this is just getting silly.

[fudge_cake_89]

as soon as you read the first line you are probably going to think, you sad sad loser...but its actually really getting to me now!

 

to dive straight in, i cant seem to get over a guy.

 

we first 'met' in tenerife airport on 16th august 2005 on our way to La Gomera for our holidays.

from the first moment our eyes met, i was hooked.

we shared magical moments (kinda like in movies.. ) staring into each others eyes for the whole holiday (a week), but because i was stupidly shy, and more so because i was with my family, and he was with his, we never spoke.

my whole holiday revolved around him, pretty much, and then came the day we left, and still no conversation.

I wrote a note with my name, email address and number on, ready to give to him, and guess what..i never did.

 

watching him disappear when my coach drove away was soul destroying.

 

i cried myself to sleep for weeks, i thought about him all the time, everything around seemed to remind me of him, and for months there seemed no way of forgetting him.

 

i managed to get over him when i met a new guy 18 months later, but after 6 months in a relationship, it fell apart, and my mind thought back to the guy from holiday.

 

when i came to uni 2 years and 2 months later, i still thought about him, i looked round every face on nights out to see if i would recognise it to be his, but i havent yet, i met a guy who was so nice, and we were seeing each other for a while, but that fizzled out. ive recently met another guy, who is amazing, we get on so well, and he is very attractive , but i just cant bring myself to like him as much as the holiday guy.

 

no guy i meet lives up to the guy from my holiday, and no-one can beat that magical connection we had.

 

god i sound sad..lol..

 

but im getting really annoyed now, because i do really like the guy im seeing, but because i dont feel that connection with him, as i did on holiday, i cant bring myself to be in a relationship with him.

 

MY LOVE LIFE SUCKS!

i want to be with a guy, but no-one lives up to what i had on holiday, and that was just eye contact for gods sake!

 

its driving me mad!

 

i keep thinking, oh well maybe im being too picky...maybe i should jst go for it and see where it takes me, but i just cant seem to let myself do it.

 

HELP!

 

 

dont really know what anyone could say to this...but its just good to get it out...not that that solves problems...but gah!

 

you may laugh now.

x