I hate this...

[Gunny376]

First off? The guys an alcohlic! A drunk?

 

Second? He's ADHD?

 

Third? He's an insensitive selfish, self-centered @zzhat!

 

I did the math? And according my Chinese Algebra? I figure your ahead of the game?

 

You never did tell us what's so great about this guy ~ other than your in love with him? I mean if he's God's gift to women, and the end-all to be all when it comes to women, dating, love making, etc ~ then he's certainly got some news us guys could use!

 

The truth of the matter is? He's a jerk!

 

He got with you when you were young and in-experienced? He took advantage of you and your lack of experience?

 

Once again? I was thinking about you at work? I just bought myself a new lap top, (I had to pull out my old trusty Colt .45, turn my head, cover my eyes, and put my HP PC out of her misery? )

 

I couldn't fine my 1885 edition of Quicken ~ so I strolled on down to "ChinaMart" aka WalMart and picked up the latest basic version of Quicken.

 

Being a big advocate of Dave Ramsey and Mary Hunt's "Debt Proof Living"

I relgiously track where every penny goes, and Quicken is a great way to do that? I use my debit card to make any and all purchases? When I get home? I update where I've been spending my money?

 

I use to stop by and get a $1.10 cup of coffee at the local convience store on the way to work? I quit doing that when Quicken showed me I was spending almost $300 a year on freaking coffee I could make for pennys at the house?

 

I avoid convience stores, packaging like the plague?

 

Quicken, (requires a little self discipline ~ and can be a pain the @zz in the begining is a great way to find out where you money is going?

 

ATM's at convience stores are a quick and easy access to fast cash? But they charge you two or three dollars for the privilege? So do banks that you don't belong two? But? Credit Unions don't charge you a dime if you use their network?

 

A dollar here, a nickle there? It adds up? I'm not so bad that I re-use tin foil and such? But, I watch what I buy? Asprin is a good example? You can buy Bayer at almost $5 a bottle, or you can buy the WalMart brand for.99 cents? Its the same ingredients ~ by Federal law!

 

So you might want to check out Quicken, "Debt Proof Living"

 

Take care of your pennies? And your dollars will take care of themselves!

[Confused9]

Thanks Gunny.

 

Financially, I am doing okay. I haven't used a credit card since he's left, even now that I don't get his $$ and I am paying OUR dept. I just checked my credit score and it ranges from 731-741 from the 3 bureaus and that is 'excellent' according to privacy guard. So I guess that is good. I am paying off my debt slowly and surely...something I know I wouldn't have done if I was still with my x.

 

It's just hard realizing he may have fallen out of love with me. I think of that all the time. I think of the phone calls we shared when he was cheating and the things he said or did. I think back to when I had NO idea anything was going on and he was living with this big secret 1,000s of miles away while he was suppossed to be working.

 

I can't understand how he could fall in love with her and want to marry her while he just left me. Left me high and dry. I know I never will but those are the things that eat at me every day. I wonder if he thinks of me and if he realizes what he's left behind. I question how he could turn his back on everything he knew for 29 years. I just don't get it. But, I guess that's not for me to 'get'. We are over. Completely over. No turning back. He's getting married. So let it be.

 

It just hurts. I feel worthless. I feel like he feels he got better. He is better. The thought that he could possibly be happy without me and no even shed a tear hurts. I thought I meant something to him. I was such a fool.

[Confused9]

Maybe I will splurge and by a bike PW?

 

I live right on the beach and I am a waitress 3 nights a week and my feet kill form working during the day at my 9-5 then going there so maybe a bike will be better? I like riding bikes. hmmmmm.