snoopdawg Posted July 10, 2003 Posted July 10, 2003 [font=arial][/font] Hi everyone, Accidentally found this site while looking for some advice let me know what you think ..... I have recently broke up with my gf after 6 months, I know this is not long but I loved everything about her. I have been in many long term relationships and had a few inbetweens aswell, I therefore had a good idea of what kind of person I wanted to be with. Which in my mind was her. We met through a mutual friend, just so happend to be my best friend. His parents are incidentally also best friends with my ex gf parents, almost like family. I know recipe for disaster!. Besides all this we were close friends for about 1 year, I always liked her and hoped we could have a relationship. She is just about 29 and I'm 24. Things were absolutely amazing for the whole time I went out her, she made me very happy - things were spontanious and never boring. I dont tend to think about my gf's previous partners but in this case I had to show some consideration for the past. My gf was engaged for 8 years or so, and the guy just can't let her go. She called of the wedding 2 months beforehand, and I now realise how bad he must have felt. They have not been together for 2 years. Anyway, the entire time I was with her he would contact her. I never had a problem with this as I understood that this person was a big part of her life. I constantly reassured her, she was amazing in my eyes - so I made a point of telling her whenever I could. I believe in letting people know when I like them otherwise it may never be said. A couple of weeks ago we had a great day out with all my friends. I have a friend that I love but I know he can be a flirt. He was joking around with my gf and then then I played the jelousy card. I felt hurt that I never got that attention and I also felt taken for granted. Maybe it was a culmination of the ex bf and the situation coupled with my insecurity in the relationship. I also felt very bad of the accusation I made of my friend. Out of character for me! This is where it got messy, not suprisingly she was very upset and drove home. I went to her house to try and sort things out but it was all in vain. We have met up a few times since then but she says she just wants to be friends which I have to accept Ive caused enough damage. I think she will feel awkward (as I will) around both families and my friend. On the other hand, I have helped her through a whole host of problems when we went out - I know that doesn't entitle me to a medal or anything. When we argued we talked things through and sorted things out. Im not an argumentative person - they most always ended in her apologising. She told me that I brought the best out in her, this was flattering I therefore wanted to give her 100% and be there for her through whatever. I also love her sooo much. She's all I wanted!. She will continue to be in contact with me, but I cant turn my feelings off!! - I know I have to move on, but I feel that I have lost some of me. I have been a bit withdrawn lately. She is also stressed at her job and I was always there to support her before - her parents work out of the country. On a more positive note - I have healed a little - I have been thinking about her all day and even dream about her. I know if I truly love her I will leave her alone, which is what I intend to do. She said that she was falling in love with me. I will see her occasionaly - do you think you can go from lovers to friends, then friends to lovers ?? I know I blew it but things are ok with my friend and the families are ok..... Do you think I can get her back ?
MercyRose Posted July 11, 2003 Posted July 11, 2003 Your behaviour may have overpowered her and put her off you as a romantic partner. Women don't like paranoid over reactions in public in front of friends. Give her a bit of space to get over it and get things into perspective. Then do something romantic and tell her you want to be in a relationship with her. If she turns you down again then accept her decision because she has probably decided you are not the one for her.
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