aussielover Posted March 14, 2008 Posted March 14, 2008 Okay, I am an intern for a counseling program. My husband wanted me to get out of school quicker so he decided to stop working and allow me to focus completely on school and take more classes... Now I am about 5 months away from finishing but it is COMPLETELY consuming my life. There's very little time that my husband and I have for eachother at this point and we know it's a temporary thing but it's really difficult feeling disconnected and having no way to really spend the time that we need to spend on each other. Now, whenever we do get a change to talk we tell each other about what is going on in our lives...enter my problem... My husband seems completely disinterested in everything that I want to talk about...he looks sooooo bored and like he's going to fall asleep. When I talked to him about it he tells me that he's interested in me, just not the subject. but this "subject" is really pretty much all I can focus on and it feels like my life (which is what he wanted me to do anyway!) so it feels like to me that he's not interested in my life. Also, we've been having issues in the sex department. We've always had different sex drives and his has always been a lot higher than mine,,but lately for a little over a month the grind of school has become so intense that I've just about completely forgotten about sex. Instead of saying something to me, he just became really distant and I feel a real rift in our marriage. Then he finally did say something and I felt really awful...but I don't know how I am supposed to do all that he wants me to do (I am currently putting a ton of effort into getting better with the cleaning, finances, school stuff, etc. the things that I sometimes slack up on that cause him stress) and now I have to work on sex. I really have no sex drive whatsoever, I love it when I am doing it and never have trouble having an orgasm but it isn't somehting that ever pops into my mind. I haven't been "horny" in about 5 years. seriously. Well, this is obviously taking a toll, I"ve tried antidepressants (they just make me feel less guilty about not meeting my husbands needs). I don't know how to help this, I don't feel like I can change my desire level and right now I don't feel like I want to because of the disinterest he's showing in me. I am so hurt and upset... what do I do??? First question (trying to organize this a lil better): what do I do to increase my sex drive-it's constantly completely absent. second- how do I take that he's so disinterested in what I am doing? which makes me feel like he's completely disinterested in me???
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