jellybabyman Posted March 12, 2008 Posted March 12, 2008 Hi All, This is my first post on this forum, and I am looking for some advice. My story is a rather long and complex story but I will summarise it for you. I was dating a girl for 5 years, but tragically she lost her life 2 years ago. I picked myself up and during the difficult time after her death I met this fantastic girl I work with. We starting hanging out and eventually started dating. She was with me through all the bad times and helped me through. We made a fantastic couple and had plans for the furture. My ex always had troubles dealing with my past right from the word go, but we managed to work through. We lasted 8 months before she became very unhappy and stressed with the situation. She got lots of stick from so called friends and the whole relationship became to difficult for her. We split up 4 months ago, but up until recently we have been in constant contact and seeing each other. Occasionally she gets upsets and says how she wanted to be with me but things are just too difficult for her. Now the confusing issue to me is why have we been in contact so much and still behaving like girlfriend and boyfriend, but she wont go back out with me. This last week or so she has started to go quiet on me. Now I dont think she is seeing anyone else, I just think she is still upset with the situation and needs time away from me and the stress that is associated with me. Now the problem for me is that it is really causing me a lot of heart ache as I really love this girl, and Im pretty sure she feels the same, but just cant come to terms with my situation. I have tried the no contact idea but she keeps initiating contact and when I then try to give non descript answers I come across as rude. Is there any hope for us? what should I do? Your thoughts would be appreciated.
AvgJoeDoe Posted March 13, 2008 Posted March 13, 2008 well i think that when you meet someone the past stays behind and what matters is the present after you met her. When i met my ex i told her that. I dont care who you been with, what youve done and what problems you had. All it matters to me is since i met you. Now that said, she knew what went on with you and i think she just doesnt know what she wants specially at a certain age. I think the problem could be with her and shes just using the excuse of you. Now how long was the gap between you healing over the lost of your gf and moving forward with your now ex? I think if you didnt have enough time to heal and move on that might had been an issue with your current ex.
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