wareagle Posted March 17, 2008 Posted March 17, 2008 My ex just text me, I have been doing good with the nc rule since she left me. Today she text me asking me if I sold my truck. Is this just a way to open the door to talking to me again. I know I shouldn't text her back, but it's hard to not respond to a simple question like that. I haven't responded I just need some help from you guy's telling me not to. Why does she care if I sold my truck, why does it matter to her? Help me it's only been a week since she left and I don't know if I have the strength to ignore the text!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Starsky Posted March 17, 2008 Posted March 17, 2008 You can always be civil and just respond with either "yes, i've sold the truck" or "no, i haven't sold the truck." Do not expect anything out of your response to her message. She probably just wants to know if she still has you on that "emotional leash." Don't let her get to you; go out and have some fun with friends.
mark982 Posted March 18, 2008 Posted March 18, 2008 you have a week of nc in,why screw it up? she's just tring to see if she can string you along. blow her off!
Author wareagle Posted March 18, 2008 Author Posted March 18, 2008 Haven't text her back! I am feeling pretty strong right now, thanks guys, wish me luck.
atc2410 Posted March 18, 2008 Posted March 18, 2008 If it were me I'd answer the question. You can be civil and not come across as needy. It's not my style to ignore someone. If you ended badly or something occurred where by she no longer deserves your politeness then that's a different story.
City_girl Posted March 18, 2008 Posted March 18, 2008 Cat and mouse springs to mind. Answer her question directly if it's not your way to ignore and ignoring will say more than a reply if the knows you well enough.Say nothing more than yes, glad that's out of the way or no, but I expect it will sell at some point. Be as matter of fact as you can.
Author wareagle Posted March 18, 2008 Author Posted March 18, 2008 Yea I feel like it's a cat and mouse game to, like she's wanting to see if I will bite. It is a simple question, but once I text her back (knowing her) it will open up the door for more questions about me, that will eventually lead to questions about her, I don't think I am ready to have the kind of questions I think she will ask. Remember fellas I am trying to move on not reconcile.
eagle5 Posted March 18, 2008 Posted March 18, 2008 It is a simple question, but once I text her back (knowing her) it will open up the door for more questions about me, that will eventually lead to questions about her, I don't think I am ready to have the kind of questions I think she will ask. Remember fellas I am trying to move on not reconcile. Good reason to stick with NC and not give her the satisfaction.
CaliGuy Posted March 18, 2008 Posted March 18, 2008 Yea I feel like it's a cat and mouse game to, like she's wanting to see if I will bite. It is a simple question, but once I text her back (knowing her) it will open up the door for more questions about me, that will eventually lead to questions about her, I don't think I am ready to have the kind of questions I think she will ask. Remember fellas I am trying to move on not reconcile. To her it's a cat and mouse game. To you it shouldn't be a game at all. Ignore her attempts to contact you. She's just tossing out breadcrumbs to make sure you're still on her string, when and a BIG IF she ever decides she wants to try again. If you feel like being second best to every man she dates then by all means, reply back to her.
Author wareagle Posted March 18, 2008 Author Posted March 18, 2008 Well I did not respond to her text last night and I didn't hear from her again until this afternoon. Just a little background, about a month ago I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes, once you are diagnose it is hightly recommended to see an opthamologist to make sure that you do not have any thing wrong with your eyes because of the diabetes. She was supposed to make me an appointment with her doctor, but never got around to it. So I found my own. She text me telling me not to forget to make an appointment with an eye doctor. Does she genuinly care or is she trying to open the door to talking again? Is she trying to keep my at arms length in case whatever she is doing right now doesn't work out and she can want to run back to me?
NotMyselfNEmore Posted March 18, 2008 Posted March 18, 2008 Is she trying to keep my at arms length in case whatever she is doing right now doesn't work out and she can want to run back to me? I think you've got your answer!!!!
Author wareagle Posted March 27, 2008 Author Posted March 27, 2008 Well I just got another text from my ex, asking me if she had gotten any mail at my house for her lately. It's kinda ironic because I have always put what mail she has gotten here since she moved out in her locker at work, she knows I would never keep anything she got here from her. Today I put some things I had gotten for the vacation we had planned for May in her locker. It was kinda late in the day when I did it so I don't know if she got it or not today. Is it just a coincidence that she would text me tonight to ask about mail? She hasn't text me me in over a week. Head games? Trying to open the door and get me to communicate with her?
LuCidiTy Posted March 27, 2008 Posted March 27, 2008 there's a name for this syndrome...using any excuse to make contact...i can't remember it. i once had an ex show up at my (new) door with a rusty potato peeler one day and a washcloth a few days later. and speaking of mail, he also used to bring it to me at work...junk mail addressed to occupant. weird.
Author wareagle Posted March 27, 2008 Author Posted March 27, 2008 That's to funny lucidity, I hope you were joking? LOL!!!!
Joebo Posted March 27, 2008 Posted March 27, 2008 My ex just text me, I have been doing good with the nc rule since she left me. Today she text me asking me if I sold my truck. Is this just a way to open the door to talking to me again. Did you sell it? If not and she's seen someone else driving it then maybe she's trying to do you a favour! Is GTA a problem in your area?
Author wareagle Posted March 27, 2008 Author Posted March 27, 2008 Man we have a bunch of comedians in the house tonight. lol jk. She knew I had somebody interested in buying it so she knew I was trying to sell it. The thing is why would she care? She dumped me, she didn't want to be with me. So why is concerned about my truck? Or my doc's appointment, and she knows I have always been an honest person and would never keep her mail, even if it was junk mail.
Author wareagle Posted March 27, 2008 Author Posted March 27, 2008 Man we have a bunch of comedians in the house tonight. LOL jk. She knew I had somebody interested in buying it, and she knows that I am an honest person and would never keep any mail that she had gotten here even if it was junk mail. So I believe it's just a ploy to get me to open up conversation with her. Am I right?
Author wareagle Posted March 27, 2008 Author Posted March 27, 2008 Sorry fellas I posted the same thing twice. Forgive me.
LuCidiTy Posted March 27, 2008 Posted March 27, 2008 That's to funny lucidity, I hope you were joking? LOL!!!! nope...all true!
dfreeman Posted March 27, 2008 Posted March 27, 2008 Sorry fellas I posted the same thing twice. Forgive me. I would forgive you, but you posted the same thing twice - and they're different!
Author wareagle Posted March 30, 2008 Author Posted March 30, 2008 Well just an update. My ex text me on fri. telling me that everything with the vacation we had scheduled for may was taken care of, this is a vacation that I have paid half for and I am not even going. She said to let her know that I got her text. I didn't respond. Just a few minutes ago she instant messaged me saying Hi. My heart stopped I got that aching in my belly, I got nervous, but I didn't respond just signed out of messenger. I have taken her out of my contacts, but apparently she still has me on hers. Why do I feel so bad about this? I wanted so bad to respond to her, I miss her so much.
NickP Posted March 30, 2008 Posted March 30, 2008 Did you sell it? If not and she's seen someone else driving it then maybe she's trying to do you a favour! Is GTA a problem in your area? .lollll.. nw tats jus bein silly lol. newez,if u dunt wanna reconcile, u gotta wash her clean outta every aspect of ur life. u shouldn't care if she still does or doesn't care bout u. irregardless of what she's trying to do(get you back or w/e) just stay focussed on telling yourself that it's over and there's nothing in this WORLD that can change that. ignore it all!!!! don't let her mind-f**k you! personally i dunt c a point in being polite,etc. at least not at the expense of hurting urself, i.e. not until you're ready to be polite as a friend n all that.
NickP Posted March 30, 2008 Posted March 30, 2008 Well just an update. My ex text me on fri. telling me that everything with the vacation we had scheduled for may was taken care of, this is a vacation that I have paid half for and I am not even going. She said to let her know that I got her text. I didn't respond. Just a few minutes ago she instant messaged me saying Hi. My heart stopped I got that aching in my belly, I got nervous, but I didn't respond just signed out of messenger. I have taken her out of my contacts, but apparently she still has me on hers. Why do I feel so bad about this? I wanted so bad to respond to her, I miss her so much. tis gonna sound harsh dude. Have some self-respect!! she hurt you bad.. and you've made a decision to move on! be a man and stick to it! don't succumb no matter the circumstance. keep on NC till you're certain you're over her. distract yourself with other things and don't think about her. phone a friend and talk..tell the person how you feel.it will make u feel better!or write it all out on a piece of paper/word document..& save it somewhere. what i did was to vent out how much I missed my x on a paper or to a friend and what I missed bout her,etc. it'll help let those feelings out. but dunt give in, u gotta remember how much she's hurt you. gd luk
Author wareagle Posted March 30, 2008 Author Posted March 30, 2008 I totally agree with you, it's just hard and I don't know why. I guess it is a self respect thing, I must of not had any when I let her treat me like sh*t for so long. I have never let anyone treat me this bad. Well I signed back on to messenger this morning and the only message she left offline was did you cancel the card. I had a mastercard in my name we were using for this vac, and she was an authorized user. I paid off the card and had her account closed so she couldn't ruin my credit. Honestly I don't think she would, but I couldn't take that chance. I know what I have to do I know what the brain is telling me. It's my heart that I don't trust, it has gotten me into trouble before. Actually I wouldn't be here now if I would have listened to my brain. LOL
heartoutside Posted March 30, 2008 Posted March 30, 2008 There will come a point where you'll see you are much better off with out her, trust me. I know that seems to far from the truth and you can't even begin to picture it, but it will happen. I've reached that point this weekend! After my ex and I got back together (after 5 months apart and 3 months of NC on my part) she left me again 3 weeks later saying she needed to be single and get her life together and get some "help." I went for it and thought she really meant every word. NOPE. About a month and a half later she announces that she's in a relationship (with who I don't know, and I don't care!). I instantly deleted her from my life, I trashed everything I had left from her (some pics and a xmas card) and deleted her from my life totally (phone number, email, MSN screen name, facebook, myspace etc etc!). This time it's for good. And I've got to tell ya, I feel free. I'm not worried about my actions anymore, the "String" has been cut, and she no longer has any control on my life what-so-ever! It's hard not to follow your heart, I can totally relate. But I think what also happens is we start to base our self worth off this "past" relationship so we hold on even more to the "relationship" because it has become so much a part of who we are. But once you being to see that your self worth has nothing to do with the "relationship" that you are free of that past, you begin to become a new person. All I can say is erasing her from my life is the best thing I've done for myself through this whole thing!
Recommended Posts