll probably be a no.. but i'm prepared for that... sort of! i just don't get why she's such a moody git these days, i'm trying to stop myself from saying to her.. sod you.. treat me with some respect.. i was upset yeah, i missed you and loved you and you dumped me! of course i was upset and people don't take rejection well and you hurt me too in the breakup period, you said nasty things and you still do!!! i mean commenting on my ex's is just rubbish, how dare you!! i've been bessoted with you for the last 7 weeks, i still am i guess (less so).. stop being such a cold person towards me and just RELAX!!! damn!
Ocean-Blue Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 Sigh. You are going to keep going in circles till you really adhere to the NC approach. No texting. No calling. And no contact. C'mon now. You are only prolonging the inevitable.
Green Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 if you haven't memorized her number no contact will be easy. Just delete and erase all traces of her phone number so you can't text or call anymore
EllaDerSpin Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 Be very honest and ask yourself what kind of reaction to you, you would like to see in her.
sweaterlove Posted March 20, 2008 Posted March 20, 2008 I agree. It's hard but hold off on any contact. Delete her number if you have to. If you have her number memorized, try to figure out what times you are tempted to contact her and do something that makes it hard to use your phone. Like have coffee w/ a friend or go for a bike ride.
Author iwish Posted March 21, 2008 Author Posted March 21, 2008 well, i got my wish.. she texted me!! nothing bad, nothing good.. just seeing how my Good Friday was going, i replied and that was that.. But i was ecstatic that she texted me!! I'm out tonight, i'm trying not to get too carried away, but
smileysmile Posted March 21, 2008 Posted March 21, 2008 whats your story? She dumped you? You are pining for her? You sound like me but I have contact 'cos of my daughter.
Author iwish Posted March 21, 2008 Author Posted March 21, 2008 Well my story is on here, more or less.. but a quick update, after the original text she's agreed to meet me next saturday as friends, no pressure just chat and have a laugh.. is that an opportunity? I'm not sure, i mean it's in my hands i think.. if i just be myself maybe i can dispel the unjustified hate that she has for me since the breakup, maybe i can show her that, that isn't me? i mean i begged, i said stuff i regret, but i was hurt.. and maybe just maybe she will remember who i am? what do you think? am i hoping for a lost cause?
EllaDerSpin Posted March 22, 2008 Posted March 22, 2008 I think if trying is something you really feel you have to do, then by all means do it. That said, you really do have to take her at her word. If she is saying just friends, its probably exactly what she means. Are you going to deal with her rejecting you any easier now than you did a few weeks ago? Is it going to prolong pain, worsen it, give you false hope? Can you really act 'naturally' when it's not the way you feel? These are all questions you have to ask yourself and be honest with the answers to.
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